How come no matter what i do, I'm always in the wrong???

Question

So, no matter what i say or do, I'm always wrong or its never good enough. I live with my aunt, shes always comparing me to her daughters, I asked her to stop comparing me to them but she wont. today i told my mom she needed to quit drinking and stuff, and she was like I'm the adult. I told my aunt what she said, and she was like, Well she is right she is an adult. But under any other circumstances, my aunt would agree. It drives me crazy, and when ever i ask her to stop making comments that drive me crazy, she once again makes it sound like I'm in the wrong, by saying stuff like, "Your driving your self crazy", "Jamie and Melissa never did that when they were your age",but i really don't care, ive been different from them for the last 12 year and ill be different for the rest of them. Me and my aunt never see eye-to-eye, can i please have help, i just don't know how else to get along

Answer 1

well no one ever see eye-to-eye. thats just the way things are. you said you already talked to your aunt, but maybe sit down with her and have a real talk. (which i hate doing that sort of thing) but sometimes thats what it takes. whenever she makes the sort of comments that you said say something like "well im me and you cant change that" or just tell her that she needs to listen for once. sometimes you have to be straight forward. now your mom on the other hand she may be the adult and when you talk to her about smoking and drinking there is usually nothing you can do. you cant control it. just tell her often that you love her and maybe every now and then bring it up.

you're not the one in the wrong. you're doing everything right, sometimes people just have a hard time listening and they only tell them self what they want to know. they onyl listen to themself sometimes, not others. maybe your aunt doesnt want to accept the fact that sometimes you can be right too.

Answer 2

Sounds like you need to find some friends who like you for just being you! Your home life seems rather worrying. Your Aunt obviously has issues but don't let her 'glass half empty' attitude alter your outlook on life. We are all good at something and if we work hard we achieve what we set out to do. I was also labelled a failure but I proved all my critics wrong by sheer hardwork and determination. Have faith in your own ability and don't take to heart other people mis-guided advice. Enjoy life and try to keep the philosophy of 'glass half full' - Hope this helps :~)

Curly Girly

Answer 3

They are never going to change....so quit trying to please them. Live your own life and wait until you are old enough to get out of the house*

Answer 4

You probably have heard this a million times before but my answer is difficult as it is you will have to ignore your aunt.  You will never compare to her daughters .  I am sure they are not perfect, probably far from that but she will not see it any other way.  You are who you are and you cannot change that.  Don't change for anyone.  I don't see anything wrong with you, you seem to be pretty upfront and a very upbeat girl.  I know that it must be difficult to see your mom drink and true as it may be that she is an adult she doesn't act like one.  I am sorry for all you are going through but rest assured that with time your aunt will see how good of a person you truly are.  Now I think she is trying to take your moms place and trying to show you her way of doing things.  Everyone as their own way, if you were my daughter I would show you things my way, your mom shows you things her way and your aunt does so as well.  You are not your aunts child so she will find fault to make you see her own way.  I am sure that you see her way sometimes but she is so set in her ways that she doesn't even hear what you said.  I am sorry for everything you are going through.  I know it is extremely difficult.  But hang in there when you come of age you can do as you will.  In the meantime do you have a dad close by.  Maybe you can talk to him or go visit sometimes.  It would give you a much needed break.  Good luck to you.  I will keep you in my prayers.