How do I handle my 7 year old daughter?

Question

I have a 7 year old girl and she is way out of hand. She talks back and when she does not get her way she will hit me in the face and she likes to kick me. I get nervous of how I should handle this. Someone please advise! I am at my end with her. I know that I am the parent but I am so afraid of bruising her and she is evil enough to tell someone that it happens all the time. It doesn't. Please help me.

Answer 1

The answer is NO! The request is "Please MAY I ..........! and when it is recieved it is THANK YOU! MANNERS are inportant so is disapline!

Answer 2

take her for a drive through the ghettoist part of town or make her volunteer at a homeless shelter/young teen mothers, ect

anything to make her appriciate what she actually has !!!!

if that doesnt work tell her you are going to sell her on ebay

seriously though-get counceling for her

Answer 3

Talking back means removal of privileges in my house.  I'm brutal- my kids know the rules and so I don't give second chances.  One smart mouthed remark and they lose something fun for a week.  Continued remarks lose them more.  As for the hitting, I would carry my child and place them on their bed, close the door behind me as I left the room and make them sit there for howeverlong you think is appropriate.  Also, there'd be a removal of privileges.  Just explain that from here on out, you have zero tolerance for hitting of any kind and that if it happens again, this is what will occur.  Then follow through.  Don't resort to physical retaliation and no other adult will fault you for disciplining your child.

Answer 4

Send her to her room.

Answer 5

I know that this a long answer, so I've broken it down in the following catagories.  Read what parts you like at will.

MY ADVICE    (what I would do in that situation)

MY OPINION1 (what often happens from spanking)

MY OPINION2 (what often happens from time spent together)

Second Half

1st Option   (how to keep this from happening again)

2nd Option (a place where a child can learn right from wrong in another way)

3rd Option   (who to call for help)

MY ADVICE1*Personally, I would sit down and talk to the little one.  Let her know that it is not alright to hit people, and that it hurts to get hit.  Then perhaps, get her into something active to help her let out this energy.*

ex.  She likes to kick, so put her into soccer or something.

MY OPINION1*To spank, only leads to fear afterwards, which turns into anger later on.  Then that anger will turn into hate which becomes a rebellious run-away, sneaking out, etc in the teen ages*

MY OPINION2*The closer you get to your daughter now, the better relationship you'll have when she becomes a teen.  Do more fun activities with her, like roller blading, skating, or something, but let her know the fun day ends the moment she talks back, punches, or kicks.  This has worked very well for me.  Making a "Fun Day" once a week, is something that she come to look forward to, and is less likely to act out when wanting that day to continue*

Well I'm sorry for the very long answer, but I do hope that this helps in someway.  In the source, I've added a video address for all parents to see.  It helps parents to understand.

(THIS SECOND HALF ARE THE OTHER OPTIONS)

                (READ ONLY IF YOU WISH)

OPTION

(To keep it from happening again, find out where she is even getting the idea and put it to an end.)

(ex. monitor what she watches on TV, what games she plays, and talk to others to see what she might have seen.)

You never know what a child has heard in arguments, or seen in a fight.  Everyone who enters their lives in one way or another, peers, family, neighbors, even those they see on tv, in a music group, have an impact on children's minds.  What they are told isn't nearly as strong as what they see and hear from those around them.  Especially when those they watch are unware that they are near... near enough to hear what all goes on and what is happening.

Second Option

If all else fails, find a place that can teach her otherwise.  With the right instructor, she could learn right from wrong, what she can and can not hit, how to control that energy of hers and how to use it for a more positive way, rather than a violent way.  She can also learn how rules are made to protect them, keep them safe, keep order, and how rules make things safe and fair for all those who follow them.  Like rules in sports are made to keep things safe and fair.

Having her join a martial arts, such as Tae Kwon Do can teach so, to do just that... in the International Tae Kwon Do Federation (ITF) at least anyway.  I can't really speak for the other styles.  With the right instructor, Tae Kwon Do can do so much for a child's development in both emotional and mental development.

Third Option

Contacting a Pediatrician, explaining the situation, and taking your daughter to whom ever the Pediatrician recommends to help her figure out what problem she might have and how to handle.

Answer 6

back talking is one thing. but slapping you is another.i mean if she is playing it`s OK.but if she did it case she is mad i would not take that.

Answer 7

SPANKING..... HELLO !!!!!!!

Answer 8

This kid is way out of control. I hate to say it but it sounds like she needs a spanking. Not all kids need spanking but your does. I also suggest that you get her counseling and take away ALL privileges. Make her sit in her room with nothing when she acts up. You have to be consistent if you want this to stop. Put her in boot camp mode. Take it all away and everytime she does a chore or behaves well give it back slowly. But when hits you no TV for a whole week. Don't serve her her favorite foods or anything. Prison style for her now if you don't want her to be in prision later.

Answer 9

Start off by taking away the things she likes, TV, or electronic games, or telephone for a week. And don't give in!

if she breaks the punishment increase the time by a week, or add more items removed from her activities. Like TV and telephone ect...

