How do I get help for my son?

Question

My son is 12 years old, in 7th grade. He was diagnosed as ADHD in 1st grade. He has been on and IEP and a 504. He has not received special services since 5th grade. He is no longer medicated and I asked the school for help with keeping him on track. All I have asked for is that they help remind him to write his assignments in his notebook so that I can help him at home not to forget anything. They said they would "try" but that it is his resonsibility! I am so upset that the teachers are denying him any extra help beyond what they want to do. He has no friends and no support system at school. What can I do and what channels do I need to go through to get the services he deserves and needs? I feel like I am alone trying to fight a losing battle. Please help!

Answer 1

Home school him, hes' your son, stop expecting other people to do it.

Answer 2

I know leaving isn't always the answer, but if the teachers at your son's school are really refusing to help him in the way that you want, nothing good can come of that.  Your son might need a little extra support and reinforcement, and he may need teachers who really care about him and want to do what's in his best interest.  Maybe search around for a different school that IS capable of handling your son in this manner.  As for his making friends and gaining a support system, have you tried any ADHD support groups for moms and their children?

Answer 3

If your son has a current IEP, he should have access to additional support from the school district. I would reccommend that you call (and write) the special education coordinator and request behavioral support for him. A BCBA (Board Certified Behavior Analyst) would be able to develop a self-monitorning program to help your son maintain and use his own schedule. All teachers or support staff should be on board with the program, and support him as he uses it. The behavior plan should include a reinforcement contingency- he would essentially earn something he desires for keeping on track with his schedule. The schedule should initially be easier, and as he has success, it should develop into something more complex. (Smaller "component" skills first, then larger "composite" skills develop.) The goal would be for him to find using his schedule reinforcing.

Answer 4

Be peristent w/ teachers; The school counselor & go to school board if that doesnt work.  Their getting paid to teach our children sometimes we have to remind them of that.  Sorry to hear your setbacks.

Answer 5

Talk to the principal, explain that your child needs this help and if all fails consider changing schools

Answer 6

To start with a child can not have both an IEP and a 504 plan.  If ADHD is the only problem your child has then it is very unlike that your child will have an IEP.  ADHD is not a recognized catagory of special education and unless there is more problems such as extreme behavior probelms usually violence then a 504 plan will be written.  Make sure your childs 504 plan has been properly completed and given to your sons teachers.  If this plan states that his teachers must help him write his assissment and stay organized then they have no choice but to comply.  If therer is no current 504 or IEP file a request for a child study with your school.  If you request this then the school can not leagally deny your son.   Once something is decided the school will have to have a meeting with you and you can insist that the teachers check to make sure your son has accuratly copied his assignment s or you make them have one of his accomidations to be for the teacher to send you a copy of her lesson plans wich would include everything she did during class and what she assigned for homework.  If the School is not complying with you I have two words left for you DUE PROCESS.  I guarentee that your school board will listen to your concerns if you use those two words.  No school wants to hear these words from a parent that is seeking help on for their child.  I wish you the best of luch

Answer 7

The IEP should states specific needs for your son.  They are legally binded to do whatever the IEP says.  That is the law.  Even if it isn't in his IEP, your request is not at all unreasonable.  If you don't get results from the teacher, go to the principal.  If you don't get results from the principal, go to the superintendent.  If you don't get results there, go to the school board.  Also, make sure his next IEP lists everything you need for your son.

Good luck and God Bless.  More parents need to get involved in their kids' lives and stand up for them when necessary.

