How can i open up more with the fiancee's family?

Question

I've been with my fiancee for 2 years now and we are getting married next may. the problem (and he cant stand it) is that I'm quiet, shy and to myself.. how can i open up to his very-open family who i have nothing in common with? i find myself having nothing at all to say and when i do say something it comes out stupid and then I'm in the same predicament.

Answer 1

sleep with his dad!!!lmao

Answer 2

Maybe talk more and hang out more with him and his family!!

Answer 3

Although you may be shy, I'm sure you are not so shy in situations where you feel most comfortable.  Maybe you are so worried about looking dumb that you actually set yourself up for it.  In my experience, people who are very open are also very accepting.  You should put your faith in the fact that your fiancee chose you to be with and if he adores you, they surely have to find something loveable about you also.  Maybe you can find some kind of activity to do with them like getting together and playing cards and boardgames.  Maybe bowling or mini-golf.  The more time that you spend with them, the more you should become naturally comfortable with them. Maybe try to do things with them that they enjoy or introduce them to something that you like.  It will open a new door into your in-law relationship that will build a bond between you and them that wasn't there before you came into the family. Try to not to worry yourself so much and try to concentrate on the moment.  Even if you don't ever become outspoken, you will be a good balance to your fiancee and his family.

Best of luck!

Answer 4

I help my fiance's mother clean the kitchen up after meals. That's usually our time to talk. Just start with: "Can I help you do something?" If you do nothing else but move around the kitchen at first, it'll eventually lead to conversation.  Good Luck!!  

Answer 5

Ok so you sound exactly like me! I am so quiet and shy. I have been that way around his family for the whole 5 years we've been together. We're getting married next June :) But finally here in the past few months I've been able to open up more. I look at it like this, they love him and obviously love and accept me since they have allowed me into their family. So I just decided I need to be myself! I still don't talk a lot. I am usually found sitting beside my fiance smiling at everything somebody says. However, I've also gotten to know them and their interests as well so I can strike up a small conversation every now and again. But they know that I am a shy person and thats just my personality. I am really laid back and just like to listen instead of dominating the conversation. It's ok! Tell your fiance that it is just who  you are and they obviously don't mind it since they are letting you into the family. (My fiance was the same way for the first little bit) Good luck with the wedding! And remember, just be you! Congrats! :)

Answer 6

Then we  must be twins, I have the same problems with my fiance families and I'm just a quiet person anyways. He used to get mad but we have now been together for 5 yrs and its still the same and we plan on getting married in march. I just told him he was gonna have to except me for me, its not like im being mean i;m just queit as long as i speak and in respectful and can do some small talk he should be satisfied, he not real happy about it now but he respects me.

Answer 7

show em your hooters..

Answer 8

Ah, I.m quite too, so they should understand. Just attend more functions and go over there when there is only a few people there. I find I struggle when there is a lot of people, (this is in general, as my fiance's family is great) and people tend to talk for the sake of talking and nothing gets through anyway. So just be there, and hang out in the group. If there is a party do not go into the corner, you need to be amonst the action.

Understand what the are talking about and make up anything, or just nod.

Answer 9

I can completely relate to you. I have also been with my fiance for 2 years and extremely shy around his family. Even though you might think you don't have anything in common with his parents you probably do. Sit down with your fiance and learn the ins and outs, likes and dislikes of his parents. This way you know what to avoid saying. Or even better, you sit down with each of his parents or invite them to a kind of "get to know you better" lunch without your fiance. It might seem a little weird at first, but they will see you have a great heart and just want to get to know them better. Also you can get them involved in the wedding planning (if you dare!). This is a good idea only if they are not too pushy.

I have other advice too, email me if you want more. I wish you the best of luck!