How can i make my friend stop trying to be exactly like me??

Question

Ok i really need help one of my best friend have tried to steal my dad (lonng story) i said i was getting exotic hi-lights for my long black hair and she said OMG ME TO! so i changed it to just my jet black hair in a really awesome short cut just incase u wanted to see it http://i526.photobucket.com/albums/cc342/xshianx/riskybissnessnotthecolor.jpg and well she said yeah your right me to!! And ive had some major depperesion in my life and most people think im emo because my life relates alot to it and my style does also so from her pink i love my life myspace background it went to 100% emo and stuff with emo stuff ((i think if you admit your emo your a poser)) and well shes a really big poser and starting to be a big bother now she stole my style she dressed prep when we first met each other in 3rd grade but i didnt i was always dressed in my black graphic tee and skinny jeans it was always like that now were 13 and shes starting to dress like it too and im tired of it its like she got bored with her life so shes literally starting to copy mine my grandma invites her over all the time and she calls my grandma and grandpa,grandma and grandpa! im just really sick of it!

Answer 1

She obviously has insecurity issues and being that you're 13, that's just the age for it. The one thing that is obvious is that you don't need to stop being yourself, but you may have to distance yourself from your friend. If you want to try to save the friendship, then sit her down and tell her, "You know, you should develop your own style. I like being who I am, but I feel like you're always copying me," because maybe she doesn't realize how annoying it is. Plus, this will call her out on it. She'll either get defensive and stop or she'll get angry and keep doing it and either way, you'll see her for who she really is. Now, your gran and gram might think it's cute that she cares for them enough to call them and whatever, but you should tell them that it bothers you that she wants to copy you all the time and I'm sure they'll tell you that they probably feel sorry for her, being that she's insecure and probably needs support.

It's OK if they want to try to offer her some support, try not to let that bother you. Sometimes adults see that insecurity in younger generations and want to be there for them through the rough spots.

Just concentrate on the relationship you have with her and let her know that you need time and space to be your own person and that she should find time and space to be her own person, too. Otherwise, she'll just be a copycat forever.

And, you should feel a little good inside that someone thinks you're cool enough to emulate.

Even if she continues to copy you and you have to stop seeing her or see her less and less, then know that inside you have to be true to you and as long as you are, you'll always be happy with who you are.

Eventually you learn that you can never change a person, so control what you can -- which is yourself and your life.  

Answer 2

lol! Ohhh wow. My cousin did the same to me for like the longest time. I'd change, only for like a day or two, to see if she would also. I'd listen to country music for a lil while, and she would. Then I'd switch to Korn, and she would. Then I'd listen to rap, she suddenly liked rap. I'd dress a certain way, and she would. It was def. annoying. I agree. But to be honest the only way it stopped was after we got in a huge fight over some things she said at school. We stopped talking and she stopped following me. But I suggest talking to her. Be flat out, tell her that it seems like everything you do she does also. And it is annoying. And you want it to stop. Also your picture.... isn't just jet black hair. It has blonde in it.

Answer 3

Tell not to copy but to be herself

tell her why and how you felt

tell that it pisses you off when she acts like a clone

thats she needs her own life and to leave you alone.

but you two still friends just except who you two are

tell her that and the friendship will go far.

Twiztidforlife thinks emo is overrated, and the fact that it doesn't make any sense.

Answer 4

I think you should tell her that it is bothering you that she is copying you.She might be doing it because she admires you.But don't confront her in front of everyone or she may get really embarrassed and i don't think you want to lose a friend.You should be really calm and don't jump to conclusions about it.Find out her side of the story, maybe she felt left out somehow? maybe she finds you really cool so she wants to be like you? My advice is to just ask her why she is copying you.