How do I stop my 1 yr old from throwing fits?

Question

My 1 yr old son recently wants me and only me. he constantly cries for me and follows me around. he wants me to pick him up and when i dont (because i dont want him spoiled) he throws a fit. i try to ignore it and do pretty good at it but once he gets started it get progressively worse. if i dont give him what he wants, picking him up, he'll even hit my leg or whatever he's got a hold of in anger. i try to devert his attention by giving him a toy or setting him down to play with him but if he doesn't want the toy he'll wave his arms angrily and hit it away. I don't know what to do? do i just set him down and let him screem, which i'm fine with if i know it's gonna work? how do i get him to know it's NOT okay to hit at this early age? And, did i do something to make him this angry all of a sudden? he's had fits before but they were always managable. he is teething but i dont want to use that as an excuse? help !! I dont want a bratty child, i will NOT go for it.

Answer 1

just take him to a sitter and let  him get on with it he will be fine and it would be alto better for him in the end and you they are a great help ...IE potty training +tantrum training

Answer 2

I have always given my children the attention they need when they need it! If i am busy I politely but firmly tell my children I am busy and they will have to hold on one minute until mommy is done!

My 2 year old is attached to my hip....until recently.....and if she wants held, I hold her...if she wants hugs I hold her...lovins...she gets lovins...whatever she needs.....she is by far NOT spoiled...she does what I tell her to do,....she listens to me...and she is a VERY good child!

So, maybe you aren't giving him the attention that he needs (I don't say this to offend you...because often we feel we give our kids enough when we may not be) try loving him more, and FIRMLY telling him we don't hit, and NO when he does hit! I wouldnt' go as far as to putting him in his room at only one.....I've never done it...so I'm not sure how it would work....but do as you feel fit!

I'm not sure that you can spoil a baby by loving them!

My son (our first) was like this, and we were young when we had him and he threw fits at one.....drove us nuts.......I know we would tell him NO and so on.....but our girls we settled into a little more of what they need (attention and so on) and even to this day I notice a huge difference in how he acts and how our girls act!

Best wishes...and remember he is still a baby! He is still learning, and he still needs his mama to love him and let him know that nothing in the world can seperate you from him!

Answer 3

I had similar problems with my first (I have 3), I used to simply grab hold of his hand (not to hurt him) make sure he was looking in my eyes by saying his name then tell him firmly (not yelling) NO. If he continued I took him to his room for a minute or two (at 1 it cant be very long) then give him a quick cuddle followed by a toy or somthing to play with- that was for all naughty behaviour.... if he came out and done something naughty again (like throwing his toy) we repeated till he got the message..... took awhile but he eventually grew out of if- dont know if it would work for everyone but it worked for me and gave me a second alone to calm myself and stay in controll- which can be hard at times :) I dont think you have done anything wrong.... he's just growing up into an opinionated lil man best of luck

Answer 4

Ignore the fits. They usually do it because its sure fire attention getter.

Answer 5

Whenever he throws a fit, ignore him - let him himself hoarse if that's what it takes. He does it for attention, and to get his own way. Let him scream. All children need to learn, sooner rather then later, that screaming and shouting will not result in them getting their own way. Do not bribe him to behave either. If he hits you, calmly walk away from him. Don't get angry with him - just ignore him.

if they don't learn this at an early age, they can become phyiscally agressive - and younger siblings copy behaviour from their older.

Nip it in the bud now - and make it clear to him that screaming, shouting and crying, does not mean they'll get their own way.

Answer 6

All due respect I don't feel a child can be spoiled at this age. There might be a lil seperation anxiety going on which can start any where from 8 mths to 14 mths and usually subsides at about 18 mths. This is completely normal. Give him the attention.

Answer 7

My son is fixing to be 14 months and does the same thing. It sounds like your doing the same thing as me. I've read just to put him in front of an interesting toy or something(which does not work). I've been trying to let him scream because I don't want him to think he can scream and get everything he wants. So maybe it will work. Good luck.

Answer 8

Ignoring probably is the best way, at least at home. Go even one step further, and tell him you don't want to hear it. If he wants to throw a fit, he can throw it in his room where you don't have to get a headache from it.

But in public... you can't really drag around a screaming child. I know that this will get terrible responses, but really, if he pulls this in the grocery store, take him to the bathroom and swat his butt! At one, he's more than likely still wearing a diaper, and it won't physically hurt him, but he'll get the idea that he cannot behave like a baby in public.

He understands more than you think. Telling him it is wrong to hit is something he will understand. He has fallen and hurt himself, he knows what pain is. Tell him it hurts you when he hits you.

Answer 9

I am going through the same with my 15 month old girl. She is hitting and now pinching. I think it's my fault for reacting to it the first time.

Try and let him do his fit and when he is ready he will let you know when he needs a little bit of cuddle time after. We are not an angry household and I don't know where it came from either.

I would say they get so frustrated not knowing how to express their emotions or speak it out all the way. Try and comfort him to get him to learn to express his feeling or want using sign language or words.

Good luck

Answer 10

I have a DD that just turned 1 the Begining of this month and I am going though the same thing. I have tried giving her a toy or something to distract her. I get down on her level and tell her the "Mommy is working/cooking/cleaning/etc" And that, " Mommy knows you are mad, but I have to finish" I let her "help" me, if she can. She loves to help pick up, push the vacuum, I take out pots and pans and she "cooks". Sometimes I just let her have her little fit, I just ignore it. Sometimes you have to find out why the DC is throwing a fit. Maybe he is bored or tiered. Sometimes I do take a break and take her outside, give her a bath or play with her, after that she is usually good and plays on her own. I DO NOT want a bratty child either, but sometimes I have to lower my expectations, she is only one and is exploring her limits.

Answer 11

ok, since he's 1, he is probably still in a crib.  When you are at home, and he starts this - pick him up, but don't cradle him, and put him in his crib.   Tell him that when he stops crying, you will come back in and get him.  and leave the room.  Yes he will cry and scream and throw a tantrum, but he's safe in his crib.  Also, make sure you keep his gums medicated with teething gel so he's not in so much pain.  

With the hitting, show him "nice touch" and make him give you a nice touch every time he hits.  

Good luck