How do I get my in-laws to stay out of our business?

Question

My in-laws are starting to step WAY beyond the boundaries or my DH and I's marriage. The other day we were going out of town and DH's dad pulled him aside and told him to use protection. We were, ironically, going to tell them the next day that we were expecting their third grandchild. . . I really can't stand them right now and am having a hard time not going off on them. Any advice? (needless to say, we DIDN'T tell them about the pregnancy.)

Answer 1

Just make sure you are ready to put up with them being around more when that baby is born. Maybe this will bring you all closer together.

Answer 2

d**n I wish i could help have well had the same problems with my in laws luckily they moved to a different state. Did you ever think that your husband may be the one telling them too much info then they really need to know? That was my problem. Just a thought

Answer 3

Let them know that you are pregnant, and you don't need their "advice", but maybe pretend you do appreciate it just to make them feel better about it.  Let them know that you understand they are only looking out for you two, but you are adults and don't appreciate the advice they are giving out at times.

It's a delicate situation with in-laws and they do like to get in the way at times.  Best of luck, and congrats on your new little addition.

Answer 4

Your husband needs to stand up to them and tell them he can make his own choices and be firm. If he can't do that then you can. But it may cause alot of problems.  

Answer 5

Its your life not theirs, if they can't understand that then just ignore them..  

Answer 6

You and your husband need to tell them openly to stay out of your business.  It may hurt, but they will get over it.  If not, Oh Well!  Your adults, and make your own decisions like adults, just reinforce that.  You could always not include them, maybe they will get the hint.

Answer 7

That's a hard one if you say something to them yourself, you are the witch, if he tells them they are going to think it still came from you. However I do agree that it is due to his relationship with his parents, and he needs to stop telling them your personal matters.

Answer 8

I feel for you. I know your pain. My in-laws step way over their bounds at times too. They want us to have a child REALLY bad, and we are not ready, so they make comments like, "I can not imagine loving someone that much and not wanting to have their child" or "We will buy you a cruise so you can go get pregnant". Let me tell you, if we do get pregnant they will be the last to know!

I have learned to brush it off as much as possible, though.

Me making a big deal out of their rude and over-the-top comments won't make the situation any better. All it is going to do is make my husband defensive (even if he agrees with me he is always going to try to take up for them) and make me more angry because they will not change. I have opened my mouth before and said something like, "I don't think I want to talk about that" and they shout up real fast. Stand your ground when you feel it is definitely necessary, but for you sanity try to figure out a way to ignore their immature behavior.

Hope I helped. Good luck.