How can i get my fiancee to stop lying to me about stupid things?

Question

my fiancee and i have been together for 4 years. in the last two hes become a liar. he lies to me about what time he finished work (he doesnt come home when his hours say he should have been) he lies to my face when he does something that will upset me, like i can see him break something and he will swear he didnt. he makes promises he NEVER keeps. he gave up smoking three years ago and smoked behind my back twice that i know of. i caught him doing it each time but he lied and swore he wasnt smoking!! i suspect hes doing it again behind my back as he smells like it after work. he also has been taking money from my purse and swearing he didnt then abusing me for confronting him but each time theres only been him and me in the house so no one else could have done it! would he be smoking? he has also got arrogant and nasty to me since starting his new job. what can i do to make him stop lying? ive threatened to leave it hasnt worked!

Answer 1

i hate to say it but if he is going to lie about small things then he will lie about big things too.  when people are lying to each other it isn't a healthy relationship.  you told him you were going to leave so do it.

Answer 2

I don't know but if you find out let me know.  My hubby lies about the stupidest things.  Nothing I do seems to work, i have tried being the nice understanding wife, the yelling wife ...........nothing works.  The one thing i can tell you is it is a huge issue in our marriage and it is stressful and heartbreaking.  He does not cheat or anything he just lies about stupid things like if he picked up the grocery I asked him to buy.   He is an amazing dad and is sweet and caring.....but the lying could be the reason I decide to leave someday.  He does not abuse me or anything.  If your boyfriend does you should leave. By the way the more you catch them in lies the more angry and mad they get.  They will accuse you of not trusting them and make you feel bad.  Don't marry him unless he gets help and stops lying.  I can say from personal experience that living in a marriage with no trust can destroy you emotionally.

Answer 3

You may very well want to reconsider this marriage that you are speaking of at present.  If you are stating that he is becoming abusive prior to marriage then imagine how this could become more problematic after you exchange vows.  You two may very well want to partake in family counseling prior to your wedding.  If trust is a factor now then believe me when I suggest that it will become more of an issue later.  Best of luck.

Answer 4

2 years of lies gee i reckon 2 hours of lies warrants a permanent breakup. who wants to live with a liar.

Answer 5

You need to follow through with your threats.

Why are you still with him?  He lies - if it's about small stuff that you know of, what big things are there you don't know about?  He also steals from you then abuses you - he has some serious issues and you would be better off leaving him for good.

Answer 6

when i read this all i can think of is that he is on some type of drug besides ciggs, all the signs are there...lyin, stealing, nd etc.