How do I get my 11 year old stepson to be more hygienic?

Question

He doesnt even wipe his butt well. I have done all I know to do to instill good bathroom habits, (wiping butt, brushing teeth, showering etc.) I have tried positive reinforcement, consequences, explaining good social behavior. Any suggestions? thanks

Answer 1

Your husband should be the one to handle this. Step-kids don't want lectures from step-parents and he could be avoid hygiene just because you are the one who suggested it.

Answer 2

LEt him know that people do not like stinky kids. If he doesn't wipe well then he will smell like poo,if he doesn't rush his teeth his breath will stink when he talks to people,and if he doesn't shower...well...you get the point. Tell him that his friends appreciate someone who smells nice...not like a toilet. Also you can let him know that if he doesn't wipe or shower then it can lead to health problems...he could get sick...and if he doesn't brush his teeth he will get cavities and whatnot and have to go to the dentist and he is taking a chance on his teeth rotting and eventually falling out.

Answer 3

Are you his stepmother?

I think this is really Dad's domain.  

Answer 4

Tell him he smells funny....or! leave it 2 dad!

Answer 5

I feel for you.  At 11, it is very difficult to change behaviors in children, their personality is basically formed by age 5.  At this point it becomes an issue of re-focusing, rather than "training".  

I would ask him what he desires to do as a career in the future.  Start explaining finances to him, let him see your budget, let him know what housing costs, what the average income is for people who work low end jobs, and the dedication it takes to work at higher incomes to get the things you want out of life.  

Let him know that you are making his hygiene a priority because you want him to succeed in life.  No one wants to hire a person in a great job that smells skid marks, no one wants to hire someone with greasy hair, or smelly breath.  Let him know that his entire adult freedom to do whatever he wants to do in life, depends on his ability to be able to clean and take care of his self.  

Answer 6

He's 11. Probably getting interested in girls. Keep reminding him how girls like guys who don't smell like wet dog.