How can i improve my self-confidence?

Question

i have absolutely no faith in myself, & i rarely feel pretty, i'm loud & outgoing when i'm with my friends but totally shy with new people/people i don't know. i was just wondering if anybody had any ideas on how to combat this, i want to go through life believing that i can do anything i want to do & not be scared to try new things/meet new people, it just doesn't come naturally.

Answer 1

just dont care about anything

youre welcome

Answer 2

No one can tell you how to love yourself babe.. you've just gotta do things that make you feel attractive.. take a look at some sites that give make up tips.. maybe try doing some light exercise or yoga to clear your mind and make you feel more physically active.

You know what significantly increases my confidence?  When I find an educational subject of interest.. whether it be politics, history, science.. something I wouldn't learn in school, and I go online or read a book and learn about it.  The more intelligent you feel, the more you feel that you've got something useful to say.

Answer 3

Answer the following questions with a yes or no:

1.Are you well read and do you know about current affairs and other things that are going on in the world? (this is important if you want to make good conversation on different topics)

2.Do you take pride in your appearance and do your best to look good every time you step out.(this will make you more self confident and approachable)

3.Do you have an ambition and goals for your life that you want to achieve?( this will increase your self esteem)

If you answered no to any of the above questions that is an area you should work on.

First do these things as they are absolutely essential for you to gain self confidence.

Trying new things and meeting new people will come naturally once these things are in place. Trust me!

Best of luck!

Answer 4

Find something you're good at, like a hobby and find friends that like the same thing as you. You'll break out of your shell fast. It worked for me.  ;)

Answer 5

Read the following quote; find God; and develop a positive attitude and you can do anything your heart desires.

do any less and you will stay where you are.  Most important is to find God in your heart, and the rest will follow.

“And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.  When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation-some fact of my life-unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.  Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake.  Unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy.  I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.”

Please read it again, and again.  It will help if you want it.

This is the path I have followed and all this was before I dared to answer a question on Y/A.

You do not accept emails so email me if you want to learn more

Answer 6

when you have fearful thoughts, replace them with more secure thoughts. you might think, 'I am going to die if he/she doesn't go out with me". Instead say "I will be sad if so and so doesn't go out with me but I won't die". Reverse the sentences you are saying to yourself. Listen to the horrible things you say to yourself and correct them...to yourself! "I am ugly". Say "I may not be drop dead gorgeous but I certainly am not ugly. I am as attractive as most people". Or "I am not ugly because I have a nice smile". You know, listen to your horrible self thoughts and change them.

Answer 7

First of all, don't u EVER mind what other ppl think about you, cuz they dont matter, its only u.  

Answer 8

you are the exact same as me. i can like never get my hair right and i feel like i dont look good either. i feel like my problem would be solved if i felt as though i look good. "look like sh*t, feel like sh*t"

i feel that quote is very true. i feel so much better when i feel like im decent looking. when i was on vacation in japan i felt like sh*t everyday b/c my hair was too long and i couldnt control it. after i got my hair cut gelled it and all that fun stuff, i felt amazing for the rest of my trip (grls would be checking me out too now).

oh and remeber no one and i mean NO ONE is gonna look at you and think to themselves like 'wow she/hes so fugly" or anything like that. do you do that? course not! i beleived that notion for the longest time and it kept me down for a better part of my life.

hope that helped

Answer 9

As much as i'd love to tell you that your probably a beautiful girl, that has alot going for her, you won't let your self believe it. I gre up with all the same feelings, and the best decision i made was to sit down and talk to my parents, spilling out my feelings. Its felt amazing to know that there were now people who knew, and were willing to help me. at first, they set me up with some counseling, i was not too pysched at first, but it turned out not too bad. they taught great excercises i could do at home to give me a confidence boost, and i felt as if i conquer the world. Like me, you probably need to feel trust with people before you let them see you for who you really are, which is fine. You just need to be open and work on friendships a little more than others. theres plenty of people that have them same attitude towards friends, and new people. i really recommend to talk to someone, and let them know how you feel, because everyone deserves to feel beautiful, and your probably missing out on a lot letting your self feel that way.

Good luck sweetie, i really hope things get better!

Answer 10

First of all, dont compare yourself to others. Especially dont compare yourself to celebrities or models in magazines. Those people are all fake. Concentrate on what you like about yourself. Ask your close friends what they like most about you. Chances are you will learn that others think you are prettier than you think. And also get a new haircut, a cute outfit, and wear some makeup (depending on how old you are), this always gives me a self confidence boost! And always smile!  

Answer 11

I have a similar problem but I have found that I am able to speak publicly now with confidence and am much better than I was with my self-confidence because I found out what my personal qualities were.

My interest is animal rights so I decided one day to start a vegetarian notice board which moved on to a vegetarian awareness evening and then an animal rights talk with my year group (with me as the speaker!). I then was asked to participate in a comedy night at school where I did a whole stupid dance and stand-up comedy routine which everyone loved. Before I found out I was good at these things I didn't ever dare do them and I seriously regret that I never was as spontaneous as I am now.

What I'm trying to get at is that you need to find what your talent is and then let everyone know, embrace change like it's a good thing, think positive thoughts, be kind, listen to others but don't be bossed around by them, be spontaneous and then you should find that you're more self-confident. The only person who can give you more self-confidence is yourself.

Answer 12

You need a dose of HAPPY PILLS!

Answer 13

You just need to tell yourself that you deserve it and that people should feel privelged to meet a great person like yourself.  If that doesn't work get drunk!

Answer 14

Im not too confident either but for me its mainly groups of people. i'm not too bad with a couple of people around me, even if its people iv never met before but in big groups im terrible. the best thing iv found to do is not to let it worry you too much, think of what you have got, whats good about you. try writing down 10 things you like about YOU. somebody once asked me this. "what's the one thing you would do if you knew you couldn't fail?". ask your self the same thing next time your worried about doing something. also ask your self what will happen if you do fail? most of the time nothing. good luck.

Answer 15

you can work as a saleswoman

Answer 16

the most important thing is to like/love yourself

Answer 17

Well, there is a way. Actually there are a lot of ways.

I was kinda like you but then my dad signed me up for karate. It has boosted up my confidence like 110%.

It wil make you feel better about your self and let you take out all the anger inside of you, make you feel better about yourself.

I hope I helped.<3  

Answer 18

I had this problem, try forcing yourself to be more outgoing and youll build the confidence. next time your waiting somewhere strike up a conversation with a stranger. Join Clubs if you go to school, or meetup.com if ur out find people who are interested in something your interested in, and just talk to people

Answer 19

i have same problem=(

Answer 20

1st...believe you are a beautiful person, and smile when you see you selff in the mirror. don't be scared about new people, they are just friends you haven't met yet XD    & you can do anything if you just believe you can... reading the Bible could also help, God's word helps boost me up higherevery timee I read it.  

Answer 21

Mainly, work on loosing the fear of failure. It's OK to make mistakes, it's human.

There are ton's of self help books out there, go to your book store and look. They usually have a questioner before and after, so you can see how you're progressing.

DK publishing has a little hardcover book for like $10 bucks. I've used that.

Answer 22

Maybe do something different like style you hair a different way that you like it and look in the mirror and say you beautiful =]

&& find something your good at and do it more often.

also dont worry about what other people think to much just do you =]