How do I become my old self?

Question

Okay, don't get me wrong, I like who I am...but I want to become...better. I guess that would be the word for it. How on earth would I go about changing my personality? Okay, this is strange....I know. But I used to be a completely different person than I am now, and I miss that person. But I'm lost in how to get back to her. I know that she's still inside me somewhere...but I just don't know. Many things in my life are reason for my change, but that was in the past...now that I would definately benefit from being her again, and am allowd to be her again, I don't know how to be. I used to be very self confident, happy go lucky, wacky, fun girl. All the time. I'm still self confident, but to an extint....and I'm happy, but not happy go lucky...I can still get wacky...but its very seldom. I used to be the life of the party, the one that people called on...the one out of the group of friends that everyone expected to pull others out of a slump...if you needed to laugh, you looked to me...if you needed to cry, you looked to me...I was really nice, but I had a tough exterior, and didn't really let stuff bother me. Over the years I went through some hard life lessons, and they really changed me. They broke down my walls...instead of a tough exterior, I feel like I'm working with an egg shell, and any tiny tap will crack it. I'm touchier than I used to be...I can be a real b**** if you cross me wrong...and honestly I hate it. I want to be happy and be able to make everyone happy at the drop of a hat again...and I definately want to lose these darn mood swings...gurr... I'm not old enough to have lost who I was yet.... I just miss who I used to be...how do I find her again?

Thank you in advance if you can help me.

Answer 1

Have a quiet affair

Answer 2

You are like me and maybe many more besides people shouldn't change you,its only yourself that has to do that, people today should take you as they see you without any malices or judgments.

Answer 3

Well, how about analyzing yourself honestly, [ which sounds that you are honest]. First of all write out two or three lists, FIRST, Name what things you have lost in your personality., Then write down what you like to achieve, then what can be positive actions you can achieve.

To me i feel you have lost the softness you use to have through tough times in the past.To achieve that  and get that back you could be stressed and haven't got the patience, Stop, smell the roses, take a deep breath and say I can do this.

Maybe you might need a tonic  or your diet might have changed.

Defiantly get a good multivitamin. Be patient and say to yourself BE HAPPY,and it will come back, you are half way there, you can see there is a problem. Good luck remember Be happy  

Answer 4

think of good...

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=fmIhz3H2q4...

Answer 5

Sounds like you've got alot of anger inside that self of yours. I'm a similar character to you, how I maintain it is kick boxing to let lose of all that anger that dosen't even need to come form anywhere it just builds up. So when your making everyone else laugh who is making you laugh? this could also be a problem but family guy does this for me. You know when you feel your true self that light headed feeling and feeling bold.

Answer 6

Would you say that all the changes you've gone through (both the ones you've experienced and the changes you've made to yourself), would you say that they were all negative or positive?

Perhaps when you were younger, you felt that way because you didn't have nearly as many worries as you do now. And also, because of that, you want to go back to being that type of person because you miss it. You miss being mostly worry-free. But, with everything that's happened in the last few years, you're not quite sure how to be worry-free again.

Before you can start acting like your old self again, figure out what you like about yourself now. Then, the things you don't like. How can you change those things? Can you somehow use something you like about yourself to get rid of something you don't like? For example, say you're really outgoing, but you hate giving speeches in front of people. What's something you could do that allows you to be outgoing, but is also something that will help you become a better speaker? Maybe that one thing would be learning a monologue, and performing it in front of your loved ones. I give that as an example because, when you're doing a monologue, it's just you up there and you're the one talking; just like when you give a speech, you're the one talking and try to prove a point. When you're doing the acting part of it, you're being outgoing because you're comfortable enough to be in front of people while preforming. So maybe the next time you go to give a speech, just practice it likes it's a monologue, and then you can help change yourself into being a better speaker.

Does that make sense? Do you see what I mean?

Answer 7

you need to consider whether you are clinically depressed. a lot of the symtoms you describe would perhaps indicate that. the egg shell bit and touchiness can be related to depression as can mood swings. if you dont have a doctor you can trust, find one you can talk to and see what they thing. or consider a psychologist.

Answer 8

Time machine, duh

Answer 9

well u can always go to those people that help bringing back memories.. lol forget their names...

Answer 10

Never go back always go forward.  What did you like most about your old-self adopt that today.  How can you change today to make yourself a better person attack that.  What is something that you always want to do but never did do it.  Life is change and the person you were in the past wouldn't be the same in today's world.  You need to except change embrace it and do it.  You will be much more happier.

Answer 11

Well that's totally up to you. Now isn't it. Just...be your old self.

Answer 12

i'm more than certain you aren't really happy. when i was horribly depressed i was the same way. i was extremely shy and anyone was able to annoy or p**s me off. but then when i started getting better and solving my problems i became outgoing again and less irritable. but since you don't even realize you're depressed, maybe you should go to a therapist. i know you said shrinks aren't for you, but you may subconsciously be depressed and a "shrink" will help get those subconscious thoughts out of you and you might go back to your old self. your subconscious is the part of the mind that you aren't aware of. the thoughts in it are stored away, but are shown on the outside. so if you're subconsciously mad at someone you will act mad at them and not even know why. so if you're subconsciously depressed you will show the side effects of being depressed without even realizing you are depressed.

just a thought, not trying to sound like im analyzing you too much.

Answer 13

swish....2 points

Answer 14

You seem to have mapped out my life story here too.

I think maybe the trick isnt to hanker for a past self becasue we get all mixed and melded with change but to look for smaller piece of th e puzzle - like - laughter - Where would you find laughter that you can exchange with others  now in your life. Peace - confidence - take them as separate issues and think where now can I find a place where I can be this.

I dont laugh as much as I used to but my laughter was more of a defence then; now it is more real - I personally laugh when I play table tennis people are so funny playing games.

It really sounds like oyu are putting yourself down a bit rather than accepting who you are now - maybe your defences need tweaking a bit but it i s good to know that you can be a B**** - Just use it judiciously not always look for the same old tools - what also works is to challenge people neutrally - like asking "Did you really mean to talk to me like  that ?"

I meet a lot of people who want to get their old selves back and yet it seems screamingly obvious that they are really lovely and just not very accepting of the new person. Just keep thinking about what you want and how you want to meet it; here and now.

It works for me to really simplify my life so that I have time  to try to be aware of my process in each moment - I smile before each encounter with another person to remind myself that what I am going to meet is another person and how they come is all about them and says nothing about me. They are probably going through hard life lessons and need compassion and my smiles.

    

Answer 15

go to a therapist