How do I constructively criticize my son's babysitter? (serious answers only)?

Question

A good friend of mine is my 7-month-old son's babysitter this summer. I've been letting her use my laptop during the day. My original intention, and I thought that this would go without saying, was for her to use it when he was sleeping or in his exersaucer, etc. But slowly, I've been noticing that her internet usage has become her main activity and watching my son has kind of become a side activity. I'll come home to find him sitting on the couch beside her as she types on the computer, or her doing this while trying to feed him at the same time. This is not acceptable to me! I'm paying her to watch my son and give him some individualized attention. Since she's my friend, I don't want to come across too harsh, but something definitely needs to be said. What would you say?

Answer 1

I would talk nicely to her about it. Let her know she's a friend and your very happy she's baby-sitting your son, BUT that you feel she's making the laptop too much of a priority instead of baby-sitting your son. Tell her that she should only go on during nap time.

If you are to come home to her on the laptop when he's not napping, I would take the laptop with you or hide it in a place she can't find. Let her know nicely that you need to make sure she focuses on your son and NOT the computer so she has lost the privilage.

If she does other things, I'd reconsider her baby-sitting. Let her know you still want to be friends, but you feel like the two of them aren't a good match!

Good luck!

Answer 2

Just be nice and blunt and tell her the internet and laptop are for when the baby is sleeping. That you pay her to babysit.

Answer 3

If it was me i would take the lap top away and say its broken,if your out how will you know shes not on it all the time,take temptation out of her way so she can concentrate on your son

Answer 4

It's a laptop.....take the battery out and lose the adapter.  Or take the laptop to work with you as you 'might need it for work'.  Then 'forget' it at work!~~~

Good Luck

Answer 5

tell her you "accedently" droppped it and its getting repair...and just hide it and if she asks why you havent gotten it back said you havent had time and you dont really need it rite now anyways!

Answer 6

There is no way .. What works for you in your life might not work for her in her life. So to try to teach her won't work! What you need to do is just be frank with her. It is your kid and this is how you want it done with your kid. She can use her method on her time.

Answer 7

I know its probably not the most honest way, but if it were me, I'd just say the laptop was broken or having issues, and just hide it away somewhere while she's babysitting your son.  I just don't think there is any nice way to tell her to stop using the computer and pay attention to your son more.  Things will either get awkward between you if you do, or she'll get offended, and neither is a good situation to get into.

Good luck!

Answer 8

If she is a really good friend then you shouldn't have to lie and "forget"  the lap top at work or tell her it's broken. Try sitting her down and say hey I notice your on the computer a lot. Do you think you can restrict it to his nap time only. It would mean a lot to me. Let her know that you trust her with your son and him getting the proper attention is really important to you. If she really is that good of a friend she will understand if not then just tell her your taking the lap top with you or find a new sitter.

Answer 9

I would hide the laptop. Tell her it's being worked on right now or something. Make some kind of excuse.

Answer 10

How about just telling her that the laptop isn't working and lock it up somewhere.

Her primary job is your son, not anything else. I would just hide the laptop and just tell her its not working.

Answer 11

I would just tell her the truth.  

Tell her what's bothering you.  Maybe she's not realizing how much time she is spending on the Internet.

And let's face it - your son is NUMBER ONE.  Period.

Sure, you could hide behind a lie like "oh - the computer's broken" - but it doesn't solve anything.  And all that's going to do is take you on a wild goose-chase with lying about the computer being broken (how long is a computer broken for anyway, come on already).

Just tell her the truth - she's spending WAY too much time on the computer/Internet and you want it to stop.  She's suppose to be there babysitting your son - not the Internet.

That's what I would do.