This should get her attention!

Answer 10

First off, I know a lot of parents have issues with their children at some point. You need to sit down and make a list of rules that everyone in the house needs to follow. No hitting, no slapping, no yelling, listen , do what your told, homework comes first( this will get important down the road), do not damage the house or things in it..these are examples you can choose whatever you would like. After that make a list of things that they like to do: watch TV, after school activities (dance class, soccer, etc) allowance, bike, trampoline, computer time, playstation etc.) After you have figured those things out. You talk to the kids explain to them that if the rules are broken this is whats going to happen. There will be consquences to their misbehaved actions. HITTING IS A NO! At seven years old you can place them in a corner for 7 minutes..but I would suggest taking things away instead. Like okay..you hit me or  you didn’t listen to me. You loose TV for tonight. You have to find something else to do. You have to follow through EVERY time they misbehave or it will not work. After enough time of them making the mistakes and getting punished for it..they will start acting better and behave more frequently.  If you slack and do not punish every time..they will not get better..and not take you seriously. This will work. For more tips and help go to the SuperNanny website or watch SuperNanny on Wednesdays on ABC 7pm/8pm central time..not exactly sure on time. But she has a lot of great tips you can use. Hope I helped!

Answer 11

Children need and thrive on rules, regulations, schedules and discipline. You are the parent. Sit her down and explain what you will tolerate and will not.  Explain if she breaks a rule what consequence will be and follow through. She is seeing what she can get away with and what you will just give in to.  The old saying spare the rod and spoil the child comes to mind.  You need to give her a spanking or wash mouth out with soap or jalapeno peppers. She needs discipline. You must take control of situation. Take away all toys, tv and priviledges til she learns proper behavior. She also needs chore chart, as she should be contributing to household.....There will be no bruises if you do not abuse her. A spanking on the bum, hard, to get her attention works wonders, as does loss of everything she values, toys, priviledges, etc.  When she hits you or kicks you, restrain her firmly and in a stern voice explain that is unacceptable and will not be tolerated.  Explain you understand frustration, but this is life. Then make her sit quietly (no talking, n o faces, no crying, no whining, nothing) til you say so. Make her stay until she can learn self control. WHile she sits remove toys/tv whatever it is and explain why  and how it can be earned back.  You must take control and do so now......this cannot continue.

Answer 12

Perhaps she has a neurological disorder. Not trying to be mean but I had a lot of problems with my son and we just recently found out he has aspergers. While I have searched this disorder I have found many more that fall along the same lines. What happens is the brain becomes to stimulated and then the child acts out emotionally.  there are many types here are just a few ...  NVLD, aspergers, NLD, Adhd, mood disorders, sensory issues and many more where these come from. If she has another issue or one of these above depending on what it may be there are ways of disciplining them that will work. With my son he become confused and acts out because of confusion, so sometimes I say this is not correct behavior and because you acted this way. SO this is going to happen today  you can't do this or that or I am taking this or that away. be consistent and give her the evil eye. Make her afraid of you.

Answer 13

NOT THAT I DON'T BELIEVE IN COUNSELING BUT THAT SEEMS A LITTLE DRASTIC..SHE IS TESTING YOU AND SHE IS WINNING..AGREE WITH WHAT THE OTHERS HAVE SAID ABOUT BEING CONSIST ANT..I HAVE HAD THE SAME PROBLEMS WITH MY 7 YR OLD DAUGHTER AND THE THING THAT HAS HELPED THE MOST IS  FOLLOWING THROUGH WITH MY THREATS..GOOD LUCK

Answer 14

You should paddle her. Not so hard it will bruise, just to get the message across.

Answer 15

Take away the things she likes. That usually works. And whip out you open hand and spank her toosh. Just don't go overkill. Just a few spankens should be fine. And don't give into the guilt. Then reward her for good behavior. Not the faker behavior. But spank marks on the toosh don't last very long as long as you use a open hand.

Answer 16

One thing I would try to do is make sure she gets to Sunday school, vacation Bible school, and any Christian clubs or activities like Awana-which is a really great Christian program where kids earn badges and jewels for memorizing scripture. They also play fun games, have puppet shows, have special days, and learn lessons. They usually meet at a church on Wednesday.

It helps if a child learns that there is a God who cares what they do, that God calls on children to obey their parents.

I would limit her exposure to tv and computers. I would suggest you try to cuddle her and tell her you love her a lot. It is instinctive to withdraw when she behaves like that but then I think she probably knows she is doing wrong and it makes her mad that maybe she thinks you wouldn't love her as much.

Is she jealous of a sibling. It's easier to hug and cuddle the more obedient one. Try to hug her too as much.

I would also pray against a spirit of disobediance with respect to your child. I would also pray for wisdom in disciplining her.

It might be helpful to try to get her into a number of afterschool activities or sports to give her a chance to burn off some energy and develop some discipline. If she acts better with other people around maybe you can invite a friend of hers around so she'll behave better. Anytime she is in an activity you are at least getting some break.

I believe this is just temporary and that God has a way out of this for you.