How come I am so self conscience about myself?(there is a lot to read in this question but please help me)

Question

THIS IS GOING TO BE A LITTLE LONG SO JUST READ THE WHOLE THING AND HELP ME OUT PLEASE!!!!! i dont' know if its because i have been made fun of ever since the 4th grade and it didn't settle down until like the 8th grade i don't know. But i am so self conscience i always care about what people think about me. Like in 7th grade someone was like even though your older than me i am more mature than you. but i thought to myslef what actually defines the word mature i mean really. This person was not more mature than me he really wasnt. However he was one of the popular kids but he acted wierd. It seems that always in my life the people who did stupid stuff and made fools of themselves were the most popular and all the girls liked them. But as for me i was always either made fun of and was never really popular. I mean i got sorta popular in 8th grade but nobody really liked me liked i was always just known as the friend, the nice person, the pushover, the "g*y Kid". I mean people always think iw as g*y but i don't know why just because i talk a little different or maybe i have my own sense of fashion people think its wierd. but like the other day me and some people i know went to the beach. One was my best friend but i cant tell him like all my secrets because of what he will think but we have known each other forever and do everything together. the other another one was sorta my friend but i think badly about this person he is popular. and this other person i don't even know he is just so wierd but he is also popular(go figure) but my best friends is good friends with them. and my best friend has his counsins down and i was talking to them ya know just being nice and i really didnt want to join the other two kids because they were being wierd. But then this group of girls came up and i was over with my best friends cousins talking away from them. Then the group of girls called my name because the people i know told them about me. I went up to them and guess what they said your friends said that you were g*y but the girls also said that they know i'm not even though they don't even know me. I don't know if they were just saying that or really meant it. So right away without me knowing they told them i was g*y. I was like what the F*** where do you get the right to tell people who i am. Earlier that day at the beach these other girls came up to us and i was with the group this time and asked for our numbers. So i gave them our numbers and i guess i was standing funny idk i dont think i was but anyway later we were throwing around a football and then the wierd one just said to the other one i think badly about how funny i was standing and how wierd or g*y i was. I was like ***** why do talk about me like that. Am i so self conscience of myslef because of stuff like this i just always keep my guard up. I don't trust anybody i have big trust issures you thin you can trust people but you cant and that becasue of maybe of how i acted before it has made me a lot shyer and quieter because i dont' want people to think bad about me. NOW i know i have said a lot but just please help me out. Why am i so self consciece???

Answer 1

Ah ha........I actually lost track of it sometime... had to read it again...

I think at your age it is natural to be Self Conscience...:-).. even a small issue will be blown up....

I think you are a very good person..trusting others is very difficult thing and i think you are wise and mature to have that prinicple in life....

About your dress sense: stick to what you feel like it..if you like that way you dress, then who cares what other people think...maybe they are just jealous...

about the g*y thing: you are what you think you are... did you understand??...i confused myself i think.... see its like this... when i was your age, i was like: are people looking at me, are they passing some comments, are they making fun of me...but now i look back and feel it was so funny the way i acted.... i think it helped me make the person i am today... which is confident, self sufficient and worthy of the love and care of people who matter to me...the most important being God...

Dont pay too much attention to such things... there are loads of bigger things to come...i dont know how you will react when that happens... but look at it this way... how you handle the situations now will surely help you in the long run... over-reacting and all that is fine now... but as you grow older your patience and perservence will be looked upto and appreciated by other people.. if not with them....

You are in school for a purpose, that is to achieve something... concentrate on that.. have fun with friends... dont pay heed to the things which will not benifit you...

Have fun,.. keep faith in God...

if you have any questions i am available at [e-mail]

Cheers,

D

Answer 2

this took a while to read, but you already know the answer. when people tease you, you become self conscience. it's normal. just try your best to ignore it.

Answer 3

You already know the reasons why your self conscious and its purely because of other peoples unfair criticism. Its difficult accepting yourself for the person you are, but as you already know its not your appearance or your voice or how you stand that people should be making a judgement of you as a person, its whats inside the package, the one thing thats true for all humans is we have emotions and are sensitive to how we are treated, what makes it harder is your young and you see others having some thing you feel you don't, but honestly they have nothing more to offer than you, yourself, use this as a life lesson so that you have compassion for others, as for building your self esteem look for mentors who have created miracles through self belief and take those ideals and make a good valuable life for yourself. Take heart, your not the only one who has these feelings threw life, but you are the one who gets to make the choice of how you deal with it, stand tall and be proud of the person that you are, you are totally unique to this world. God bless you xx

Answer 4

this is def. a big reason why you are! i don't blame you though, i would be too. but you can't let stuff like that get to you. i know.. easier said, then done.

but you just have to have self-confidence and people saying you're g*y won't effect a females opinion of you.. bc confidence is the best accessory. and when guys see you with a girl, of course they'll know you're not g*y.

this may sound stupid.. but i had very low self-esteem, and a book helped me out.

the 7 habits of a highly effective teen.

it makes you respect + love you're self.. which in return others will too, and won't have to be pathetic and talk about you.

and that might help too, just think.. they have to be the losers and make them selves look better by talking bout someone else. atleast you're better then that.

Answer 5

some people are horrible aren't they. Everybody has this problem in llife, i did.

People will say things about other people, to show themselves off and to show the person thier picking on, that there better then them.

Fact is, people who pick on other people have something to hide, something there ashamed off that they dont want other people to know. whether is family issues, gf issues or being self concious about it. So they become a character and unfortuantly a mean one, in which they pick who they think the weakest person is and draw attention to that person so no attention is bought to themselves.

it' sad and its pathetic.  

unfortunatley for you, they have chosen to pick on you. Calling you g*y etc, is just something that they know will irritate you  and that will entertain them.

Confront whoever is saying this about you. But dont get back at them., it will make things worse.

I was picked on for a year by this guy. called me names, threw s*** etc and it wasn't till i confronted him (with some help) that he backed off.

Dont wait to long like i did lol.

Dont let them get to you tho. The more self concience, irritated, shy etc you look, the more they will target you.

Act confident and proud. People will always be mean but you have to stand up for yourself and show them that they picked the wrong person to mess with.

Good luck!!