How can my husband and I explore a polyamorous relationship?

Question

We are both accepting to having s*x and a boyfriend or girlfriend withe everyone's knowledge. We are not sure where to start. Again, we are new to this and want to try it out.

Answer 1

Why did you get married if you want to do this? Have you considered what will happen if one of you does become emotionally involved with the new partner? What if one of you finds a new partner & the other doesn't? This is a very dark & dangerous path you're exploring. Think this through carefully before taking another step.Many marriages have ended this way.

Answer 2

If you two want to have s*x with other people, you shouldn't have gotten married. Marriage is about a relationship (whether emotional or physical) with ONE other person. You made vows, and no matter what you both agree to, you really should think about it. Diseases, pregnancy, mistrust, divorce... all this can result just because you want to do something different with your s*x life.

Answer 3

Good luck! An open marriage will kill your marriage! Hope the s*x is worth it!

Answer 4

so both of you have a mutual agreement to this right?

maybe you could go out with your girlfriends and if you get asked out on a date, let your husband know that you are going on a date or if he doesn't care to know then you don't have to. but i think it would be better if you let each other know.

basically like being single, but you're married at the same time :D

Answer 5

I don't personally know anyone in this situation, but googled it and came up with this website: http://www.polyamorysociety.org/

Maybe it's a place to start?

Answer 6

Start by finding said boyfriend/girlfriend. You might be new to polyamory, but you're experienced at meeting people. Well, I assume you're experienced enough: you met each other. This is not really different.

Answer 7

My suggestion is DON"T!

Its called cheating and if you both do not have enough respect for yourself and your marriage, then divorce. People who do this make me sick!

Answer 8

Whatever you do, do not start something with any of your friends. Find strangers.  Otherwise word may get around and feelings may get too hurt.

I would start by doing some cyber chatting and web cam s*x, just to make sure you really want your husband looking at other women.

Answer 9

look on the web...  there are sites for that.

Answer 10

Call me ;)

Answer 11

I would suggest looking for a couple who "swings"  you know "swingers". you could ask and experienced couple how to get started and learn more on how it could and might affect your relationship.

But I'm not saying go for it ...you could be sorry in the end.

Answer 12

There are several sites and national organizations that can help you along the path you're seeking.  Regardless of what some on here have said, just make sure you're aware of the following:

Polyamory  is NOT swinging.

Polyamory  is NOT a fling with other people

Polyamory is being able to enter into a loving relationship with more than one person.

That soapbox being said, I hope you find what you want.  Just remember that honesty is paramount in all of this.  That inlcudes with your friends.  If the subject comes up, be frank with them and let them know of your leanings and lifestyle.  If they're really your friends they'll help you as much as they are able.

Answer 13

why did you get married if you wanted to sleep around? you could have stayed single and you wouldn't have to ask where to start!

Answer 14

use condoms