How can I teach my 6 year old son not to let the other kids get to him? Some days I pick him up and he is so?

Question

sad, saying no one played with him during recess. First, I don't want his feelings to be hurt, which I know is sometimes going to happen. I really just want him to be able to shake it off and play something else. How can I show him not to let these other kids hurt his feelings? I can't stand the thought of him playing alone...it breaks my heart because he wants to have friends so bad.

Answer 1

It's very hard to shake it off if you really don't have any friends.  It's much easier to shake off rejection if you have one or two friends to fall back on.  Does he have playdates with the kids at school? That's a really good way to get to know kids, which makes playing at school much easier.  The teacher is also a good resource for pairing kids together with likely friends for projects, etc. so that friendships can develop.  You can also talk to him about strategies for getting into a game that's already started.  I know at my kids' school a lot of the kids play soccer at recess and they let anyone join in who wants to, so if there's something like that going on it's a good way to get into the social scene.

Answer 2

Enpower him.  Kids are not born knowing societal norms.  Role play, teach him how to be confident and ask to join others.  Many 6 yr olds want to play with other kids but its hard for them to say hey Sam I'd like to play is that ok?  Kids this age are not very vindictive or clicky they generally accept all kids and I have first hand knowledge my son is Aspergers (high functioning autistic spectrum) and he is really awkward and quirky and I have gotten him to approach other kids, we work on social skills alot.  I volunteer in his class 1X a week so I have a good idea of the dynamic of the classroom and see first hand what he is having trouble with.  I would say half of his class have trouble approaching other kids and asking to play.  Just this weekend he went to a typical classmates party and only 4 of the class were invited.

Answer 3

Aww thats reallt sad... ask a parent in his class if you can make a play date/ sleep over for him and then when they go to school they might be tight friends!

Answer 4

To start you can say that kids that pick on someone are usally jealous of them. Its like the boy the constantly calls some girl in his class names, most likely that boy has a crush on him.

Is your son doing anything to make the other kids not like him? Is he not good at sports? My suggestions would be to send him to school with something he likes and is really good at. It could be that the kids who are playing in the group he wants to be a part of are only playing in that group because they feel they have to. Maybe your son will have something better, that will attract the other kids to him. However, it is important to make sure he does not become used.

Answer 5

you need to go speak to the teacher. Kids may be on their own for 2 minutes and it feels like forever and that is what he is focusing on. Talk to the teacher, get the real story and then if he is on his own then she can help him find some friends to play with. You can't teach him not to let it get to him. Who you play with is one of the biggest concerns for kids at school.

Answer 6

that is sad but you can talk to his teacher!!!!

Answer 7

What about a group activity like Boy Scouts, summer camp or softball - he'd connect with his classmates in an atmosphere of commraderie (sp?), and then he'd have friends back in the classroom?