How do I deal with a Narcissistic couple?

Question

Ok my wife and I have these friends well call the P and K. Before they were together we could tell that they well self centered but it was just P and K we didn't make anything of it, it was actually pretty funny to be around them. When they got together it was all over, the competition begun. These two have been mirroring our lives and become intolerably competitive. It is so bad that we even delayed telling everyone we were having a baby because we were afraid that she might try to get pregnant. I know it sounds weird trust me i dont know why we felt that way but we did. They have rented an apartment in our building and now we dont talk to them anymore. Since, i have read a little about there behavior and it has led me to believe that we are dealing with narcissistic people. At times i feel bad that we dont talk to them anymore but its just too difficult to be friends with them they are overbearing at times and like the song, our conversations are as follows "anything you can do i can do better, i can do anything better than you" or something like that :) Its soooo annoying. Do we ignore them, do we not invite them to our baby shower, what do we do?????

Answer 1

Learn how to make an energy ball from your hand and throw it at them!

Son Goten style!!

Answer 2

If you really enjoy their company, tell them how you feel. They may not be aware of their actions, and you would be doing them a favor. I sincerely doubt they are narcissists; they sound like they have poor self esteem and are insecure..I know this sounds silly, but, perhaps they think they need to keep up with you or you will reject them ( which, ironically, you have already done ).Get a bottle of wine, invite them over, and talk.

Don't be surprised if you are invited to their house a week later. Of course, the wine will be more expensive. lol

Answer 3

Tell them how you feel, and if it is all just a coincidence then you'll have your answer, if its not then tell them to please stop because it really bothers you. I wouldn't ignore them, it'll seem like you hate them now (which may be so) but at least let them know what your feeling.

Answer 4

Narcissistic people want to be followed. They want to be the ones in the lead. What you describe could be Dependent Personality Disorder instead. If that is the case, they're glued to you. Move away.

Answer 5

they do not define the word narcissism

they are practically doing the complete opposite. you need to talk to them and tell them to find their own lives and not copy yours. they sound like very sad individuals/ couple andyou and your wife must be very admirable in some way for them to want to be like you. take it as a compliment but it sounds as if they are going to far.  

Answer 6

1.  narcissistic is a label you are putting on others.  you could just as easily think "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery"  - labels don't help anything and tend to dehumanize others.  they may have a psychological weakness that irritates you.  

2.  if you don't enjoy being friends with them, that's ok.  you have to be responsible for living your life and not doing things you don't enjoy.  if you don't want them at your party, don't invite them.  you have no responsibility to them or to make them feel ok or good.  you have a responsibiltiy to yourself to pursue happiness.  take responsibility for the fact that you are choosing not to associate with them instead of blaming them by labeling them.  take responsibility for your actions and your life.  it's ok.

Answer 7

I personally would stay away because you never know what they could be plotting next. Also they could be very obsessive people and they could end up being stalkerish and you dont want to get into that... especially with a baby on the way...personally id not talk to them.. avoid them as much as possible and stay away...if it doesnt work and it because soo much of a hassle.. restraining order.....  

Answer 8

Some people say that copying is the biggest form of flattery.  But I can understand why this would annoy you because it would totally annoy me too.  You shouldn't, however, let this couple ruin your lives for you and dictating how you decide what you will do.

What I would do is give them the benefit of the doubt and see if they are really doing what you think they are doing.  Maybe they think you are closer friends than you want or make them out to be.  Pretending to be best friends with them is not helping matters any.  Unless you are honest with them and tell them how you feel about what they do, how can they know not to do it.

Test them and see if they do this on purpose.  Go and tell them you are pregnant and if she does become pregnant too during this time then you have to tell them.  You can't hide the fact that you are having a baby anyways for very long so just go ahead and tell them.  

What I think is really weird is that they rented an apartment in the same building where you are living now.  If it really gets annoying, I would just move again without telling them you are planning to.  You don't have to give advance warning to this couple you are moving.  

I think you need to keep your distance from this couple for  a while especially since this is constantly playing in your head.  This will lead to stress in your own relationship and that's not good.  If they continue to follow you around just tell them the truth that you no longer want to be friends with them.  

Or if you want an easy way out you can just let the friendship fade away.  And also why do you tell them everything you are going to do in advance?  You don't have to tell them what you are doing.

Answer 9

Nope, not narcissism. They'd not be copying you, for they'd imagine you were envious of them. Sounds like something weirder. If they creep you out, cut the ties. Sounds like a lot of needless and uncomfortable one-upsmanship.  

Answer 10

Time to just ignore them ... put them out of your lives , unless you enjoy the aggravation.  I wouldn't invite them to anything ... get it in your head , they do not exist anymore .

Answer 11

I think you just want them to buy you a gift, and that is just so wrong!  Only invite your close friends and relatives to your shower...these people clearly do not fall into either category.