Maybe I am overreacting; I am rather stressed out.
Basically, my mom has awful taste in men, and she tends to pick control freaks. Both my dad, and the guy she is married to. It's her life, I don't want to interfere with it if she's happy that way. The problem is that I have to live in the same house as this guy, and I can't really leave, seeing as I have no money, no job, no... anything.
Okay, let's see if I can explain this.
I am eighteen, and yet, I am not "allowed" to leave the house when my mom and my step-dad are out of town. That's the biggest one.
Even if they are not out of town, I have to tell them way ahead of time before I do anything at all, unless I want to be talked at, and talked at, and talked at, and basically made to feel like I am some sort of terrible monster who raped and killed fifty thousand people and their children.
I have to clean my room. I completely understand this, it isn't my house, and my room was a huge mess. The problem is that if I do not have it done by a certain time, my step-dad will "do it for me", which means, basically, that he throws away all of my stuff. Or anyway, that is how he makes it sound, and knowing him, I am probably correct.
I am very, very certain that he spies on me. I went into the office while he was in there to close the window, and what do I see on his monitor? A website that looks EXACTLY like my inbox (not that I make it a habit to stare at other people's monitors, but the way the office is set up, it is difficult to completely avoid an accidental glance). To make this even more suspicious, when he noticed that I was in the room, he covers the monitor with a piece of paper. I have since changed my password, so hopefully he can't do that anymore, but it still bothers me.
You see, if he would actually listen to me, and maybe explain his actions with more than "because he said so", I could deal with this. But, talking TO him is impossible, since if I say anything negative at all, he thinks I am attacking him (and no, I do not talk to him like I typed this, that would be stupid), and he stops listening and goes into some sort of circular logic, and he is always correct, whether the facts point elsewhere or not.
I really don't know how to deal with him. Talking with my therapist helps me feel a little better, but it doesn't change anything. And believe me, I have tried to understand him. I treat him just like I treat everyone else (I get a lot of compliments on how nice, polite, and well-behaved I am from teachers and other authority figures quite often, but maybe they are lying?), but there is always something wrong with me, or what I am doing, my style of speech, the mood I am in, or even how I react to whatever he wants to say to me. According to my mom, I haven't been very nice to him, but I seriously have no idea what I did to him, and neither of them will explain it.
Maybe I am just spoiled and self-important, but none of this seems right, and when I tell people like my therapist, they agree with me. I really don't know what to do about this, and I feel incredibly stuck.
So... Gosh. What do I do? I'm sorry this is so long. :/
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