How come no one wants to get married and stay married!?!?

Question

I am divorced. He was over in Iraq and decided he could commit adultery with another married woman he worked with and I wouldn't find out when he got home. I found out while he was over there and filed papers.

Both men and women do not take the time to get to know each other before they “commit” to each other OR they don’t show their true colors until the end.

We have a child and it’s even harder to get with someone that has the same beliefs as I do.

It seems like “cheating” is a normal thing out here in California. I don’t think it’s cool or funny and I blame the media, and the “no fault” California court system.

I feel that I should stay single forever!

Answer 1

Some people can't stay committed to one person, some people can. Not everyone cheats when they are married, my parents have been married for 46 years and still happily in love. I've been married almost 12 years and very happy. I know it feels like no one can stay committed to marriage right now because you are going or just went through a divorce and I am sorry. It feels like you can't trust anyone. In time your hurt and pain will go away, I promise. Good luck.

Answer 2

Iknow I use to live in California and my ex cheated on me I'm in search of that true love that is out there somewhere waiting for me to find them....I enjoyed the commitment to one person....

Answer 3

i think not all people wanted to have falled relationship. perhaps i believe u have to know the person well before the promise of marriage. commitment should be between two lovers not only in love but also mature (emotionally, physically and spiritually). maturity comes when he or she agrees to a monogamous relationship.

just my pov. thanks everyone reading this. =)

Answer 4

You are right............Now to find Mr. Right

Answer 5

since he cheated on your then he wasn't right for you and he showed that right off the bat. let him go live your life for you and not to be fighting with some one that doesn't care about your feelings. good luck to you and your future

Answer 6

I feel you girl. Its the same way here in Jersey. I haven't been married and probably won't because guys cheat can't stay with one person.

Answer 7

No Peekaboo, cheating has nothing to do with the Media, or California laws. When a man or woman want to cheat, they will. They can be anywhere, in any part of the world. So please don't let his cheating make you feel less a person. I would say that any woman or man that cheats on a spouse has no moral values. I feel certain one day you will find someone good and kind, that holds the same beliefs as you, and will love your child as his own. Just do yourself and your little one a favor, and don't jump into marriage again until you feel that you really can trust this person. Just watch him, observe him, and listen very intently to what ever he may be talking about. And Peekaboo, keep in mind that you are a beautiful person and a good person, and that your husband is the one who destroyed this marriage, not you. And one more thing don't ever use the excuse that the war in Iraq caused this, it didn't. This man and this woman had it in them to cheat, whether they were in Iraq or not. Those two will never get together permanently, and chances are they will cheat in there next relationship. You take your baby and move on, and have a great life. I promise you that your life will get better, the sadness will go away, and the animosity you are feeling right now for him will fade. We must never live with hatred in out heart, it will only bring us down and keep us down. And from one woman to another stay focused, and stay positive.

I care about you, and the little one.

Hugs from Fort Hood, Texas

Retired military Texas girl