How do I break up little fights between 10,4 and 9 year olds?

Question

My sons fight and yell all day long and my cheast ios killing me please give me your best advice of how to make them get along better besides send one away or seperating them.I dont have that opton.

Answer 1

Give them things they all like to do that way they can get along.

but LITTLE FIGHTS

come on they are kids that stuff is going to happen!

Answer 2

Your best to ignore the " little" fights if you can...If they dont come to you for help, dont get involved. They need to be able to solve things on their own. Some of the fighting may just be to get your attention

Have rules in the house about hitting and yelling ( ie use inside voices), but other than that, let them sort out the small stuff.

Answer 3

10 let her/him play outside .... but stay in the yard.

4 let him/her play inside in his/her room.

9 play in the living room.

Switch off....

Answer 4

ok, first of all, take out the four year old, bend down to his eye level and tell him that fighting is naughty and take his favourite toy away for the rest of that day and if he is a good boy he will get it back in the morning.  Take the older two and give them two smacks on the bottom, over pants and trousers and tell them they are too old to be fighting and they need to behave.  Take them both by the hand, and make them stand in a corner for 10 minutes in SEPERATE rooms.  Keep the four year old out of these rooms and don't give him a nice activity to do as he will see this as a reward.

Good luck

X

Answer 5

go sit in time out if that don't work talk to them and be really nice if that don't work smack them. as long as you say some thing and you dont do it their going to do it aging but if you say somethink and you do it. it teach them your the boss and their not. ';-)

Answer 6

Why don't yo have the option of separating them? There are 4 corners in every room. My daughter's therapist told me that time out with her nose in the corner one minute for every year she is old is wonderful. The older kids are going to hate it because that is "for babies" (words from my daughter) They can be in the same room but different corners.  It straightened mine up pretty quick.

You could also try and change there attention to something else like a game or a movie. A reward system for not fighting or yelling for an hour or 2 like a cookie or some fruit or even craft time might help also. Maybe tell them you will take away their outside time if it continues. Make sure they get plenty of exercise.There are many options out there. Just find one that works for you.

Good luck 3 boys!! You have your work cut out for you. Have faith.

Answer 7

I've gotta put up with it ALL the time. The kids in my family are very naughty. I first give them a verbal warning saying "If you guys don't knock it off and behave, I'm going to put you in seperate rooms". If they do it again, I will first yell at them.. If they are disrespectful and don't listen, I grab them by the arm (Not hard, but will some kind of force), And put each of them in seperate rooms. They have to stay in there decribing their age.. example: 9 year old 9 minutes, 2 year old 2 minutes etc. I make them stay in there for that long and when I tell them there time is up, they need to apologize and explain to me what the problem is that they are fighting over.. Then usually they don't act up again for awhile.

Answer 8

Find a way or something what they both like

so they can enjoy it both .

Sending one of them away doesnt help

they wont get allong with each other.

maybe they watch desame tv serie like pokemon?

put pokemon on the tv  =)

Answer 9

Little fights I try to let my kids work out on their own. But there are days it drives me insane. I have threatened to make them go run laps around the backyard, but have not done that yet as it is really hot where we live. But I have made them stop and give each other 1 compliment, that usually makes them stop somewhat because if they are mad at each other they do not want to be handing out the compliments LOL

And sometimes they are just stir crazy with school being out. Get out of the house for a while usually helps all of us feel better.

Answer 10

Get a TASER. Just one ZAP with that and they will be angels.

NO REALLY, try giving each one an individual task to perform in different areas of the house or yard. Once they have completed the task, ask the older boys (9 & 10) to help the younger one. You may have to try this a few times with different subjects. Try to find things that the oldest is good at and tell him to teach the younger two. Find one big fun project (like building a clubhouse) that will take more than one day. let each boy have a chance at suggesting ideas for the project. While you supervise, let each boy work on his own suggested idea. Every once and awhile ask one boy to help another on their idea (ask one to hold a board while another paints it -something like that). If all else fails, find something soft (pillows or foam balls) for them to fight with to minumize injury. (I still prefer the TASER)

Answer 11

hard love..   start threatening them jobs!

cut away allowances.. fun time..       tell them you ain't got the time for drama!

also check their diet.. does it have too much fat and junk food in it?

(diets are important also.. i know it sounds so liberal but it's true too)  also...

tell them you'll seperate them in a bad way  (whatever ways you can)  if they soon don't grow up.

with mine..   my first wife takes two of the kids..   when mine get bad.. they hate that!   so now they behave..    my first wife has no time and she lets the nanny have them and boy that nanny is super duper british and strict!

heheheh!

also i seperate them and make the elder children do chores and little jobs...   with very little pay...

sure shuts them up.

the younger ones..   i make do "gitmo"  time.   i stand them into the corner and i sit back and preach the gospel of good habits.. OH they HATE that...

and i say...  "now.. if you can all get along and do some light work.. i don't have to drive you up the walls and be a president bush!"

it helps..

also...  i have neighbors that need extra help around the house and yard.. and if my kids act up!  OH YEH they help out the hood... with little OR no pay.

and i cut back their allowance..  ( i put it into the  "they are not behaving again college fund"  which they are unaware of)

there are many  innovative ways to work children into a new way of thinking.. it's tough but... they aren't getting any younger and you know how that gets..  with your stress and chest pains.

you can also fake a fainting spell...   that'll shock them into shape.. if you soon don't get those kids straightened up with one another.. you will have a spell and it may cost you in the long run in more ways than one.

think of ways and ask for suggestions from others.. sensible reasoning with some hard love and logic can go a long long way.

no one said it is easy and yes you do have to be the bad guy unfortunately...

but with some training, control and strict obedience you will win in the end and one day those bratlings will thank you.

no kidding!

also if they have a talent.. hobby....   take them away to do that.       set them away from the others,   make each one do a special thing..    if they artsy,  make them do that..   the other do the laundry or fix up something that needed attention that you need help on.   take them away from what they're doing.. sooner or later they'll get the point.. who knows...  some may even want it.   just to get away..   kids stress out also.. i'm sure they rather be doing something functional and creative instead of being drama masters.

i made my eldest child who was an artist of sorts.. get into clay.. clay is a very good stress tool.. omg it's hard to watch sometimes but now they work in clay and have shows in town with their work.  oh my god the anger they set out while they worked in clay.. it's a sure mess but..  it was creative, they got it out of their system instead of fighting and now they are a known artist who works in clay  (locally known, not super famous now!  no i doubt they'll be famous but they are getting to the point that now they are helping other kids.. who have the same problems and getting them into clay and other things arty.  :D  )

Answer 12

give the 4 year old a sucker and tell him to go sit down somewhere and think about it and tell the other 2 i cant belive u setting this exmaple 4 your younger brother and tell them to go to there room and dont come out untill i tell u 2 and think about wat u did and if they have tvs and u here 1 on go tell them there ground for 3 days

Answer 13

i would say....give them activities of their own that connects to realizing that they are brothers and not suppose to fight but love.

Answer 14

Mace 'em.

Answer 15

Ask them if they wouldn't mind fighting and yelling outside, then squirt 'em with the garden hose.  lol hehe.  

Seriously, try playing some Mozart's classical music in the house.  It worked for my niece and nephew when they would fight a lot.  I used to babysit them when my sis would go on vacation with her husband.  

You could also try rewarding them something if they behave, but not overdo it of course because you dont' want them to expect that every single time.  

I hope all works out for you.  :)

Ciao,

- Stallion