How do I make many new friends when I move and not get shy or discouraged

Question

I tend to be shy, for no good reason. The new friends I have made approached and befriended me. How can I make more friends, have more self confidence, and come up with ideas of what to do together?

I get discouraged because I have 3 children ages 3, 2, and 3 months; so it's difficult to go anywhere with them. (Even playdates!- ahh!) My husband isn't very outgoing and prefers to do things alone.

Also, I'm afraid of not finding a babysitter or a couple to watch my kids so that my husband and I can go out once in awhile. Our relationship needs it!

Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I was sort of the same type of person before. Still, I am not saying I am initially an outgoing person, although I am ridiculously outgoing after knowing the person.

What I know is that if I stay shy and I don't talk to a single soul, I will end up going home and bore myself. If I talk to someone, the chances of them being an "****" are very, very small. Normally, people are also very shy... So, don't be afraid to talk to people. Use your intuition about whom to approach and talk, or just express a silly joke.

Arriving early to a bar and talking to a bartender is an excellent way of knowing people at a new place.

One, he's probably bored.

Two, he'll probably introduce you to other people.

Third, if you hit it off with the bartender, he might give you freebies, which always come in handy... but more importantly he will serve you faster than to others, and probably skip others to serve you first. You can definitely take advantage of that, and when it is crowded to order, ask a person next to you that you would like to talk to... what do they want (sometimes ask for their money, sometimes I guess it's good to just give away one free drink). --- Believe, that works every time, and works into long hours of conversation with the person you just save 20 minutes of waiting time.

Hope this helps...  

Answer 2

Find more ways to be confident in yourself.

Think of all the positive aspects to your personality and why someone would want to be your friend.

What do you like about yourself. Focus on the good!

When you see a friendly face, strike up a conversation.

"Excuse me, do you know what time it is?" or something lame like that will even work.

Try to read body language. If it seems chilly out or anything you can comment on the situation. "Wow is it cold or what! I actually believed the weather man and wore a t shirt today!"

Being confident about yourself and expressing your confidence is key.

Be sure to make eye contact and smile because that is the friendly thing to do.

Good luck!

Answer 3

first of all, you should do things when you are financially secured.

just work hard for now. baby sitter comes next.

never be too shy.

its something you'll regret for the rest of your life. trust me. been there. never worked good. :)