How can i make my son study without getting angry?and hitting him?

Question

he watches TV all the time though its time for his finals he is not serious about it. i have many drems atchd to him ,but he is not serious.right now though he is in 1st he may be shifted to "c" right now he is in "a" division ,i worked on him for 3 yrs from playgrp,lkg,ukg but he can't lase his shoes,wear uniform or study on his own.how he will understand the importance of studies?when?

Answer 1

It sounds as if you need to take away the TV and any other distraction he has to show him how serious you are. I make mine study in front of me . I read a book or do bills but no TV on for me either. Then as he shows improvement give him back some privileges little by little. Like an hour or two of TV a day if his work is done. Or test is studied for etc. Then if he slacks take it again. He needs to see what he is missing and what he can't afford when he gets older if he don't apply himself now.TV, video games, and phone are privileges not necessities. And you need to teach him that.Hitting is not going to fix things. Only make things worse by making him angry and hurt.

Answer 2

I can hardly understand what you're typing here; perhaps you should consider the image you're giving to your son. My parents would always tell me "Study" and then they would go sit in front of the TV, or play card games instead of doing chores or house work. The time to put pressure on them is not during finals, it's during the rest of the term. I don't think you've necessarily been a bad parent, just that you may have been inconsistent in your lessons to him. Hitting a child during studying will only give them a negative feeling towards studying and it will cause them to want it less. You should try enrolling him in a study program after school, or find a learning place (I'm not sure about places in the UK, but we've got places like Sylvan learning Center that serves to help children where parents are unable to.

Answer 3

You might need to talk to a councellor to cope with your anger issues. A self help group might be an option too, or an anger management class. An alternative might be boxing classing or step aerobics, anything where you can get rid of energy. Meditation might also help, so that you calm down a bit. If that doesn't help, you could ask your doctor for some mild herbal medication to make you less aggressive. Because if you hit your child, it's too late. You must do everything to avoid slipping in such anger phases. Maybe you should take your child to a friend or your parents for security reasons until you have yourself back under control. I'm sure you'll be fine!

Good luck and all the best!

Answer 4

Don't hit him.  Set a study time every day like one hour after school before he can watch t.v. or do anything else, have him get a homework notebook that the teacher has to sign off on every day, or at least once a week that lists his homework and if he's turned it in.  If he doesn't do it, then no t.v. for that night.  He may never understand the importance of his studies and he might use this to keep contention going with you, so quit fighting with him - set expectations and consequences and stick to those without getting all bent out of shape.  He'll either do the work, or lose his privileges - easy as that.

Answer 5

As a former teacher and a mom who home educated her children, my first suggestion would be to turn off the TV, unplug it, remove from the room in which you work, whatever it takes. Then establish a schedule  (that ends either in a privilege or a small treat. I am not familiar with the academic levels in the UK, so I do not know your child's age. Become a study buddy; ask your child to "teach" you a concept that he's comfortable with.

Lacing shoes can be taught with "successive approximations" a very big word which simply means moving backwards . You tie the shoe right up until the last step which is pulling the laces taut, and have him do this last step. Then tie up his laces until the step before this so he's doing the last two steps. Say the steps out loud, (I used the Bunny ear method. Make a bunny ear etc. Make it a bit fun with a story (down the rabbit hole and pull)

Consistency is the key. There should be no need for harsh discipline. Allow him to know he's not alone in this, that you have an ongoing interest in his school work. and PRAISE, PRAISE, PRAISE!

Best of luck to you.

Answer 6

dont expect too much from your son he will find himself sometime or the other try to convince him by explaining to him the importanc eof studying after all a man can learn from his mistakes

Answer 7

1. Maybe you need to step away for the situation for awhile to calm down or get into anger management

2.  Tutor?

3. Make it into a game for him?

Answer 8

Take away every thing and he will study if you have a computer block every site with a pass word but the study site

Answer 9

nothing is impossible when you think better for son but dont ask  work hard with him makehim your fan.

Answer 10

what is wrong with u people tonight with all these hitting questions? if you are all so stressed out try chilling out you are talking about children here not robots, some people don't deserve to be called parents, if you have dreams why don't you start living them and leave you're child alone, each child have there own times if he can't tie his shoe this week maybe he will 2 months from now, how old were u genius?

Answer 11

First of all, I hope this is a joke.  

I'm not sure if you've just conformed to the short-form internet style of writing for this particular situation, but maybe when he sees that you are serious about your own scholarly abilities he will start to take his own more seriously.  Those are some genuinely horrible grammatical skills you have shown here.

Answer 12

1. You didn't teach him right because if he can't lace his shoes and wear a uniform on his own by now, theres a problem.

2. The problem is you.

3. Don't hit him.

4. Go to rehab.

5. You can't hit your children dumbfcuk.

6. Either get rid of your tv or you should have started disciplining him earlier on in his life so he would know that he needs to study & get his S**t straight or he's going to be a loser, a straight up failure at life and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT!

Answer 13

think what ur child want

if he think tringnomatre is defecult then agen agen teech him

say him to done onle this thing

if he is gatting engry than

ask what he want to reed

than after 1/2 hour agen tringnomatre

Answer 14

Sometimes you can't. Be strong and keep trying. Try to walk away and calm down before hitting him. If you can't, you did it in his best interest. Turn off or unplug the TV. Keep it off. If he turns it on, punish him. Get rid of it, you won't die. Lead by example. But you can only provide the time, the tools, the place, and encouragement. If the horse won't drink the water don't push his head in, you have done your job. Maybe you are forcing your dreams on him. Maybe he is resisting. Talk to him. Tell him your concerns and fears for him. Share your life's experiences with him. Let him know why you care.

Answer 15

tell him if he studies for a hour then he gets to watch tv for a hour also if that doesnt work think of something he asked for that he didn't get and tell him if he gets a good grade and studies for the test he will get the thing he wanted

Answer 16

If you have discovered love,you should know how to live and bring up your child.Without love you would not respond,but would react to your child from fear or hurt.Anyways  it is better to learn art of parenting.Panchatantra speaks of a treating a child until age of as a King,then till 12 as a prince,and from there on as a friend.Just witness your emotionss(anger etc).It comes from the mother of all emotions FEAR.Go to oneness temple at Vardayyapalam.Your child will be brilliant.The cosecration starts from April 22 to 27th---2008

Answer 17

You have many dreams attached to him?..Thats a bit of pressure your applying there

You know Im 18 and in my first year of college.

I started off pretty good in school. Eager to please, quiet, never got in trouble and so on and so on

But when it came to my last year, to my major examines we have here, I got so tired of hearing, You have to study, these examines will change your life. Why aren't you studing blah blah, that I just decided, you know what F**k You, I'll do what I want.

I was hearing about exams in school and at home and I rebelled.

I stopped doing homework, stopped studying and skipped school whenever I could.

I still did ok in my exams and I got into a good college.

My advice to you is stop and step back for a moment.

If not your son will just end up doing the same thing as I did

And if he does there is no coming back from that, no matter what anyone says you have lost his interested and you have become the nag in his life.