How can we get custody and child support?

Question

My finance has a 3 year old daughter, he was with the mother for five years and has been broken up with her since the his daughter was about one.

She doesn’t not work and hasn’t in years she lives with her father. She is out every night, and drink and smoke with her daughter around. She pose on the internet nearly naked. She took my finance to court before they were broken up. She recently had another child and took that man to court when she was engaged and living with him and the baby was nothing but 6 weeks old. Since the spring she has had numerous men. She lives my fiancé’s daughter with her friends that do not look after her well at all. For example they take her camping and get drunk and let her play by fires. They posted pictures of this type of stuff on there myspace. We have repeated tried to enroll her in preschool and daycare because her mother say she has no one to watch her to find a job.

We want to get custody of her, we usually have her from Thursday night to that following Tuesday afternoon every other week. We are constantly buying her cloths and other things like hygiene products because the cloths she comes with are extremely to small.

This girl and I have also had our problems she started emailing right after we got engaged and her older sister started emailing saying she was going to “jump me”.

I have also been accused of things like talking to the father of her other child when I don’t know him at all.

I want to know what do we need to take custody, and support our evidence?

And should be wait a couple months to build up more proof she is unfit?

And also when my fiancé was 18 he receive a misdemeanor for stole property, he got 3 years probation no time served will that effect him he is 26 now?

(i already have him documenting when he picks and drops her off we just recent started keeping recpits for everything we buy and things we do with her i am saving her picuters and such off of myspace with her and her friend going out and drinking and smoking around her and her posing nude on myspace )

PS we do live in northern califronia

Answer 1

Keeping notes of when you have her and things that are happening around her - is a good place to start.

I would call social services and report to them that you fear for the girls safety.  They will intervene if they see a cause for concern.  

Keep your focus on the child not on her mother - she has a right to behave however she likes - but she doesn't have the right to subject her child to unsafe environments.

Get a good lawyer....

It's good that you are having the child stay with you guys often and if you could then maybe you should offer to take her more.... this is all good for your fiancee's case for custody.

Be prepare for a rough tough and tiring journey ahead.  But never lose sight of the goal.  

Good Luck x

Answer 2

Get a LAWYER! (Family Law specialist)  

Answer 3

so far you are taking all the right procedures as far as evidence goes. now what you need to do is get a good lawyer and file for custody. keep documenting everything and taking pix. show how she comes over in clothing that are too small and what not. what he did when he was 18 should not reflect on him now.

*you two living together has NOTHING to do with it especially since you two are engaged*

EDIT: here is a website that tlls you what type of evidence you should gather, good luck!

http://www.ehow.com/how_8981_gather-evid...

Answer 4

You need to get a good lawyer that specializes in family matters, and custody.  Save your pennies, it will cost you..

Answer 5

You are doing everything right.  Your boyfriend should and needs to get custody.   It would help to call Child Protective Services on the mom so you have something to show in court.

But remember, your going with a guy who picked this kind of girl.   And, if you marry him you will be stuck with his kid and ex-girlfriend the rest of your life.

And your living together with this guy?    That is not going to look good that he is bringing his daughter home to a live in girlfriend.

Sorry, but think about it.

Answer 6

WOW! sounds like my problems.

My husband and i have talked to lawyers about this. Basically the mom has to do a lot to lose her kid. Record everything, save any e-mails pictures or anything.

My step son was beaten up at his moms house by her b/f. shes gotten liek 4 owi's with him in her car. and has done some of the stuff u have said, still its not enough for us to get full cusotdy. Its a shame.

You basically need to prove she nots a good mother. The evidence you collected seems like enough, but im sure the courts wont agree. I would wait and get as much as possible. If shes calling you known stop. Get phone records of it. Get anything you can, you need to save that child!

Answer 7

Wow... I went through almost the same thing! You need to get legal advice. It is going to be a long and expensive journey. As for child support, I wouldn't bother. You have to act in the interest of the child and the judge will frown on the money issue. Good for you on taking notes and documenting. But you need to write down the date, time, AND weather! (July 11th, 1:30pm, partly sunny, 85 degrees) Believe me, it makes a difference. As far as your fiance and his record, I would not worry about it...that was 8 years ago. But you have to be perfect from now on!! And remember, the key word for your case is STABILITY. You want a stable environment for your child. Your lawyer will most likely tell you to go to mediation before hand. So I would get the mediation ball rolling, then contact a lawyer. Do NOT say a thing about money in mediation.....huge advice. STABILITY, STABILITY!! And keep your cool, Let the mother explode in front of the mediator, not you.  God, I feel for you! Good luck and God Bless......