How do I get my 3 year old to stop hitting?

Question

This all started about three days ago. Whenever she don't get her way she starts hitting you and screaming. I want to stop this before it becomes a real problem. Any suggestions would be helpful...thanks

Answer 1

Put her in time and telling her that there is no hitting in your home and leave her in time out for 3 minutes.  Or ignore the tantrum and walk away...don't stand there and let her hit you.

Answer 2

For about 18 months, my daughter's only form of communication was to bite. Happy, Sad, Excited, Angry, she bit. When she was just under 3, I thought that there was no hope. But we started doing a few different things.

1- We did this thing called "nice hands" any time she would start to grab or hit or even looked like she was going to do it, I would gently take her hand and make it "pet" whatever she was going for and say nice hands. After a remarkably short time just saying "Nice hands" would stop her in her tracks and she would use nice hands. We practiced on her baby dolls and stuffed animals. When she would hit them I would cradle them like babies and give them lots of love and attention.  She saw that the animals were getting the reaction- not her. Then she would take the "baby" and cradle and use her nice hands

If she still hits after you try nice hands 2 times, on the 3rd time she gets 3 minutes of time out.

2- There's a little flip book called NO BITING. It's got very colorful pics and it's stuff like

"Are sister's for Hitting?" Then you flip it up and it says "Drums are for hitting" you get the idea.

3- She was in daycare so every day on the way to school, we would talk about how we use our nice hands with friends. And I would say "Is Landon our friend?" and she would say "Yes" and I would say how do we play with Landon? She would say "Nice hands"

It made a huge difference and she started teaching nice hands to her cousin who was 2 yrs younger so it really sticks

I would not recommend swatting her hand because that's the behavior you're trying to stop (And no, I'm not anti-spanking)

Answer 3

Graci's mom is all wrong.  you don't teach a kid to stop hitting by hitting.  Ever heard the difference two wrongs don't make a right. And there is a world of diffence between a 1 year old and 3 years old.

Answer 4

When she does this stop whatever you are doing, get a very serious look on your face, immediatly put her in time out and tell her, "You are in time out for hitting." Leave her there for 3 minutes.  When the 3 minutes is up, go get her, ask her, "Do you know why you were in time out?" Talk to her about why it is wrong to hit and what she can do instead.  My son (he's 2) went through this too and now when he doesn't get his way or gets angry he says, "I'm MAD!"  That gives us a chance to talk about it and then he's fine.   Whatever you do, DON"T HIT HER BACK.  I don't understand how people think that will help teach their kid that hitting is not acceptable!  How confusing to a little kid!

Answer 5

a swap in the hand does the trick...my nephew (he's 1 1/2) likes to do that to...its annoying, i swap him on his hand and he just stares at me. I tell him dont do that , be nice. Hitting hurts right? It hurts me too buddy.

Answer 6

hit her back i know a lot of people dont like it but it works my nephew recentally started bitting and pulling hair and biting him back (not hard but enough to let it hurt a little) and tuggin his hair (again not hard but enough to let it hurt) and just told him no dont (fill in the blank) because it hurts or tell him it hurts doesnt it it hurts me too when you do it  

Answer 7

yes , hit her back. My son was into biting, when i bit him back, he never did it again. im not talking child abuse here, just enough to get the message across that it hurts and not to hurt others.

Answer 8

hit her back

help?

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Answer 9

Some people would say hit her back. I mean yes it will show her that being hit is no fun, but it could also show her that if you can do it she can do it. So it is an option, but think about it first.

Other than that you could try time outs or something.

Swatting her hand would be the best solution as long as it doesn't backfire like I said before.