How do I stop caring about a best friend so much?

Question

My friend and I were very close... probably too close.Now we're in college but she has a boyfriend... it bothers me that she would rather be with him, I feel like she doesn't need me, and it bothers me to think about her having so much fun. They just started sleeping together too,which feelsl ike the final end to our friendship.I want to stop feeling like this, want to not rely on her,, but still want her in my life. How do I make myself stop caring? Am I jealous? Or do I just have a weird need to feel wanted and needed? I know she's guilty too, b ecause she is completely obsesed with him, but I don't want it to effect me.I feel weird that she's had s*x and is so intimate with someone and I have no one. I am not like this with any other friends, how can I bring our friendship to a normal level? And why do I worry about being sad/lonely in the future... I always worry and psych myself out and then i AM sad/lonely in the future.

Answer 1

I think you are jealous or just worried. She is either your wanna-be girlfriend or like a sister to you. She is your friend and she is a grown woman and I believe she can take care of herself. Detach yourself by tell her how you feel and then getting into more classes and being more into you and not into her biz. I know this may seem hard at first, but you'll get used to her being with her bf and you being alone.  

Answer 2

take up a new hobbie to forget about her. Seriously just dont think about the future.

Answer 3

To tell the truth, it sounds a little bit like you're jealous. Maybe even in love with her, but who knows.

Remember that it's her choice to lose her virginity in college, and yes it will bother you but there is nothing you can do about it, really. If you truly care for her, you'll respect her choices but stop her when she goes too far for her health (for example: planning on having a child while still in college, planning on getting married to the guy).

Trying to occupy yourself with other activities may help. You don't necessarily have to be looking for someone to start a relationship, but more friendships are always nice. Maybe get a part-time job, if you can, and try to expand your horizon. I believe that if you develop more friendships, you will focus less on worrying about your friend's actions and how they affect you. It's good to care, but caring too much can result in much drama that is usually a pain.

Answer 4

sounds like u like her.. bt if u dont then u guys we're just so close that u depended on eachother and now that she doesnt need u bc she has someone to share everything with she doesnt need that from you and i feel it.. i was kinda like that.. my best friend and i drifted once i started talkn to this one guy ( my bf  now) and he just did his own thing n i did mines and we are no longer friends bt thats for diff reasons bt to get over feeling that that i think u should get a gf, or a new friend that can make u feel "needed"