How do I keep my 3 year old in his room and sleep?

Question

My 3 year old has been having bed time issues the last few weeks. We kept a potty seat in his room in case he needed to go in the night. That worked well until he used it to turn on the closet light. Now he has to have that on. Then he started to pee on the floor and will not use the "baby potty" as he calls it. So we unlocked his door and put a baby gate up high so he can use the bathroom. That worked for 2 days now he climbs over the gate. So we put the potty seat back in there and cont. to lock his door. He has figured out that he can use anything to unlock the door including play airplanes, monitor plug, ect he knows how to work the safety door handle things. Now he will cry and scream for hours sometimes from 8-10 over not wanting to go to bed. HOw do I get him to snap out of it and stay in his room?

Answer 1

Oh, that seems to be a problem. Well i'm not an adult, or a parent, but i suppose watching him sleep for a couple of minutes, or read to him calmly. Try not to scream or be pushy. It takes time to get use to sleeping by himself maybe.

Answer 2

You just need to have patience  and let him know what he's not allowed to do by keeping a firm eye to eye contact. If he screams, he does it because he knows that you give in. Get him a Spider-man (or other) nightlight, he might be scared. Just tuck him in and if that doesn't work, take all the toys out and tell him that he will have them back if he's good for mommy. The key is consistency, don't let him think that he's in control, you.re the parents and it's just a learning process like potty training. At his age even a couple of minutes of time out is ok. Remember discipline with love.

Answer 3

I don't think locking a child in his room is safe or nurturing. What message are you trying to send him? You don't get to lock your child in "prison" and stop being a parent because the clock says 8:00. You need to look at this situation from his point of view. How would you react? Did your mom and dad lock you in your bedroom at night? If so you need counseling before you damage your precious child further.

Have a solid bedtime routine that starts with snack time, brush teeth, go potty, jammies... Then have him get in bed and read him a story or two. Sing a couple songs. Then say goodnight. If he comes out of his room I would make him go back and tuck him in again. Tell him he has to stay in his room. Stay with him for awhile if he needs you. Rub his back or snuggle. Maybe even let him sleep in your bed if he wants to, you could mave him to his room when he falls asleep.Then again this is what you should have been doing all along--you have a lot of damage and insecurity to deal with now.

Children need to feel loved, safe, secure. Sometimes we need to stop being so "hard" and treat them as if they have feelings too. It breaks my heart to hear that people treat their children this way. Everyone wants a baby, and then they can't wait for them to grow up.

Edit: Sorry to attack you. I'm all for following the docs advice, but only when they give good advice. There are many opinions about these matters.My pediatrician says it's no problem, they'll grow out of it. I don't really expect you to adopt my philosophy on child rearing, but maybe just soften your own a bit. My kids used to sleep in my bed often, especially when they wake up from a bad dream...You can always move them after they fall asleep. I really just think your child should be able to come to you when he wants to. I really don't believe it is safe to lock them in either.

Answer 4

I would unlock his door, keep his closet light on, and allow him to go to the bathroom if he needs to.  Get rid of the baby gates.  If he comes out of his room, other than to use the bathroom, take him by the hand and lead him to his room and lay him back in bed.  Don't scold, don't talk.  Keep doing this over and over every time he gets out of bed even if he's throwing a tantrum.  He'll soon learn that it's just not worth getting out of bed.  

Answer 5

I have no answer as to how to keep him in besides being consistant, but you should never lock his door. If I were locked in a room I would not go to sleep out of fear at that age. Also when I have issues of my daughter turning lights on (it happens alot in my house), I unscrew the bulb a little bit so that it won't turn on and give her a night light in case she gets scared of the dark.

Answer 6

Before he goes to bed if you don't already have one, create a routine.  Make sure you tell him that it is almost bed time.  Don't make it a surprise.  When it is time for him to go to bed then lead him to his room, tuck him in, kiss him and door closed.  If he comes out, just bring him back.  You have to be consistent.  Show him that you are not going to bend on this.  My daughter was doing this at around 18 - 20 months.  She was coming out of her room to ours many, many times a night.  To the point where I wasn't getting any sleep at all for days.  The only thing that worked for us was leading her back to her bed over and over and over again.  She finally got it and just stayed put.  Now she has just turned 2 years old and the only reason she gets out of bed is if she has to pee on the big potty.  I would say it happens once a night every few nights.  Good luck.

Answer 7

Put on the coffee pot.  I think that you should stay up for about 3 days until he stays in his room. Every time that he comes out, lead him in with minimal interaction (so he doesn't feel like he's getting attention from coming out).  No eye contact and keep sentences short and calm "sleepty time now.  Use your potty in your room."  It should get better every night and eventually he'll learn that he's better off staying in bed.

Good luck!

Answer 8

It sounds like he has some security issues right now.  My son is 2 and what we usually do is keep his door open and he has a tv in his room.  He's allowed to have tv a half an hour while he is in bed and then it goes out.  But there are times in the middle of the night where he jumps into bed with us.  Try to keep his door open and alot of kids are scared of the dark so either keep the closet light on or get a night light for his room.  And if that don't work try and bribe him a little bit.  It won't hurt to try.

Answer 9

You shouldn't lock a child's door.