How do I get my younger brother to help with minor chores?

Question

My brother just turned 12 and currently he does nothing but leave all his stuff around and once in a while clean his room. I know that's just a boy thing but I want him to grow up to be a responsible adult, so I'm trying to make a chore chart for him.

I would like him to take out the garbage, do some dishes, keep his room clean, and various things like that.

Any ideas how to encourage him and make his tasks rewarding? I want him to feel like he is helping the family and not just doing those things just because he's being made to.

No "go ask your parents" answers please. I'm 22 and basically raising him myself because my mother doesn't care.

Answer 1

give him an allowance for helping around the house..

Answer 2

I used a chore chart with my son. The reward was one dollar at the end of the week for each task that was 100% completed for each day that it was assigned. Now, at 13, he is so helpful he doesn't even need to be asked to help out, and he never (well sometimes) grumbles when asked. And I can give him specific assignments to earn money, like organizing my drawer of screws, or scraping walls in the basement.

At 12, your brother is old enough to negotiate with you an appropriate reward for completing his chores. You can agree on a monetary reward, or awarding a special privilege, such as an extra hour playing video games. Never use sweets or food as a reward though, it encourages overeating!

Don't let him set a reward that is too difficult to meet on a regular basis, like taking him to an amusement park, or so low that he won't care. Explain that this is like the way grown-ups negotiate their job salaries. Kids like it when they get the opportunity to be responsible and be treated like an adult, and if you treat them like adults (yet recognizing their physical and emotional maurity limits), they start to behave like adults.

Most importantly - you must stick to the reward regimen. If he fails to do the chores, don't take him to the amusement park anyway, or give him money so he'll get out of your hair. What you need is to set up "baseline" activities that are fun, like going to the park, or playing an hour of video games, that he gets to do regardless of doing his chores (for some chores, like keeping the room clean, consider removing one of these privileges for failure), so that the rewards are "extra"

Answer 3

Is there chores that he prefers? Maybe ask him and then those can be his chores. BTW..kudos on taking the parenting position..

Answer 4

at my house their is a chore chart. You can draw chores from a hat for that week. Then the Child has the whole week to complete the chores. And if he does it without arguments then take him to see a movie or something he will enjoy. But you can't  tell him to do it that second b/c that would make him feel like he has to do it as a punishment.If he doesn't do it make him do something he doesn't like. maybe help with your chores but doesn't get the reward or something like that. You have to be patient with little ones. They weren't brought up the way we did.

Answer 5

You should try to bribe him by asking him to do his chores and he will get a nice reward but not to big.

Answer 6

give him small amounts of change for every chore he does that's how my ma does it for me

Answer 7

make a reward chart- every time hedoes a chore without complaining he gets a star on the chart or a certain number of stars depending on te chore. after a numbers of sars u decide on he gets a special treat (ice cream, movies, etc.)

Answer 8

if you feel that he is mature enough simply explain the situation to him,thats what i had to do with my 15 year old brother, or you could take the easy road out and offer him various incentives to do his chores.

boys, i think, are naturally messy in character. once you get him trained to it though he'll be like a little dog burying his bone after each chew

Answer 9

I'm 20, and in the same kinda situation. What I've found works, is, my little bro is into video games (XBOX specifically) If the chores arent done by 6:00pm, xbox gets put up for 2 days. If he goes 2 weeks with doing his chores good everyday, he gets a new game, or a new toy, or whatever, and it works great.