How do I help my husband with our 6month old?

Question

My husband has a hard time with our 6month old lil girl. She's gets so fussy with him pretty much all the time.She knows who he is she responds to him as a child does to there dad (when there 6month old). She will be okay and a happy child when he has her sometimes. I don't know what to do he gets so upset cuz she spits up all the time and she cries and cries(not colic confirmed with doctor), She just doesn't give him a break no one else really has a hard time with her. He gets in such a bad mood when she gets like that. I hate coming home when he has had a hard day like that. I try helping him saying do this and try something different, or do what I do and all he says is I did I did I did well you must not be doing it the right way cuz she ain't liken it to much so shut up and do how I say she'll stop crying. Then when I show him how I do it he gets pissed saying you never told me and the same **** that every woman deal with.the normal"I told you,you just don't listen" It's his birthday today which makes this day even harder he can't enjoy some time to relax I know having a baby is hard work but I find it so much d**n easier then he makes it all out to be. What can I do to help him. Why does she always have a hard day with him? Oh he loves her to death he is his world but he has a lil bit of a short string when he can't calm her down or he doesn't ever know what to do.He is a great dad honest he just has a hard time with her. Help has any other woman had a hard time with this and what did you do, does it get better.

Answer 1

Resist stepping in when baby is crying with him.  He will find his way but he won't be able to unless he goes through trial and error to find the way that works for him.  You can help by stepping back.  

Answer 2

  Stop telling him what he isn't doing right or how he needs to do it and leave him alone, no instructing from you what so ever.  I have a feeling you are the one making him feel stressed and the baby is feeling his tension.  Try praising him, tell him to relax and go in another room for awhile.  Do this a week or so and see if it helps.

Answer 3

I'm in the same boat, my 2 month-old son is very fussy with his father but easy with me. His dad gets frustrated way easier than I do too and it bothers me how quickly he loses his patience sometimes. I've heard that this is very common though, and that once children pass into toddler stage it gets much easier for the father. I'm sure that at some point your daughter might even prefer her daddy to you! Just be patient and give it time, you've all got 18 years to figure it all out.

One other thing - I've been told that babies are fussier with parents who are unsure of their own parenting skills. If so, this will also resolve itself in time.

Answer 4

Babies can sense when someone is uncomfortable holding them.  If he's all uptight while holding her, she'll react.  When she's with you, she responds.

If this is his first time being a dad, it might be wise for him to get into something where he can learn how to relax around her.  It isn't at all uncommon for first time dads to feel awkward and frustrated because of their lack of experience.  

If his short fuse is overly short, I don't think I'd be willing to leave him alone with her for any length of time.  Fear and frustration lead to anger.  A six month old isn't in a position to defend herself even from a father who loves her to death.  Literally.

Good luck!