A month ago, my younger sister and I were home alone, and in different rooms. I was playing COD on my computer and she was in her room playing video games.
Suddenly, I heard a scream for help. In reply, I told her I didn't know how to beat the game, and I was busy.
About thirty minutes later, when going to my room to look for my laptop charger, I found her lying on the floor, choking on her own vomit. She had had a seizure. I called 911, and the ambulance came immediately, carrying her away to the hospital. She eventually lied one week late rin a coma.
However, only recently did I realize I found it arousing when I saw her spasming on the floor. I've been having dreams in which she was dying out in front of me, spasming out of control, and I wake up with frantic sweat, sometimes masturbating.
I know it's absolutely appalling for me to say that, I VERY much miss her, and I cry everyday over my inablilty to take action when I needed help. What do I do???
Tags: