How can i make my six year old baby feel helpful and worthy?

Question

for some reason she seems to be having very little confidence and a low self esteem. maybe this is an effect of her going through some issues with a girl in school, but i don't know. i always try to shower her with compliments and tell her that she deserves respect. but at a recent party, when her cousin (same aged girl) yelled at her and told her to shut up, my daughter obeyed. when they were playing with other kids, the girls got into an argument over a ken doll, and while every girl spoke her mind, my daughter began crying and walked away.also, when we were at my friends house, her mom had her grand kids and my daughter help her bake a cake. all the kids joined in, but my baby just stood there watching, kind of refusing to join in. she seems to be turning unsocial. I'm so heart broken, i don't know what to do. i know that if this continues shell end up depressed, especially due to the fact that this gets harder as she gets older.

id really appreciate any advice to help fix this situation.

thanks.

Answer 1

Aww, she is way to much like I was.She is very sensitive and doesn't like a lot of aggression.She obviously is not use to disruption of emotions which is GREAT.That means you don't do a lot of screaming around your house.You just have to keep encouraging her as you have been doing soon she will snap out of it and let them no she has had enough.You probably won't have to worry about depression as much as anger control.She will be okay nothing a little praying and constant love from mommy won't fix.Call her Princess and tell her that she is so important to you reassure her that she is beautiful,smart,and that she is blessed and she will be a productive citizen when she is an adult.When the sweet talk gets to be to much for her she will let you know. lol . Just chill out and have fun with her,she will be just fine. Byeee

Answer 2

make her the cenre of attention without her knowig it, something that will get compliments from others.for example if you are a faith filled family have her say grace each night.each bed-time have her read to you include others.have her help prepare snack each night.that kind of thing.it worked for my stepson. when i first met him he only talked to family and teachers. within 2 months of me moving in he was always btinging home friends and going to sleep-overs. he was7, so about the same age.

Answer 3

Your daughter sounds like a very sensitive soul, and that is not a bad thing at all!  I think you are doing a wonderful job encouraging her and uplifting her.

It may not be so much that she doesn;t feel worthy, as she is just shy and would rather watch for a bit before jumping in.  

My daughter is extremely outgoing.  And my problem i have with her is she is overbearing for other kids.  Children like your daughter are almost petrified of how overbearing, loud, and hyper my daughter is, that they often choose to stay on the sidelines.  I think it is normal though.  And even as adults we tend to shy away from situations where we feel uncomfortable or overstimulated.

I think just continuing to encourage her, and ask that her teachers do the same.  it may take her  while to come out of her shell, but when she does, she will do just fine.  If she chooses to be more of a wallflower though, that is ok too.  She can be very happy either way!

Best of luck to you both!

Answer 4

is this a sudden thing? or always been?

she sounds shy and sweet, but maybe its not a wont as much as a not sure how?

If its a wont, id let her take her space when watching other kids and see if eventually she is able to join

but it sounds more like a not sure how, alot of kids love to socialize but are not sure how to do it appropriately and when things become uncomfortable its easier to walk away or not join in, maybe your daughter doesnt know how to react when another girl tells her to shut up especially if shes never been exposed to this, id try some rehearsal at home, and some social scripts (or social stories) to practice what she could say to peers, have school help out too! they can help her to join in with her peers and have it not be so anxiety provoking :)