How do I handle a breakup of a relationship?

Question

I don't like the sound of "divorce" and I sometimes feel like I am Ok. I was the one wanting out. But some days I feel like I have ruined my life forever. The men I meet now are no better then my ex. I am sure the problems in my marriage were mostly his fault. I wanted the divorce. I am not sure what I am wanting from this question. I have erased it twice already. And I am supposed to be some one who knows these kinda answers.

Answer 1

It is seldom if ever only one person's fault. But the death of a relationship is the first stage in a process in which the relationship is mourned and then laid to rest to make way for self renewal. It is a crisis that must be lived through. More than that, however, more than just a time for picking up the pieces, divorce can be a new opportunity to improve on the past and create a fuller life-if you can come to terms with the past, recognize self defeating behavior, and be willing to change it.       Dr. James C. Ronning

Answer 2

Obviously with more care and thought than you used getting into it!

Answer 3

I don't think anyone knows the best way to handle a divorce or a breakup.  It's something you have to work out for yourself, and what works for someone else might not work for you.

I think therapy's always a good option, though.  I know if may seem strange to go to a therapist or a psychologist, but it's normal and healthy, and asking for help makes you a strong person.  A qualified professional will be able to give you advice tailored to your specific situation.  Good luck!

Answer 4

Yea i think we all go through confusing periods after a break-up, obviously your past relationships weren't right for you so had to move on. Im not exactly sure what you are looking for either but the best advice i can give you is to try to leave those in the past and move on, and you may just find someone thats perfect for you.

Answer 5

I know exactly how you feel, i have been there,  I WAS SEPERATED FOR 6 YEARS AND AFTER DATING PEOPLE I WAS NOT SO SURE OF, I TRIED TO GIVE ME EX ANOTHER SHOT, SO I MOVED BACK IN WITH HIM, IT LASTED 6 MONTHS, AND THEN, THATS WHEN I TRULY KNEW I REALLY WANTED A DIVORCE, SCREAMING AND YELLING DID NOT GET ME ANYWHERE, SOO I TOOK OFF AND WENT ON MY OWN FOR A COUPLE YEARS DID NOT DATE ANYBODY, START OVER A BRAND NEW LIFE WITH ME AND MY SON ONLY, AND WORK, THEN WHEN MY SON GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL, THEN I STARTED DATING AGAIN, I NEVER HEARD FROM MY EX, BUT ONCE HE DID CALL ON CHRISTMAS, AND I TOLD HIM, I WAS DATING SOMBODY AND THAT WE ARE IN LOVE, AND THATS IT, AND I WANT A DIVORCE, EVEN YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND OR NOT, JUST LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU DONT NEED HIM REALLY, AND THAT BUT LEAVE HIM DOWN GENTLY, BUT, LEAVE HIM TO WHERE HE HAS NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO DIVORCE YOU, BUT I KNOW YOU HATE THAT WORD I KNOW IT TOOK ME AWHILE TO REALIZE IT WAS OVER, YOU HAVED TO WEIGH YOUR PROS AND CONS, ASK YOURSELF HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU GUYS ARGUE? AND HOW MANY WERE VILENT , AND HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU WIN? AND HOW MANY TIMES DID YOU GUYS MAKE LOVE HOW MANY TIMES/, JUST THINK, YOU WILL BEW ALRIGHT, JUST THINK OF MARY TYLER MOORE . AND MEEE, I DONT THERE AND BEEN THERE, HONEY,