How do I Tell my Friend I would not like to Visit him or Hang around His Neighborhood?

Question

I have been friends with my friend, Chis for a couple years now.

This summer we have been hanging out a lot more often. Usually we hangout near my neighborhood or go to downtown to a club or whatnot.

He has recently moved into his own apartment and keeps begging me to come see it, visit it, and go with him to a fun bar nearby.

The problem is that he lives in a dangerous neighborhood that is 100% black. (he is black)

He has grown up in the same neighborhood his whole life (just his own apt now) so he is just used to it I guess.

I would not really feel safe or comfortable going to visit him, or especially hanging out in a bar in his neigborhood.

Is it rude to tell him the truth?

I am a young white female, and race has never been an issue in our friendship. I would hate it to start now

Answer 1

well it depends how old you are. if you are young, i would say tell him your parents will not let you travel. if not, i would be honest and just say that while it shouldn't matter and it sucks, you feel like something bad could happen to you because you are a young female. Try not to include race in it, but more of a petite women role....he should get the hint but it might be a little less rude then coming out and saying its because I'm white...

Answer 2

well, you are making it about race to a degree. Best policy is honesty and you need to tell him. You could come to a compromise, have him pick you up and bring you there. You still need to tell him, otherwise he will think you are judging him.  

Answer 3

How do you know the neighborhood is dangerous?  I think that would be kind of rude to tell him that. You might lose a friend over it. Maybe just go hang out one time and see how it is. If something bad happens, then you will have a legitimate reason to not want to hang out in his neighborhood. Maybe you can just hang out at his apartment. You can have drinks there and watch movies.