How do I respond to my mom???

Question

ok so last week i was gonna go to the pool with some friends and one guy asked me if i wanted a ride. i said yes because it was gonna be really hot that day and if i didnt accept i would have to walk and the pool is like a mile away. i tell my mom what my plans were and she was no no no i dont wont you riding with anybody. we kind of argued about it then dropped the conversation. when she got home i asked her why should wouldnt let my friend pick me up and that she should trust my decisions and then she said its not you i dont trust its your friend

now she has had the same response (its not you i dont trust its everybody else) for me asking to go to a concert, myspace, and a whole bunch of other stuff and now its really starting to get on my nerves

what can i say to make her give me some freedom and let me do things that a normal teenager should be doing

Answer 1

she's just worried. i wud be too, i mean getting a ride from some random guy off the street?? my mom is the same way though about concerts and stuff, my parents are over protective, im still trying to figure out how to deal with it, i feel the same way, try to convince them you're responsible and you deserve to live like a normal teenager!

Answer 2

My suggestion is that you take your friend's over to meet your mum..

She doesnt trust them bcoz she doesnt know them.. She is also afraid that the worse will happen to you while out with your friends and while with your friends things are out of her control.

So let her meet your friends that way she may feel a bit more secure when you are out with them.

Answer 3

yeah i'd invite our friends over to meet your mum, let your mum know where you'll be at what time and give her numbers that she can contact e.g. other parents... i would sit down and talk with her, how old are you? if you're 16+ then i'd say something like; ' mum, i really want to go to this thing, these people are my friends and i don't have very many (sympathy) i need you to trust me, i want to prove i'm trustworthy but i need you to have a little faith in me...' NEVER get angry when saying this! but i'd invite your friends over when your mum's home and get them to talk with each other, that's a good idea

Answer 4

I talk with think you should have a talk with your mom and let her know that she raised you right and you know what you are supposed to do. If she knows that you are serious about following her rules then she will let you do more things because she will trust you more.

Answer 5

Well, first of all don't get mad at your mom. She thinks she's just doing what's best for you. As much as I wish it was possible there's no way that i know of that you can talk a mom into giving you freedom. The best way to get freedom and get her to trust your choices is to make good ones. If she trusts you on something don't s***w up. If you make a good decistion she'll trust you more and more.

Answer 6

First of all how old are you? If you're young, you cant expect a mother to respond any other way!  

Answer 7

Hi!

Well first off,how old are you, You just tell her this "I am 14(my age but use your age) I should have a little more freedom then this.

Answer 8

I'm a mother and have a teen boy at home. Let me tell you that it's true I always tell my son not to ride in friend's car because they're only teen and just got the driver license for may be a few months. It's very dangerous I don't trust their driving skill. I had known a young guy who was driving with 5 friends in his car and crashed on the freeway. All of his friends died and he's the only one survived but severely injured and suffer a big memory loss. The accident was reported on TV, too.

For teen, accidents is the first leading cause of death in the worth. So do what your mom wants you to do. You'll understand more of your mom when yourself become a mom one day.

Answer 9

Your mother is trying to protect you, period end of story.  Be grateful that she cares about you.  You must be young.  

Answer 10

I agree with one poster a lot of it depends on your age. Let her get to know your friends. Trust is a big issue with parents and teens. You need to do things that allow her to trust you. Actions speak louder than words, my kids can give me lip service all day and it is what they do that counts. Reality is there are a lot of nasty cruel people in this world that look for victims. It is a parents duty to protect their kids. Talk to  her and find out what her concerns are and try to reach an compromise, ultimately she is the mom. Sometimes when I tell my kids that it is because I have a bad feeling about someone, I call it gut instinct and I have learned to trust my gut. Is this what your mom is saying? Communication is key to a good relationship. Trust can not happen without that.

Good luck. Be happy you have a parent who cares, some day you will understand what a blessing that is.

Answer 11

Being a teenager doesn't automatically grant you any rights. When you go behind her back and make arrangements that you know she disapproves of then you are showing that you are untrustworthy. We only get one chance to be safe. Don't blow it because you can't see the big picture.  

Answer 12

How about this ask HER to take you guys , then next time let you go your way and see how it works.  I had my mom follow me so she could see where i was going an it got her off my back...good luck your growing and she's just protecting you..

Answer 13

I know where youre coming from, I cant do anything! My mom checks all of my emails, myspace comments and messages, text messages, everything! But she probably would like to know who the guy is, i wouldnt ride with someone if i didnt know them very well.... it sounds like ..to me that you really didnt know the guy. But anyways, I know how you feel, my mom says that all the time, that she trusts me she just dosent trust the other person. Shes just being protective though, it just means she cares....  

Answer 14

Sorry to say but she is right, she has a lot of experience and the world is full of horrible people. If I were you I'd introduce her to your friends and hopefully she will learn to trust them, but then again they are teenagers driving and most aren't even supposed to have any passengers. Is there a bus or something like that you can take? A bike, rollerskates etc? As for going to concerts why can't she take you or one of those nice friends you introduced her to?  Myspace is an easy answer, show her what you do on there, show her that you can set your page to private and tell her it is just a place to talk to your friends and spend sometime looking around.  

Answer 15

let her get to know your friends

and depending your age she may in many cases be right, something you will realise when you grown up in that case

Answer 16

i only read the first paragraph cus i hate reading but i can see where both of you are coming from.. last time someone asked me if i wanted a ride it was a pervert looking for s*x. That's sort of what it means sometimes. Want to ride = want to have s*x..

So i think you just needed to make it clear to your mum that this was not the case..

If she knew this then just tell her that this person is safe and maybe take a friend in the car with you (or just say you are going to) so she will think that you are safer :D:D

Hope this helps

Answer 17

I don't really have a magic answer for you but my mum does that too it is so annoying! And about that myspace you mentionewd, just get it anyway and next time just get her to take you and your friends to the pool.