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How do I handle my sister-in-law and holidays?

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I was separated from my husband for a while this year. Our sister-in-law has always told me "we are married to the same type of man. Any time you want to talk I understand." So, feeling very frustrated about some things and feeling she was sincere in her offer I made the mistake of attempting to talk to her about something we were dealing with. She ignored my email for a while, but eventually she called and offered a very kind but vague comments to me. I realized I should not expect her to be a confidant and discontinued speaking to her about things, however, I did send her a birthday greeting and tried to send some friendly emails after that to which she never reciprocated. I have not spoken to this woman in a number of months now and the holidays are coming up and I realize I'm going to be expected to spend some time with her, and I really don't want to. It is just all pretentious and I'm not into that. Obviously my husband and I are back together and I have not said anything to him about this because he wouldn't understand nor do I believe she would. And, I think she'll be nice as long as I'm married to her brother-in-law but if problems come up I'll be dropped like a hot potatoe again. How do you think I should handle this?

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  1. The only way that you could maybe solve this problem is going to be talking to the sister-in-law at the holidays.  If you don't want to do this just pretend like everything is ok, thats about all you can do


  2. Have a strong united front with your husband. Develop an air of self-sufficiency that does not require anything other than civilities with her.

    Google a short piece called Desiderata. It should help you with this.

    Focus on positivity, not negativity. Let the past go (with her) & focus on her tomorrow plans in her life but not yours. Best wishes. UK

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