How do I handle loud neighbors who never get caught?

Question

I live upstairs in a 2-bedroom apt with my boyfriend. We are quiet, usually our only excitment is having friends over to watch movies. We observed the 10pm-9am quiet time, don't hog front parking, and put-out smoking cans for one of our neighbors (to keep the yard clean). Our downstairs neighbors (right below, same floor plan) are beginning to scare me. When we first moved in, the wife/mother (stay at home) began playing loud, high-pitched music at approx. 11:30am every day. Sometimes I work nights and need to sleep. This music could be heard several hundred feet away (I experimented) and they often leave their windows and doors wide open. I had to complain twice and now the music is not a problem anymore. It was an anonymous complaint, but I believe they know it was us and are now getting back. My sister visited and accidently scuffed the door of their car with hers; after they called the police on us, and their son threatened us, I thought we made peace by bringing them a jar of rubbing compound and a traditional homemade Bosnian dessert. (They are Bosnian) But the problems have increased. The son blasts his music in his car when he comes and goes. They slam the door so hard my pictures shake. They have relatives across the parking lot in one of the other buildings and visit by standing in their doorways and yelling. They converse by yelling; they are very vocal. Every time management tries to confront them or catch them, they 'don't speak english.' However, they spoke perfect english while yelling at us until the police arrived after the car incident. If I am outside my apt. door, or coming home, or leaving no matter what time of night or day, their front door will fly-open and the father (head of the family I believe) looks-out and glares. I'm not sure how he knows anyone is there unless he watches from the windows. I do not know how loud they have to be during the day for it to be a nusance. Whenever the office sends somebody to respond when I complain, they ride-up in a little golf cart which is heard quite a ways away, giving the neighbors time to turn-down their music, etc. Everybody else in this section of housing is quiet as a mouse. My other 2-neighbors work regular hours, so are not exposed to this daytime nonsense. I do not know what to do; they've slammed their doors a dozen times today, which is why I'm not sleeping! There is nothing I can legally do to document their behavior except on paper and then it is my word against theirs. They have lived here for 8-years, I for 8-months. They said after the last confrontation they never had any problems with their previous neighbors. I wonder if they were afraid of what would happen if they did complain. With every complaint they continuously find a way to play the culture card. Their culture is not what I have a problem with, it's their disregard for the people they are living with; but they voiced their opinion that I and my family are out to get them because they are foreign, which is untrue, but the crutch they lean-on. I recently received a formal letter of complaint from the leasing office that I had a 'wild party' and a resident found their car tires flat. This is a rather big accusation to make; the 'wildest' party I had was a b-day party with 4-people. I went in person to dispute this and asked my other neighbors if they had complained about me; no, but they had plenty to say about my noisy neighbors, so I believe it was them who made the complaint. This is turning into a war, I just want nice respectfuly neighbors. I'm wondering if I should go to the office and ask for some sort of mediation. But I'm afraid anything I do will make me look like the 'bad guy.' It is probably too late to avoid retribution from them. I am looking for advice. I know they might have their ways of doing things, but surely lowering their voices and closing the door quietly will not infringe on their cultural heritage.

Answer 1

First, you could begin a bigger battle, if not a war, you will lose.  If moving is out of the question, then you may need to take action.  But you really need the total support of neighbors who are experiencing the same problems.

Some cultures are louder than others and they may not realize what difficulties they are causing.  You said they turned down the music in the morning, which tells me they can cooperate.   As far as the son driving into the neighborhood with loud music, we have that problem.  In time the kid here grew up and the sound went down.

I would tape the sounds from inside your apartment, saying the time and date.  Not say anything about it because you are allowed to tape things in your own home.  Just make sure there are no other home noises like TV, phone (turn it off), etc., to disturb the taping.

Then I would go to management of the apartment and ask what they are willing to do.  Let them listen to the tape but do not give it to them.

I would then call City Code Enforcement and ask about noise levels.  Where I live it is 75 feet but, yes, you have to prove it.  

Retribution does not work but neighborly attitudes do help.

Answer 2

Your question is quite hard to follow, but I do think you should consider moving.  I'm sorry you are having problems with neighbours.

The first answer from "Prince Uranus" says that the problem with renting is that you can't choose your neighbours.  This can apply even if you buy a property.  You've still got to live near people to know what they're like - whether you buy or rent.  We've bought our property, but our nearest neighbours are renting.  When neighbours move out, we always wonder whether people coming in will be ok.

Luckily, we've had no problems - only one instance of noisy DIY in the late evening, and we had to advise the people it wasn't acceptable.  

Answer 3

First, your question is very hard to read, and you may get much fewer answers than your question deserves as a result.  I don't have a problem with the length of your question, but it's tough to read so much in one long paragraph.

My suggestion is for you to move.  It is not fair but it is highly unlikely you will win if you stay unless you can get your other neighbors to complain to the property management, too.  The noisy neighbors have been there and paying rent for 8 years, compared to your 8 months.  Unless management thinks the property will lose more by the noisy neighbors staying than their leaving, they probably won't get rid of the noisy neighbors.

Answer 4

this is one of the worst things about renting--you can never choose your neighbors.

my first wife and i rented for years and i don't know how we did it, but we always got next to the noisiest, most obnoxious people around.  why does music have to be played THAT LOUD?  

and the cigarette butts are EVERYWHERE.

i'd find a different place to live.  its about the only thing you can do.  good luck, there ARE good places to rent---the trouble is that most of them are already rented!

Answer 5

There is little you can do if you continue to live there.  Your only alternative is to find another place.  Good luck.