How do I know if my man would cheat?

Question

I live in Germany and my man in North Carolina. We have a daughter of 5 years together. We met in 2002, had our baby 2003, and 2004 we broke up. Now since January 2008 we are a couple again. He also came to visit this year. He is joining the Army again to come to Germany and marry me.

He is going back to AIT soon because is getting a new MOS (job) in the Army that he needs to be trained for.

He has never cheated before, at least not to my knowledge. I have tested him many times also (as sick as it may sound). I have access to all his online accounts, be it e-mail, bank or whatever. He knows that. So obviously he has nothing to hide. He is really not the cheating type. But he is the type to love s*x. But we've been apart now since January because I currently live in Germany, he was here to visit once this year. So he has went all this time with no s*x, which I do believe, because I can reach him at all times, he tells me where he goes and what he does always, I don't even have to ask. So he really has never given me a reason not to trust him. But also no woman has thrown herself at him. I trust him not to go look for it but not to turn it down if it comes to him, that's the best way to put it.

And I know that both females and males are in AIT for training. And they do get freetime where they are not supervised. I have heard of a lot of s*x going on in those places, especially people cheating because they think their partners will never find out.

Answer 1

There are no sure things in this life. All you can do is trust that he is going to be faithful - that's all you can really do. Never fully assume though that you have complete control. You have access to all of his accounts - that you know of! You don't think it's possible that he has other accounts? It happens - just know that you cannot control every aspect. Testing him and checking on him constantly is only going to drive him away. Either trust him completely or get out of this relationship.  

Answer 2

TRUST!

Answer 3

From this and your last question, you really do not need to be marrying this guy. It's too bad you are still hanging onto each other after all this time. I just don't think things will work out for you.

You sound very controlling and manipulative, and slightly paranoid. I think you need counseling.

Answer 4

Wow.....you sound like you really dont trust him! Has something happened previously in the relationship for you to lose all trust? Or in a past relationship? Because if nothing has gone on, you have no reason to have all his account details and to basically, be stalking him! You need to leave him be for a bit, trust him not to cheat and let him come back when his training is done.

If he loves you and wants to be with you, he wont cheat. However, if you keep pushing and pushing and following him etc you will force him into it! He will probably get fed up and cheat to pi** you off. Sorry but thats the way it works.

You need to learn to trust him before you get married. If you cannot do this, you need to break up and move on. But basically, to answer your question - you don't know if your man will cheat. You can't know. Sorry! Good luck.