How do I convince my mom to let me go to school?

Question

I'm 11 and I've been homeschooling my entire life, so has my siblings. Anyways, I really HATE homeschooling and I don't have many friends, just acquaintances and ONE best friend. It really sucks because I do go to dance lessons but the only people I hang out with there never hang out with me anywhere else but there. My mom tried to involve me in a homeschool group in our area, but everyone there was really nerdy and dressed like they were in the 70s. I always ask to go to school but my mom always says no. I really wanna convince her to let me go to school because all of my dance friends go there and they love it and have many friends. I want that too. What are some things I can tell her to let me go? It seems like I have tried EVERYthing.

Answer 1

by getting god marks in ur class

Answer 2

I only saw one mistake in your typing........you're getting a good education (text book style).  To get a leg up in the social world.....hmmmmm, you're only 11. And i bet you have siblings.  Your parents are prolly afraid of the outside world...they want to keep you safe.  So I'm suprised you're on yahoo.......

Be strong.  keep dancing.  enjoy every moment.  when you're 18, you're legally free.  Plan ahead.  I know you're tryin.

peace & good luck

Answer 3

just begg your mom for a long time its bound to get anoying

so she will say yes

Answer 4

Perhaps an option could be a private school.  I went to a Catholic school for nine years and turned out ok.  But it does not have to be a Catholic school, I am just talking in general terms.  Your mom may be afraid of the influences found in public schools.  Don't give up on wanting to go to an outside school, just discuss what other options there are for you elsewhere.  Good luck.

Thanks for the "best answer" you gave me previously!!

Answer 5

Several things to consider. Why do you hate homeschooling? Can you make a detailed list of the reasons why you believe public school would be better for you? Write down your list and ask your mom to hold a meeting with you where you both politely discuss your future and what would be best for you. Be prepared to compromise and discuss logically all the points on your list and her list. Think of her possible objections ahead of time so you can prepare your responses. Try to not be emotional but logical during the discussion and act as politely as you can. Your mom will have many reasons for choosing to homeschool you and the change to public school for you will affect her life and the rest of your family as well. It is not a simple or quick decision. Think about more than just the immediate future of your social life. Consider what you want from life and how you believe public school will help you attain your goals.

Parents want what is best for their kids. That being said, whining is really annoying. The adage "Act like an adult" may sound trite, but is the best way to argue your case.

If you really just want to hang out with your dance friends more, invite them over to your home for hanging out, for a sleep over, for a party, etc. Being in school with them won't automatically give you more time hanging out with them. If they aren't inviting you to hang out with them now, why would that change just because of where you attend school? Be the best friend you can now to them and invite them over. If they won't hang out with you now, they aren't worthwhile friends.

Good luck.

Answer 6

I think what might help is finding out why your mom feels that homeschooling is the only option. That is the best way to figure out what arguement has the best chance. Remember that your mom/parents had to have thought this through before commiting to homeschooling so they must have good reasons, but that's not saying you don't have good reasons either. Just don't discredit their reasons to prove your own.

And not all homeschooling "isolates" you from the "real world". Depending on the parent and the child homeschooling can even be more beneficial than public schooling.

Answer 7

I'm not sure that going to public school sounds like such a good idea. You sound very influenced already just by the public schooled kids in your dance class--you want to be like them. What will happen once in school? You'll be a follower, doing like everybody else is doing so that you feel you fit in, even if it's not really who you are. That you are unwilling to become friends with people because they are "really nerdy and dressed like they were in the 70s" isn't very nice--how would you feel if all the girls you know rejected you because they felt you were "really nerdy" and didn't like your clothes? That sort of attitude is rampant in schools. You really want to grow up to be judgemental?

As for the "don't have many friends"... Again, this sounds like something that you have learned from your public school friends/acquaintances. Do your parents have lots of friends? Do they hang out with them on a daily basis? Most adults don't spend their lives hanging around lots of friends. It's just not normal. It's something that schools ended up creating due to how they're structured. It doesn't mean there's something wrong with not having lots of friends; just that many kids in school are so used to it that they THINK there's something wrong with it and judge others for not having some arbirtrary quota. Do you feel like these friends/acquaintances of yours are judging you because you don't have as many friends? Or is it that you have bought into the idea that there's something wrong with you not having more friends?

Besides, you can still end up in school having only one best friend (actually, you can't usually have more than just one best friend) and acquaintances on the side.

You are fine the way you are. Truly. Self-acceptance is such an important lesson to learn. It is one that is VERY hard to learn in the judgemental, competitive atmosphere of public school. You will be so busy making sure everybody else accepts you that you won't have the time to make sure you are accepting--and being--yourself.

Answer 8

Wow. I'm like, in the exact same situation as you. I mean EXACTLY! Well, except for the fact that, even though I don't have many friends, I LOVE HOME SCHOOLING!!! Sry, but I can't really help you in this situation. Except, if your mom says no, e-mail me. Who knows, we might be friends(over the internet that is).

Answer 9

"the grass is always greener on the other side"

Public school sounds so cool until you get there!!! There is the waiting in line, bullies, pressure to fit in, and all the rules of school. Your mom just wants what's best for you.

It sounds like you are making it difficult on yourself. It sounds as if your mom tried to get you involved with others your age but you didn't even give it a try. What is wrong with dressing like you are in the 70s, maybe they think you dress too trendy.  Maybe you should give it a try.

Answer 10

I have to agree that you sound pretty caught up in appearances. What is wrong with "nerdy"? The world is full of many kinds of people, try to learn to appreciate them all. One thing you have not thought of is in that group, you can be THE fashionista, whereas with the other girls, you won't stand out nearly as much. There is nothing wrong with being into fashion or with being hip. But you cannot go through life choosing your friends by who dresses like you. Give those kids another chance. I am appalled by the way one of my dearest friends dresses. It is truly ghastly, but I love her and I'd trust her with my life. I'd hate to have missed out on her because she looked a little frumpy. We have alot of fun together.

  As to the dance crowd: Do you call them up? Invite one of them to the movies and dinner with you and your folks. Invite them shopping, out for a soda, or to visit an art gallery. Go to the library with them and flip through all the fashion mags if that's what you like. Invite them jogging in the park. Throw a small party, watch musicals and dance numbers. Use egg shaped cookie cutters to make sugar cookies, then ice them to look like ballet slippers. Shop online for new dance clothes and videos with those girls. Get to know them. Do something! Don't give up too quickly. You can have the best of both worlds. My point is, you cannot sit home and wait for your dream social life to come to you. You have to make it happen. Sitting around blaming your parents won't help, neither will changing schools. You have to work at it, that is why they're called social "skills". They take practice.

  Your question is remarkably well written for an 11 year old. Kudos.

Answer 11

Glurpy had a great point that I hope you take seriously. You sound like you would end up being a "follower" in public school, and that is dangerous.

Let me share that my oldest daughter is now taking 3 classes at the public high school here. She thought going in that she would have lots of "friends" now. She came home the other day saying that although she is friendly with several kids, she really didn't consider them her "friends." She still has the same circle that she had before she went in to that arena. One "best friend" and a good handful of trusted friends. She is well liked and admired at her school as a leader, but she doesn't want to get tangled up in the garbage she says the other kids do in worrying about "who's dating who" and "what clothes are popular."  She is herself, take her or leave her. I encourage you to look at yourself and do the same thing. It seems very judgmental to say kids are nerdy because of how they appear. That is very sad.

Also, to get friends, you should BE a friend. Are you just trying to impress people and have them flock to you? Why not invite some friends over, set up a "movie night" or something like that?  Be real with them though, if they don't except you for who you are, they really aren't friends are they?