How do I go about looking for a child I put up for adotion 18 years ago?

Question

How do I go about looking for a child I put up for adotion 18 years ago?

Answer 1

I'm not sure what country you're in - but if in the US -

Start here -

http://originsusa.memberlodge.org/

Also register here - ISSR Reunion Registry

http://www.plumsite.com/isrr/

Pop on over to here and ask for Gershom - who is a searching link wiz -

http://www.adultadoptees.org/

Many adoptees that I know would have LOVED for our mothers to come searching for us - but sadly - many were told to leave us alone.   *sad*

Read a HEAP - be prepared for anything - be patient.

Read loads of first mum and adoptee blogs - linked in the left sidebar of here -

http://chezblot.blogspot.com/

Good luck!!!

Answer 2

Let the issue alone!  If this child wants to meet you, let them do the searching.  They were the one who was given up.  Do not intrude on them, and make their life uncomfortable.  If it is meant to happen, then it will.

Answer 3

DONT ....Unless it will benefit the child ! . the grown up 'child' would already have a loving relationship with the mom that cared & did all the hard work for him/her for 18yrs. I know of many cases where the birth Mother has received a hostile reception from the child, although every situation is different ,& you may wish to provide for the 'childs' future in your will perhaps ?.

Answer 4

can you add in information on the state your rights were terminated in and I will post up some direction for you to start in :)

Answer 5

Try placing adds in local papers and mags if this doesnt work try looking at b.d&m then check the aggent you went through

Answer 6

oh don't listen to the haters, obviously they have emotional problems, "both barrels" eh?

Pony-lover, there are people who can help you, in your yellow pages, the heading, "psychologist"

Good luck with your anger.

To the OP I hope you find your child soon and have a wonderful relationshp

Answer 7

you can go to a group home and find recoordds that is your best bet, trust me i was given np for 19 years but my mom found me by going to group home in the first month were the child was taken from.

Answer 8

you can go to the health department leave anote. you can go to the social secuirty place and leave a note. you can leave a message on cousinconnect.com and let your child kn ow. just keep trying sometimes they will see it i would assume they are probably loking for you also. take care.

Answer 9

Be careful!  The child you are trying to find might not want to be found!  I am adopted and if my birth mother contacted me, she'd get both barrels, if you know what I mean.  I wouldn't welcome her or validate her.  She made her decision.  I had no choice but to live with it and she should have no other choice but to live with it.  The reasons she put me up for adoption don't matter.  

I would seriously think twice before trying to find the child you put up for adoption.

Answer 10

If you have a name and a date, you can go to ancestry.com.  You can also contact the agency but there will be a fee involved.  Depending on the state, you can also find on birth/death//marriage/divorce indices. There are also tons of volunteer search angels.  Check with any search groups within the state that you gave birth.  Good Luck and I wish you peace.  I commend your strength in your search.

Answer 11

Go back to the agency you adopted them off to they should be able to put you back in contact hope you find your child!!

Answer 12

Dont listen to some of these people who are discouraging you,  its better to find out for yourself, just make sure to be prepared.

Ok first i would say get in contact with the agency you went through to put the child up for adoption because they will be your best bet and be able to provide you with the most information on the child/adoptive parents. If that turns out to be no good, the internet is your best bet. Also i'm not sure about your situation but my adoptive mother knew other people who got babies around the same time from the agency and one of them knew someone who knew someone, that eventually led to us finding my biological mother who lives 20 mins away in the same state.

Just remember to be careful and ready for anything. They may not even know they are adopted, I didnt for the longest. My parents and I were both lucky and glad, but every situation is different and this is one of those very emotional and confusing things, especially for the child. I wish u the best of luck!!

Answer 13

You could try getting some information through the agency that did the adoption.

Find a search Angel to help you look. Look up some adoption registries.

Be prepared for anything though if you find your birthchild.

Answer 14

try going to the agency where you first put him up, even though he might be a legal adult by now, they should still have contact information on file........ GOOD LUCK!

p.s. : This can take a while and be somewhat difficult

Answer 15

http://affiliates.reunion.com/a/landa/la...

this might help