How do I avoid holding a grudge against my boyfriend?

Question

I love my boyfriend and I don't want anything to get in the way of being with him. Sometimes he does things that bother me and I end up holding a grudge about it. I don't see our relationship sustaining if I continue to be like this. I find it hard to see how marriages can last through serious problems, but someday I would like to be able to say that our relationship can endure anything. How do I get over things so I can let it go?

Answer 1

You just have to learn some arguments aren't worth having and some grudges are silly to hold.

If you are that way, then your boyfriend may not want to be with you in the long run.

Also, marriages like that NEVER last.

It's immature.  

Answer 2

It depends what you have grudges about.

If it is simple things like not getting what you want on TV for example, then it's a case of working on your immaturity.

If it's a case of things that do hurt your feelings and are his bad attitudes for example, phoning other women, playing with your feelings, not doing his share etc. then these kind of things you have a right to confront him about.

If you are bothered by things he does that are his bad attitudes, don't just surpress your feelings and pretend you feel ok - you have to work them through, or they will destroy the relationship.  It depends if he has the maturity to listen and respond.