How do I stop my 16 month boy pulling hair and hitting other children at nursery?

Question

He does this to me at home for attention, and knows he's not to do it but how can I stop him doing it to the other kids?

I don't want to smack him in case that gives him the message that hitting is OK, and he is too young to understand any other kind of punishment.

PLEASE HELP!!!!!

Answer 1

people have been spanking children for thousands of years and they all turned out fine.  Somehow in the last 30 years (when society took a drastic downhill turn) we decided that it was wrong. My mom spanked me and I've only been in 3 fights my whole life.  Spank the s*** out of him.  Children don't understand logic and reason...they understand cause and effect.  He hits a kid and a few seconds later his butt hurts.  He'll figure it out....Pavlov's child.

Answer 2

When he does this to you at home for attention, don't give him the attention that he wants. Bad behavior shouldn't be rewarded. Even at his young age. At the nursery, Tell the women that work there that you are trying to control it at home and you need their help by telling him, No Hit! or Don't Pull Hair! and taking him away from other kids when he does this. He is very young and you don't have to smack him on the hand, just remove him from the situation.

Answer 3

"spank him" he's naughty

Answer 4

ok, you cant stop that thats the terrible twos. jus do as ur told and  punish him when he does something bad.

Answer 5

My daughter also did this, say "ouch" real loud. Then pat him & something and say "you have to be gentle with Mommy".  If he doesn't already know the meaning of ouch, when he hurts himself you say ouch, he'll figure it out pretty quickly.

In response to those that advocate spanking a 16 month old, that is completely ridiculous and totally unnecessary.  I admit that I popped my daughter's hand once (she was a lot older than 16 mths) and I've regretted it ever since, I thought I was doing it as a last resort.  I was spanked as a child and I don't think it did all that much.

Answer 6

Next time he does that to you, you frown, look into his eyes & tell him seriously to stop!  Say it's a bad thing!  Then tell him you love him and that he needs to be a good boy and behave at home & at school.  Do that many times, and if he goes on, then I think you should him.  It has always worked for my friend's son "and" now he is older & obedient.

Answer 7

My sister hit people at daycares.  My mom had to take her out of it.  For hair and everything else tell him its not a good thing to do!

Answer 8

try this. next time he does this hold his hand look him in the eye and say NO that's not nice. and keep saying every time he does it. my 2 year old daughter use to do it and that's what i did and it helped a lot. i hope this works.. i know he is only 16 months but try it

it might work.. you just have to keep telling him No in a strong voise like you mean it.

Answer 9

First: know that this too shall pass. I doubt he'll be 22 years old and still doing this.  LOL.

Second: instruct the nursery that he should be removed from the other children when he does this. This is for their protection and also so that he doesn't get the negative attention he is craving. They can put him in a "time-out" chair and ignore him for a couple minutes.

BTW - before I had kids, I would have rolled my eyes at the "time-out" method, but it really does work wonders. They are craving attention and you can remove that by putting them in "time-out". They also don't get smacked this way, which I don't approve of. Hitting them doesn't teach them that hitting is wrong.

Good luck, sweetie.

Answer 10

Teach him how to get attention appropriately.  When he screams or hits (you or another chidl) say "It looks like you want my (or the other child's) attention", then show him the proper way to do this.  When he does it, give tons of verbal praise.  Keep teaching it, it'll take a few times for him to get it.  If possible, ignore the negative behavior and teach him the proper way of getting attention.  Keep up the praise when you see him get attention the proper way.  Use teachable moments, like when you are sitting with him in your lap.  Take turns getting each others attention, then generalize it to other situations.

Answer 11

I know it sounds kinda mean, but I did it once and my daughter never did it again...I pulled a little back and said, "see, you hurt mommy when you do that, it's not nice!" She kinda looked at me shocked but she never did it again.

Answer 12

My son did the same thing at that age. It's a phase; he'll grow out of it. Until then... he needs to be punished at daycare when it happens - time out for just a minute or two where he can't play with the other children, and he needs to be told why it's not ok to do those things. At this age you cannot punish him once he gets home for something he did at daycare. He's to young to understand that. But you do need to punish him when he does it at home.

Don't worry too much about it though. Like I said, he'll probably grow out of it.

Answer 13

You have to teach him that when he pulls hair he is being bad, and you pull his hair too, so he knows that if he does it some body night pull his hair too.

Answer 14

I agree with Kammy B just do it back and he will see that it doesn't feel good. and what do you mean he's not old enough for other discipline yes he is you can sit him in a timeout chair and tell him that until he learns to play nice he will have to sit in the chair. and a tap on the hand won't cause life long damage.

Answer 15

Make him wear padded mittens to school. Maybe he'll grow up to be a boxer.

Answer 16

9 years and some months ago i was the kid who hit everyone, i stopped wen my little sister, cple months old, hit me for taking her toy, i never hit again until i was 6 or 7