How do I handle other people's children hitting mine?

Question

My 2 year old & I were at an art class. My child was sitting next to me in the chair when a little girl walking by, about the same age, looked her square in the face and proceeded to hit her in the face. I was so stunned I was speechless. I'm a new mom & don't know what I should have done. I feel guilty for not saying anything to the girl because I don't want my child to think that it's ok for someone to do that. Help, please!

Answer 1

explain to ur kid sort of like u no that kid that hit u in the face..." then keep going from ther and explain to ur child that it is wrong to hit/slap etc anyone and explain u should have said something to the little girl as in u should told the girl like u no its wrong to hit

Answer 2

It's called the "Louisville Slugger" solution

Answer 3

At that age, telling the other kid that it wasn't nice and telling the other parent is about all you can do.  They're still learning right from wrong.

I know it's madening to see something like that happen.  I had my kids at the park a few weeks ago and some kid who already had gold caps on his teeth and looked about 6 was messing with my 5 year old.  My son started to walk away and the older kid wound up as to hit him in the back of the head.  I admittedly freaked at the kid before he could go though with the swing, I think I startled him a bit and said something to the mom, who I think could barely speak the English language.

Answer 4

Whoever runs that art class should be told about the incident (assuming they didn't witness it), and they should speak to that child's parent, and if such an event even _looks_ like it might occur again, ask them to leave the class.  

BTW, just by the statistics, chances are that other child is subject to corporal punishment at home.    That is EXACTLY the behavior seen from kids who are hit - in their simplistic view of the world, they learn that when you don't like something about another person, YOU HIT THEM!

Answer 5

I'd say to the other child, "Honey, that's not nice.  Please say you're sorry."

Say it loud enough, and the other parent should notice and intervene.  The "honey" softens it a bit, and what you've said is, well, pretty much the only thing you can say.

In any case, you've made it clear to your child that it's not acceptable behavior.  There's no point in seeking out the other parent - kids have such short attention spans at this age that neither will remember - or understand - a belated reprimand.

Try to put it out of your mind for now, but in the future, know that most parents are perfectly comfortable with another parent intervening when our child is clearly out of line - hurting another kid or about to hurt themselves.

Answer 6

I think your instinct about losing an oppurtunity to teach is spot on, but don't worry...you'll get LOTS more oppurtunities ;)When my toddler hits or grabs toys, I say "Don't hit. Don't grab." When any toddler hits my kid or takes her toys from her, I say "Don't hit her. or Don't take her toys from her." I have no idea if these kids' moms took offense because, (have you noticed?) the moms of those kids are never around.

Answer 7

You have every right to protect your child. You should have told her NO, you do not hit, and where is your mommy.

Answer 8

I would have immediately found that child's parent & informed her of the situation.  You can't say anything to the little girl - it's not her fault at that age...it all rests on the parent(s).

Answer 9

Some people feel guilty or reluctant to correct another persons child, so instead you can give your child the words so they can do it.

If you see another child hit yours, calmly walk over. Get down on their level and tell your child "That was not very nice of (insert name); tell her, no, no, no I don't like that." This not only teaches your child to stand up for themselves and use their own voice to solve problems, but inadvertently corrects the other child. You are not scolding/correcting the other child, but rather you are letting your child tell them it is not ok.

If your child is too young for the entire sentence "No, no, no, I don't like that" Just have them tell the other child "NO, NO, NO and wave your finger up and down for emphasis on the words.

Do not feel guilty, you will have plenty of other opportunities to help your child learn to deal with certain situations. This may be the first, but it will certainly not be the last time this happens. Young children are learning, not just your own child, but others, so expect these situations and help your child learn from them.