How do I convince my husband not to drive our kids cross country for Christmas?

Question

My husband wants to drive our two sons (ages 4 and 3) from Atlanta to Detroit for Christmas. He wants to take one of our cars (as opposed to renting one) and it's very unreliable...140,000 miles, semi-bad tires, idle problems, etc. I REALLY don't want him to take them, and especially not on a 15 hour non-stop (except for gas and food) road trip in an unreliable car (actually, I think the trip itself, regardless of the car) is too long to drive alone, and especially with two young kids. Any advice/suggestions? I'm making myself sick worrying about this. :(

Answer 1

Can't you go with him? I think that christmas is a few months off and I would say that if you want to drive that far the car needs to have it's issues worked out first. Before you take a car anywhere on vacation it needs to have all bugs worked out. I come from a long line of truckers and our vehicles always got a working on before a vacation. My husband is a truck driver and he knows that if we are going to go anywhere for the weekend he needs to top off all fluid levels, check tires, and inspect how the truck is running. If the truck isn't up to par then it gets the overhaul before we hit the road. Talk to your husband about it. Now, as for driving across country. I think with two little ones it's going to be impossible for him to drive that distance without a break. I mean if he really wants to drive that long and listen to a 4 and 3 year old scream and cry in the backseat because they are miserable then that's a whole other issue. I grew up in the backseat of a car practically. We were always going on vacation and I did fine riding for a long distance but my parents always knew to stop to let the youngins take a rest. When we used to take a trip from Las Vegas, NV to Coos Bay, OR it would take us two days. Two days of driving with one night at a motel for sleep. But in all fairness my husband has drove 14 straight hours without a l**k of sleep before. I think it would be foolish of him to think he can drive that long with two little ones, they don't have the patience to sit in a car that long. I think the only thing you can do is talk to him openly and honestly about this. Taking a trip cross country is great. I love road trips but it's unrealistic with the way he's got it planned. The kids are going to be crankey without a break and he's going to be crankey because they are. So, talk to him he's your husband and they are your kids. The issues with the car need to be worked out and a rest half way through needs to be planned out for the kids to stretch and get out of the backseat of the car. My 3 and 5 year old would never permit us to be in the truck that long. They would throw a fit.

Answer 2

What you really need to do is to talk this over, try to understand what's important to each other, try to understand each other's needs, desires & concerns, then come to an agreement that leaves both of you feeling respected and valued in the relationship.  

Why is it that he wants to go to Detroit?  Is it to see family?  If my husband wanted to do something like that, I would try to help him to be fulfilled & happy in that way.  

There are risks involved in everything that you undertake in life.  If he can show you how he's prepared to deal with roadside emergencies & agrees to break the trip up a bit to make it easier on the kids, do you think that you'd be able to change your attitude & start to see this as a loving adventure for your family to take together?  

Answer 3

I'm confused why you aren't spending Christmas with you two sons and your husband.  Then there would be two drivers, you would be with your family so you wouldn't worry so much.  

Answer 4

well just tell him what u really feel! like the things u said in ur question