How can i make this story more interesting?

Question

http://www.xanga.com/StarrCrossedLovver

here is the link to the story, dont be shy, if you dont like it tell me why, and if you have a cool way to make it different i would appreciate it!

i dont just want to make it a cliche romance story, but i still want it to revolve around the boy and girl

Answer 1

First, learn how to rewrite your work. It will begin to flow better and the choppy style will go away. Second, describe actions in the narrative and put feelings and thoughts into dialogue.

Dont say I dint help