How can I talk to my mother about my miscarriage?

Question

I am 18 years old and made a mistake by sleeping with a co-worker back in June. I ended up finding out I was pregnant and my co-worker was put in jail for something I didn't even know about. He was a s*x-offender and had slept with a 15 year old with a fake ID when he was 19. He is 24 now. Anyway, I ended up miscarrying my baby at 4 weeks.

However, I never openly discussed my pregnancy with anyone, other than two close friends who knew me and the situation and they recognized my pregnancy symptoms right away.

I just moved to a new town across the state and I never talked to my mother about my miscarriage... she opened my computer and went though a bunch of files on it and found my journal saved to my computer and found out about the miscarriage that way. I wish I could have told her, but it was unexpected how she found out.

I also never told my co-worker I was pregnant or anything. He's going to be in jail for the next seven months or so, but I don't know if I want to tell him or not. I don't know if he'll try to deny the baby... and say it wasn't his.

Answer 1

keep your mother in mood , start talking about fun stuff you share good memories, ask her about things she will replies with yes yeah yeah yes,, so on, then tell her

Answer 2

Ask her if she ever miscarried? Chances are that she has had at least once in her life.  It may open her up a little.  Also don't fret too much about pleasing others. Miscarriage is a time for you to heal. The emotions are only hightened by the hormonal changes. I became an un-empathetic recluse for over a month before I could begin to get my head straight. And I wasn't even thrilled in the first place with being pregnant again after being a mom for 8 years.

Answer 3

It doesn't matter if he denys it or not cause you had a miscarriage you don't have to tell him. You shouldn't tie yourself back with him because of his past. On the other hand just have a heart to heart with your mom. Tell her you had just found out you were preggers and some people don't even tell their friends/family till after the first 3 months anyways because of the higher risk of miscarriage. you are an adult and you are doing what adults do. just trust your instincts and it may bring you and your mother closer, if you open up and just tell her how you feel now.  

Answer 4

In person, if you can, talk to ur mom while sitting next to her with her arm around you and start with "Mom.... I've been wanting to talk to you about something important... can you please just listen to me for 3 (5, 10) minutes without saying anything?.  I know you know about my miscarriage and I want to talk to you about it"  Spill ur guts out... everything... and go from there.  there might be tears...there might be angry words...it might be easy with love and hugs... you will get past it... u have a lot of learning curves ahead of you and your mom might be a valuable "got ur back" kinda person to have in the future.

u need someone besides other friends ur age that have never been through your situation... u need some other support that ur mom can help you find

Think about what ur motive is for telling the guy....what difference does it make if he believes if it was his or not?  U know the truth and u now learned an unfortunate valuable lesson...sounds like he is learning his

Get HIV testing... respect ur spirit/body as you've got a lot of years ahead of you...

Best wishes---