How do I find out if my ex wife gave our new born up for adoption?

Question

My wife and I were only together a few months and got pregnant. She left me a while back and should of had the baby a few weeks ago. I think she has given it up for adoption and will not contact me. I want to have the baby but I can not figure out how to find any information. Does anybody know what I can do and quick? PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

You weren't checking on a daily basis if she was in the hospital or not? You should have thought about wanting the baby a few weeks ago.

Answer 2

Find out if your state has a putative father's registry. (call your local health department)  REGISTER.  Take out a legal notice in the paper, stating that if this woman (your ex-wife's name) has placed an infant for adoption it is without your consent, and that you believe yourself to be the father.

HIRE A LAWYER.  Have him contact her. (your divorce lawyer should be able to do this.)  Custody of the unborn child should have been spelled out in your divorce!

Request a copy of your child's birth certificate from the state or county.

Good luck.

Answer 3

There is a law called the punitive father registry, which you will need to go to the county clerk's office immediately (if it's not too late), and in writing, give as much information about her, the address, the due date, etc.  You will need legal names, and all the information possible.  Open a bank account, and put money in, even if it's just a few dollars, to prove that you are trying to support this child.  Get a lawyer, legal aid might help, go to the hospital, with a copy of your divorce decree, and state that you believe the child is yours, and you want information of when she had the baby.  Write her a registered letter stating you want visitation with the baby, and custody.  With this, you can at least prove that you've tried to contact her. Good luck.  Also, if you know her health insurance agent, you should be able to get information there.  Good luck.

Answer 4

Can't you approach her and ask her?  If she claims the baby is not yours, get a court-ordered DNA test to prove it.  Maybe call a lawyer to help.

Answer 5

Find out if your state has a putative father registry.  If it does, sign it NOW!!  Below are states that I know have them:

Alabama

Arizona

Georgia

Idaho

Illinois

Indiana

Iowa

Kansas

Kentucky

Louisiana

Massachusetts

Minnesota

Missouri

New Mexico

New York

Ohio

Oklahoma

Oregon

South Dakota

Tennessee

Texas

Utah

Vermont

Wisconsin

Wyoming

If your ex relinquishes your child for adoption and you haven't signed the registry, you can and likely will, lose your parental rights, even though the child is yours.  There are plenty of men fighting in courts at this time, trying to get custody of their own children, because they didn't know about these obscure, poorly publicized registries.  

After signing the registry if your state has one, make sure you sign the registry for surrounding states.  A couple of men are fighting battles because the mothers of their children gave birth and relinquished in neighboring states.  The fathers had no idea this was going to happen, therefore never would have known to register in the neighboring states.

The very next thing you need to do is contact an attorney.  Men are finding it harder and harder to gain custody of their children when the mother wishes to relinquish for adoption.  These court battles are long and ugly.  Don't wait another day!  Take care of these matters now!!

Answer 6

Well maybe if you would've paid attention to her, you'd know... Either way, contact her friends and family and find out... it'll be your best bet.

GOOD LUCK PAL!

Answer 7

You need to talk to a lawyer. In many states, if you were not supporting her throughout the pregnancy, you have no rights over the child.

Answer 8

Call the local hospitals and adoption agencies and get a in contact with the local news paper ..Seriously do it now..and explain your situation.

Answer 9

If your name is not on the birth certificate, I don't think you have any options. Maybe you should hire a lawyer, they can help you better than anyone on YA can. Good luck!

Answer 10

go to the hospital where she had the baby. you can get a lawyer and she by law has to reveal what she did. if it is truly your baby you have the right to have it. you may need a dna test though. you can go and get the birth cert. or check your local foster care/adoption agencies

Answer 11

Call a family law attorney.

There are a lot of posts about the putative father registry and if you live in one of those states you should probably call them but I do NOT think they would apply to you since you were married when the child was conceived. In that case, you are already the legal father and do NOT need to sign the registry. When the mother is married the husband is almost always the legal father until he gives up his rights to that child, even if the kid isn't his biologically. Look the registry in your state up if they have one and call to make sure but I expect you don't actually need to sign it.

Also, since you were married when the baby was conceived she probably can NOT legally place the child for adoption without your consent at least from what I know. She may have placed it but probably you could get it back? You definitely need to call a lawyer ASAP though to figure out where the child is, sometimes there are time limits and requirements in this type of situation that you need to deal with right away. You may be able to call the hospitals and figure out if the baby was born yet, but sometimes they don't release the info. A lawyer should be able to help you find her and the baby. Good luck.

Answer 12

You do have an option. If you want the child. Contact DHS. Tell them the mother and how old the baby should be. If she did in fact give it up for adoption you'll need to tell them your the father and do not give permission. They'll make you take a paternity test. Get a Lawyer if possible. It could be very difficult. Babies are adopted quickly as most couples who cant conceive would rather have a baby than a 10 year old.  Good Luck Sir. Best wishes your way. I was adopted and I wonder every day why my parents didn't want me but if you do something your child may never need to wonder.

Answer 13

contact one of her friends or drive over there

Answer 14

There are people on this forum with more knowledge, but I believe that you need to find out if your state has a purative father registry.  This is essentially a registry where a man would indicate that he has, or might possibly have, a child out there.  Some states make it too easy for women to place a child for adoption while skirting the rights of the baby's father.  

If your state has one of these registries, you need to get on it immediately.  Contacting a lawyer would be in your best interests as well.  If you wait too long, you will be denied your rights to raise your child.