Answer 8

i to am going threw the same situation. my son is 6 and we just had him tested out of the schools reach. an independant spectrum group tested him our insurance paid most of the cost, but we did get a medical diagnosis which is worth its weight in gold. the school took away some of his support from last year and that was not acceptable for my husband and i. after many request for more special ed for our child, we were ultimately told he is progressing and there was no need for more special ed. however after the diagnosis and the recomendations from a licensed specialist and a request for an iep meeting he is now recieving the help he needs. it is a fight i am not going to lie to you, but his disabilities where there in black and white from the evaluation we had done out of the schools graps.the school didn't have a leg to stand on. we did this without the school knowing and requested the iep meeting.when we arrived we spelled in out to the loud and clear, help our child or we will seek legal help. the next day his minutes with the special ed teachers where doubled. we didn't exchange nasty words with them. we just made our intentions loud and clear with the documents to prove it.i do not know your situation but if you can find a way to have your son re-evaluated, do it.the suggest a re-evaluation at least every 2 years.the school evaluation will be the minimul they can get away with and thats all your child will receive. i wish you and your child all the best of luck, remember who you are fighting for and keep fighting.  god bless. kathy and family.

Answer 9

It sounds to me like your child has trouble with organization. This can be put as an extra goal on his IEP if it directly effects his learning, which it seems like it does.  In this case, you have to contact his case manager first, talk about the situation and request that it be a goal on his IEP. If that gets you nowhere, talk to the director of special education or the principal.

Answer 10

there are many self-help books geared to both the child and the parent.your best resource is the library.At the end of the book there are many sources and societies that can be extrememly helpful.You can also look on-line  at the ADHD website to seek helpful soutions,

Answer 11

Don't be too hard on the teachers.  They're doing the best they can with very little appreciation for it.  They're underpaid, overworked, and get no support.

Try contacting the principal or school counselor and see what they recommend.

Answer 12

Call a PPT - request that one of his accomodations (pg 8) be that he keep a notebook with his assignments in it.  Your son can write it - but the teacher has to sign it (your son will have to bring it to them) to confirm the work.  You should also be able to request a child advocate (free?) to sit in the meeting to represent your son's best interest.

Answer 13

Is he still on an IEP or 504?  Without those, teachers are not legally required to agree to any of the accomodations you may request and even with those, the accomodations must be listed on the plan for the teachers to be legally bound to follow it.  It sounds as if he has been off any sort of educational plan for the past few years.  Since he is beginning a stage of education that will take strong orginizational skills, an area many kids with ADHD struggle with, it may be time to have the school re-evaluate him and see about re-instating at least a 504 as a way to be sure he gets this basic assitance.  You may also want to look into finding a workshop specifically designed to help kids with ADD/ADHD/learning disabilities learn how to organize themselves.  I know the therapy office my daughter goes to offers them frequently.  A group therapy situation that focuses on social skills and coping for kids with similar issues to his may also be a good idea.  YOu can ask the school psychologist if he knows of any or your own pediatrician. I would also suggest looking for some small peer groups activities for him to join..chuch youth groups, theatre groups, specialized clubs or classes in areas he is interested in.  Finally, with the stress level increasing as his work load does, you may want to consider placing him back on meds, at a lower dose and only on school days, to help him focus and organize.  Please do not think I feel medication is the only answer, but it can be a helpful transitional tool while he adjusts to the added acamdemic pressures and learns to be organized.

Answer 14

All I can tell you is that most school systems have a lot of kids to look after, so you really have to stay on top o them if you want results, my brother began going to a boarding school at the end of his sophomore year, and if he hadn't he would never have graduated on time, because the school that he had attended wasn't paying any attention to him or the classes he needed to be taking to graduate. So if you have already talked to his guidance councilor once try again,...and again,...and again. But if that doesn't work talk to his teachers, however I know that some teachers are just as bad and don't think it is there responsibility, but this is your child’s education, so if none of them help I would go to the school board. Tell them about your son’s condition and bring proof (some kinds of medical paper work. If absolutely none of this works the only other thing I can offer is to maybe put him into a special school were the teachers, and staff would understand and help.

