How do I help my boyfriend get his mother to go to therapy with him?

Question

My boyfriend and his mother have a terrible relationship. She always yells at him and that's the only way they communicate. At 21 years old he needs to be treated better than that. I am in therapy myself and I have given my boyfriend tips on how to talk to his mom but they don't work. He would really like to go with his mom and get the ball rolling to a better relationship, but he doesn't know how to start. She's one of those typical therapy-is-a-waste-of-time-and-it-means-... people. Help!

Answer 1

"She's one of those typical therapy-is-a-waste-of-time-and-it-means-... people. Help!"

You said it all right there. If she does not want to go.... She will not go. Sorry, but you have to change her mindset before you can change her location. However more than likely she won't really benefit from it due to alleged stubbornness.

You can lead a horse to water....

Answer 2

Could he maybe send her a letter? Tell her that he wants to have a better relationship with her, but he feels he cant have a proper discussion with her, and that maybe therapy is a good idea, even if its just for one or two sessions, whats the harm?

Answer 3

Maybe she's not ready.  Maybe he needs to break away from that bad relationship, at least in so far as it causes him pain.  It may be that he needs to find that on his own.