How can i stop my 7 year old from having behavior issues?

Question

My 7 year old is out of control. Has behavior issues, and issues at school. I need help. I was looking at boarding schools, and boot camps. I am at my wits end here. Please, help!

Answer 1

First, try spending more time with him/her. Then, find out if there is a specific reason he's acting out at school, like a friend making him/her act out, or do things they wouldn't normally do. You don't specify what behavior issues, but I'm assuming it's lying (totally normal), ignoring (also normal, aggravating, but normal), and backtalking (actually just trying to voice his/her opinion). Right now you need to have lots of patience, make sure you're not yelling, and try to sit down and actually listen to your child. They're going through alot at this age...going from being child to pre pre pre teen, dealing with peer pressure, making their own decisions, and living with consequences from the decisions they make. It's alot to deal with.

My suggestion?? MORE PATIENCE!! Remember what it was like for you to teach your child how to make those decisions, and how not to make the wrong decisions. This is the time now that your child is using those skills you taught him/her...you've got to let him/her learn! Part of this time is learning when to back off, and let them mess up and learn. That's very hard!

good luck, and I wish you the best!

Answer 2

Just spank the h**l out of him! If you let it go he's gonna grow up to an a$$hole that noone likes an friends will only come in the form of dug users and inmates.

Answer 3

My 7 year old is having behavior issues and we took him to a therapist and found out through a lot of tests that he has asbergers syndrome, dystymia, anxiety, and ADHD.  He is currently on meds for the ADHD and still sees his therapist for the other behaviors.

One thing that we have tried is a book called 123 Magic.  It seems to be working.  The meds are working as well. I do want to say that I fought my husband on medicating him until I spoke with other parents in the same situation.  I also try to explain to him that what he is doing is making me sad and hurting my heart.

I hope this helps and I want you to know that you are not alone.  Good luck

Do not spank him it will make things worse.

Answer 4

First, ignore those neanderthals who advocate spanking - it may be effective in the short run, but it won't teach him anything more than to behave to avoid being hit.   He needs to learn the REASONS for behaving well, and that only comes from reasoning and discussion, with a healthy dose of love.

Second, get yourself and his father (if he's around) into a parenting class.   It will be the best single thing you've ever done for yourself and your child.    He doesn't need a boarding school, and I would NEVER send a kid to a boot camp - that would totally break down the parent-child bond; not too unlike having your kid sent to prison.   Having said that, if you don't learn how to parent him, then a trip to boot camp might be in his future, as a court-ordered last resort before going to the Youth Authority (or "reform school" as they used to call it).

Answer 5

Boy, you got some pretty horrible advice.

If your son is truly out of control, you need professional help.  Meet with his school counselor and come up with a remediation plan (which may involve a psychologist).  Corporal punishment and/or just hoping the behavior will correct itself are terrible ideas.  

You need a professional to determine the cause of the behavior before it can be changed.  Get help now.

Answer 6

Prizes every time he does something good..

Punishment every time he does something bad.

Prize:  Toys,  Candy.

Punishment:  Sit in the corner,   or take away all his things.

Answer 7

Try a child psychologist.  Maybe there is a deep reason for the behavior.  Not that its the answer, but medication can sometimes help if other methods do not.  

Sending your child away will only anger then towards you.

Call a doctor or school councelor and see if there is a professional in your area to talk to.

Also tell your child things need to change before he is taken away from home.

Good luck!

Answer 8

spank him.

Answer 9

first, i need to ask does he get spanked. Does he know that you are the boss. Boarding schools and boot camps  may not be what he needs. If he is out of control he is either not getting enough attention, or there are repressed memories in his head that cause him to act out this way.

Answer 10

Put  him or her in after school activities.

Like soccer, football, baseball, basketball, gymnastics, swimming classes,Drawing classes music classes

anything that will keep him or her mind busy

Kids have lots of energy they need to use their energy in some thing like sports.

Find a hobby he or she likes.

After sport activities will help and probably keep him or her from getting into trouble.

boot camp wont help a 7 yr old nor will boarding schools.He or she will probably be upset if you put them in boarding school or boot camp and will think you abandoned them.

you will have more problems with your child as they get older if you put he or she in boot camp or boarding school.

my nieces are in  karate classes and one is in baseball

the other is in basketball by the time they come home and do their home work they are too tired and some go to sleep.

Answer 11

Whip her/his ***!!

Answer 12

beat them.

Answer 13

Try to act the way that he should act, keep your cool and give him lots of love.  He's just going through a stage.  Be there for him.