Answer 15

you need to meet with his teachers and the principal. explain that you are trying to keep your child in the mainstream and away from special services, but his education is being compromised. when i was in school, the teacher took 2 minutes (not very long at all) to make sure my assignments were written down after class. eventually i kept forgetting and had a sheet with the assignments for the week sent home with me every monday. good luck!

Answer 16

I understand.  Don't you just love tax-supported public education?

Answer 17

If you get no satisfaction from the teachers go to a higher authority.  Make an appointment with the principle or head of the school.  Your son has a documented medical condition and in the US they must do all they can to ensure that he is able to succeed.  That is why "No Child Left Behind" was instituted.  Every school has teachers who work with special needs children, granted that ADHD is fairly common, they can help him with getting his assignments.  Try talking to the teacher one more time before making and appointment with administration.  Make sure you have the documentation for his diagnosis to back you up.  There are support groups for parents of children with such problems get on the internet and look for one near you.

Answer 18

I know many people with ADHD. I have a little ADHD. And OCD. And I am on medications. I think the teachers at your son's school should help your son, for the teachers at my school help kids with ADHD. If I knew any way to help you with your son's teachers, I would tell you. But at the time, I cannot think of any way to help your son's teachers understand that he needs this help.

I know I didn't necessarily answer your question, though I gave you as much advice as I could pull out.

I wish you very good luck to you and your son.

Answer 19

Is he currently under an IEP? My son is going through a similar situation. A lot of school systems are trying to take kids off of IEP's and put them on 504's. Request an IEP meeting first of all. By law, they have to give you an IEP meeting within 30 days of your request. Make a list of your issues & what has occured. Also, if you mention that you will get an education advocate if they do not do something then you will find that your school will jump like a dog through a hoop. It puts a black mark on a school if an education advocate is called in- they do not want this. I'm not sure what state you're in but there are education advocates in every state & it doesn't cost you if you bring one in. An IEP is to be followed by a school & if it is not, they they're breaking the law. Don't give up, this is your child's education!

Answer 20

this might sound stupid but get on gmtv and the school will give him more support

get social workers to help

call the education bored

hope it all works out.x

Answer 21

pray for your son...your son is now 12 and he is responsible for writing his assignments in his notebook...he isn't a baby anymore...he's still going to have to grow up someday...dont beat yourself up mom...we know you're doing your best as a mom...god bless

Answer 22

If your contact with his teacher is thru email send to as many people you can find that are good support for you.  A single contact e-mail can be quickly overlooked.  If the teacher realizes you have other people listed on there including your spouse, counselor or vice principles etc.  Then if you need to go above the school then you can attach all e-mails to the school administration to show detailed conversations, questions and comments.  This just worked for me to get my son screened for OT.  The day after school administration received my e-mail they asked me to call them.  I did and they had someone out the next day to look at him.  I was never negative and was as positive as possible without blacking anyones eyes.  Very effective.  Wishing you well!

Answer 23

I am a Social Worker and work with children with similar issues. You can contact Job and Family Services or since he has a IEP contact your Board of MRDD to see if you can qualify for assistance with special services for your child. Something that we do as well is make a program in the homes that consists of doing what they need to do such as in your case every time he writes his homework down and brings it home he'll get a sticker and then if he receives a weeks worth of them he can be rewarded with something that he likes and that can be as simple as going to the video store and getting a movie, or picking his favorite program to watch before anyone else in the family. You may also want to contact your YMCA they may have a program or two to help.

The school system can be hard to deal with, you can also take it higher up than teachers but the response that you are more than likely to get is that there are so many kids and one teacher. Can you volunteer in your son's classroom for a few days a week to help him out a bit?

Good luck and I feel for you. I am sending you some hope and strength it sounds like you may need it!

Answer 24

If your son is being treated in that shabby manner, then other children are also being victimized by the public screwel system.

If you can afford it, get him out of that PSD and into a parochial school.  If not, start going to the parent-teacher meetings and RAISE |-|ELL about that.  The other parents of mistreated children may fall in behind you.

Good luck.