How do I kick out my band's bass player without causing a scene?

Question

So my band has been together for a little over a year now and we've all been through a lot together, but our bass player has always been this huge douche-bag and we realized we sound a lot better without him anyways. He always lies to us, he never helps unload or load the van to go to gigs, and he can't act as a team member, so we want to kick him out. How do we go about it without hurting his feelings and making him swear revenge on the band?

Answer 1

Band meeting:  Tell him you've all decided to make a change.  His feelings may be hurt, but according to you he's a liar and a douche-bag.  Who cares if his feelings are hurt!

Answer 2

the fact of the matter is that on personal and musical levels, this guy is not right for your band.

the best way to go about letting him down easily is to focus on the musical part of the problem. if you go through the personal reasons i.e. (just why he is such a massive douche) then that will make things more messy.

i don't agree with the band meeting idea. its best if only one person talks to him about it, that way he doesnt have to feel like the band is ganging up against him unfairly.

have one person talk to him and say things like

(hey man, i'd like to talk to you about something. as a band, we have decided after discussion that the band's best interests are the most important thing, and we feel that your sound isnt right for the best interests of the band. don't get me wrong your a skillful bass player, but we just think that someone else might fit into our group better. its nothing personal your a great guy (another lie but hey you have to be diplomatic) but we just feel that if you looked around you could find a band thats a better fit for you.

hope that helps and good luck. also i hope you find a real good non-douche bassist real soon haha,

Answer 3

Just tell him his out then tell him why you are kicking him out, if he sounds that bad you shouldnt worry how he feels does he care how you feel? plus he might not be able to find another band to join if he does they'll proberly kick him out too. so if he wants revene\ge by getting a better band i'll doubt he would get in one. or

you can all start acting really annoying, moody and very badly so he'll want to leave. hope that helps sound how, for me i would of done the second.

Answer 4

If you're all in agreement that you want him out, call a band meeting, and as a group, tell him he's out.  Explain why.  Don't make him wrong or make it sound like he's a bad guy -- its just that his playing just isn't right for your band's sound and you're looking for someone who's more of a team player.  Make sure he knows its purely a business and creative decision and has nothing to do with him personally.

Of course his feelings will be hurt, you can't avoid that, but if you can make it clear that his firing isn't about your personal feelings about him, it will go a bit easier.  Then wish him luck in his future musical endeavors and offer to recommend him to any other bands you know who might be looking for a bass player.  

Good luck.

Answer 5

try telling him the reasons why you want to kick him out...and then KICK!

Answer 6

Do it as a band. Call a meeting and tell him that you all feel the need to try a different bass player.

Do not go into details, that only makes it worse.