Answer 14

actually have you ever watched that super nanny show on TLC well anyways she says when your children or child gets out of control you should get down to their level face to face tell then why you are down at their level tell them why they are being punished then sit them away from everybody or in a corner..... she says if you scream or yell at your child when they do wromg thing yea they know your mad but they also have just learned that you cant take it and they sense you have lost control which makes perfect sense really

Answer 15

Sell him to the highest bidder - just make sure the signs state "all sales final, buy as-is"

Answer 16

I feel for you. This must be very difficult for you. Have you been to the doctor to get a professional opinion on the matter? Have you tried altering her diet? there are so many different factors into why children misbehave. The most important thing is to stay consistent with discipline. Make the rules clear and don't allow for variations until your child's behaviour shows improvement. Stay firm and decide on a punishment. Reward your child for good behaviour.

Most of the time when children act out it is when they are seeking attention. Your child may feel that his bad behaviour is getting attention and that is his payoff.

Please don't send your child to boarding school. You are his parent and you are the one who loves him so why should a stranger have to teach him how to act. Even if you cannot cope with him remember how much you love him and hope that its just a stage and he will grow out of it. Get a babysitter when you feel you need a break and seek support from your family and friends.

Answer 17

its a stage, make sure he goes outside a lot too to get his energy out. then i think he'll be less annoying cause he's tired... then see a doctor about ADD

Answer 18

why is it that a normal child gets in trouble and the answers are beat them and  a child that has a little issue with the way they look its give more attintion or affection or the parents a bad parent for looking for a boot camp or boarding school?

its funny how the answers change. anyway,  maybe a school counselor will help or a social worker. the best advise i got was to get therapy for ourselves also, to help with our stress as parents.

good luck!

Answer 19

As this is your offspring, you (and your spouse) are the responsible authority in your household. Helping them under the concept of authority is an important life lesson. When they grow up and leave your household, the "new authorities" that will be over them (bosses, police, judges, etc.) are not going to be nice like "mommy." Read over the outline below and give it careful thought before proceeding.

New Rules

1. Do exactly what you say you will do from now on. If you tell your seven year-old he will get a time-out for being disobedient, carry out it out! If you have a significant other, they must be on board too- no exceptions.

2. Develop an action plan for how to punish misbehavior, and reward good behavior- write it down, then make copies. The one that has worked well for me in the past looked something like this is:

Infractions:

Not doing homework

Not doing your chores

(and so on)

Punishment:

First Infraction: No TV for a week

Second Infraction: A monetary fine AND First Infraction Penalty

Third: 300-line repetition, i.e., "I will never throw rocks at cars again as long as I live." Can't go to bed until it's done.

Fourth and subsequent: Double and Triple the above.

Ultimate punishment (if refusing to accept other punishments): stay in your room and don't come out until you are ready to accept responsibility, apologize and make amends for your behavior (I called it "reconciliation").

Buy a bulletin board mount it in the hall. Put each child's name on it. Each time they go a week without punishment, they get a happy face next to their name. They trade in happy faces for prizes mentioned below. Also, put achievements on the board to highlight the outcomes of good behavior.

Rewards:

Two Happy Faces: $10 allowance, Three: Movies, Four: Pizza, etc.

3. Sit down and talk to the family and let them know that the "old" sheriff is gone and that there's a new sheriff in town: "Mommy Tough Love," and if you live under this roof, you're under "Tough Love."  Pass out the announcements, go over every point, bulliten board, etc. Put a copy of the announcement on the fridge and one in each bedroom. Removing or altering the announcement in any way is an infraction.

4. Sit down and talk with your seven year old in a quiet setting where there will be no disruptions. Ask what is causing this behavior, and what can be done to help, because he/she will be in hot water very soon if that aren't positive changes in behavior right away. Have someone else they like or respect very much reinforce what you have said.

This process seemed to work well with both of my youngin's. One's graduated from college just a few years ago and the other one's in her sophomore year. They laugh about it now.

Answer 20

Start taking away his toys and priveleges. Be very strict about it.  Sit him down and tell him that you have a new plan, and he will be punished every time he acts up. He must know what his consequences will be, and they must be enforced every time.

Answer 21

Nowa Days you have to get creative with your  discipline. If he like treats make him earn them or something that he likes My son is an avid pokemon fanatic and he has to get good reports at the end of every week to get a small $5 pack of pokemon cards. My step-daughter is 9 and she loves Hanna Montanna So she has to get good reports to get something . If that isn't working try adding extra responsibilities.  Just use your brain the answer is in there find what peaks his interest and use it to your advantage;  Maybe he likes being distruct ful so if he's good buy him c**p to break.  Giving up is not an option. That is your child and he disserves every ounce of strength and love you can muster and thensome. Kids are not easy, but if everyone gave up where would we be?

Answer 22

sending your child away will not help. All It will do is make them feel abandoned. Have you had him checked by a behavoural psychologist? Look at the additives and colours in his diet. I have given you a link that you may find useful. I know many people who have used it and the behaviours of their children improved immensly