How do I break my child of doing whatever she wants?

Question

My four year old thinks she can do whatever she wants all the time. She colors on the wall, gets in mommy's makeup, messes with the electronics etc.... I have tried talking to her, time outs, even making her clean up the messes. Nothing works. It's my feeling that she does this out of boredom. I have tried to find distraction methods to keep her occupied but she goes right back to her bad habits. I thought this was a phase but new naughty thing s are popping up as well ( hitting her sibs, swearing, " I hate you", temper tantrums when she doesn't get her own way). I am at my wits end trying to keep up with all of it. Any suggestions on how to steer her into a different direction would be great.

Answer 1

WELL FIRST OFF...........

KIDS DONT BECOME BAD OVER NITE, THERE MUST OF BEEN ALOT OF DO WHATEVET YOU WANT TIME OTHERWISE YOU WOULD NOT HAVE THIS PROBLEM. i DONT THINK YOU ARE STICKING TO YOUR GUNS. WHAT ARE YOU DOING WHILE SHE IS IN YOUR MAKE UP AND COLORING ON THE WALLS? yOU MUST NOT BE CONSISTANT BECAUSE IF YOU WERE SHE WOULD OF CLEANED UP HER ACT. TRY GETTING THE SUPER NANNY BOOKS

Answer 2

I take it you do not spank your children. To say that kids do not like to be bad is grossly incorrect. A child is more empowered when they are disobdient or defiant. Why? Because it gives them the impression that they are in control. No 4 year old should be cursing. You need to nip this in the bud before you have a monster on your hands. My children are 11, 5, 7 and 1. You need to not accomodate your daughter. When she does something like write on the wall, she needs to clean it up and something needs to be taken from her. Like a toy or a privilege. Stick to you guns! Consistency starts with mom and dad. When she does not get her way then ignore her and keep ignoring her she will get it. I know some may not agree but I spank. Lying and disobedience are not tolerated in my house. Neither is talking back or "expressing yourself" as it is called now. I bet if the next time she does something you swat that butt she will get the picture.

Answer 3

I was watching super nanny last night..which I recommend you watch.  No child likes to be bad it's all in the way you treat and raise them.  You must follow through with time outs everytime she does something wrong not just for a week.  Give her rewards when she does something good...and most imporatantly take her somewhere or let her do something everyday to release all her energy.  Every child is different, try things with her to see what she likes and go with it.

Answer 4

My 2 yr old does the same thing when he's in a mood.  Maybe try spendin some one on one time with her, goind for a walk or doing something she likes.  Or tell her that if she asks this way you wil have to punish her by taking away her favorite toy until she can behave for a while.  These are just suggestions, I am in the same boat as you.

Answer 5

whoop her ***

Answer 6

Obviously, I don't know your specific situation, but many times this is the result of not enough consistency in punishment.  Kids are pretty smart and they know what they can get away with.  My sister-in-law has a similar problem and it is because she is a perpetual threatener and never follows through with punishment.  My nephew will do the same problem behaviors over and over and over, which is followed by my sister-in-law making idle threat after idle threat.  I even sat and watched as he slapped his mother, which was followed by an idle threat of punishment, which was followed by another slap, which wad followed by ANOTHER threat of punishment.  By the time she finally gets to the point where she does punish her son, he has already run wild forever, and then she puts him in time-out, but cuts it short, so there is no real consistency.  You need to lay down the law, give one warning, and administer punishment.  More importantly, you need to stick to it!  Don't be strict one day and a softee another.  Kids throw tantrums.  That's life.  Sometimes parents just have to be "mean" to get their kids to behave, but it is for their own good and for your sanity.  Kids need guidance and consistency.  Good luck!

EDIT:

I am also a proponent of a good swat on the tail if needed...

Answer 7

um, be a parent and not a friend.  obviously your kid is already spoiled and thinks they can have whatever they see.

be consistent.