How do I stop my 6 and 1/2 year old from deliberatly wetting his pants?

Question

My kid wets his pants on purpose. If he does not get his way and has tried everything else he will threaten to wet his pants. It has gotten to the point where he does not always threaten but simply wets himself when he does not get his way. When he does not get his way he simply wets his pants. He will do this anywhere. If he gets mad I am also sure he wets his bed on purpose. He says he does not. If he is somewhere that he is tired of being and wants to go home he will wet his pants. It has gotten to the point that when we are going to be out somewhere for the day I feel like making him where a pullup or something else. If he was wearing a diaper/pullup he might not wet because it would not ruin the day. I am at the end of my rope.

Answer 1

Wow, you're got a little control freak on your hands.  All it would take is one kids to ridicule him for it and I think that would stop.  But I realize that is not practical if you live in a cold climate or you are at someone's house and they don't want Mr.Pee-Pee to sit on their furniture.  I think the pull ups are a good idea.  I would definitely put them on him.  Hopefully you can get him some help for his anger and control issues.

Answer 2

I would not put up with this.  I would put him in diapers.  Not pullups.  I might make him wear the diapers with just a shirt and no pants around the house.  Even when people came over.  If he was going over to a friends house to play I would make him wear a diaper.  I would put him in diapers at night as well.   I would do this every time he wet his pants.  He would know that wet pants ment he would be changed into a diaper.  Not dry pants.   When he threatened to wet his pants I would say go ahead we can just change you into your diaper.  I would put the diapers on his dresser in his room in plane sight.  I would also be sure he knew we had diapers and dry pants with us when we went out.  The minute he wet his pants I would not make it appear like it bothered me at all.  I would just put a diaper on him.  He would get the message in short order I think.  .

Answer 3

Well you could try the obvious take toys away be strcit etc. However if i was you then when he wets his pants leave him in them then he willl realise how gross and uncomfortuble it is and will stop it and if you are in public don't go home just walk around with him in his wet pants good luck....x*x

Answer 4

Well I read the posts and I think I am going to make him wear diapers.  Not pullups.  If he wants to act like a baby then I will try treating him like one.  If after I try this he threatens to wet his pants I will immediately take him up to his room and put a diaper on him.  If he threatens to wet his pants at the store(like has happened)  or wets his pants in the store I will take him out to the car and change him into a diaper.  If he pulls this on me tomorrow and wets his pants I am tempted to drag his little but to the store in wet pants and take him to the baby section and buy his diapers.  He does wet sometimes in school so I guess I will just send him to school in a pullup.  I am willing to try anything at this point.

Answer 5

if you 6 yr old wants to act like a baby, treat him like one. make him wear diapers, take his underwear and replace with diapers. do u change him after he wets himself and have him clean up? ever considered letting him marinate in his own urine when he does this, dont clean his clothes tell him he is stuck in them for the day, he ruined them now he has to wear them like that. does ur child not feel embarrased of his actions, do his friends and the rest of his family memebrs know he does this?  DIAPERS, he will feel miserable being the only one of his peers wearing them, and eventually break his nasty habit. punish him in a way for these actions. when he pees his pants do something like put him in cold water in the shower in his soiled clothing

Answer 6

have him wear the pull-up! they make them that big. dont call it a pull-up though, call it a diaper. that is ridiculous. another thing to do would be to immediately put him in time out still in the wet clothing. or, making him clean up his soiled clothing/any mess on the floor. or, require that he sit on the toilet until he pees every hour. i don't know, get creative and consistant. i do not think he needs to go to the doctor, he is obviously doing it on purpose, with control, to get a rise out of you and it's working. put a stop to it mommy.

Answer 7

I would simply refuse to change him for a good while until he realizes that being "pissy" isn't the greatest feeling.   As much as it hurts you shouldn't give in to his demands. It's just a cry for attention and this too shall pass with time.

Answer 8

Your little control freak has  a good thing going for him. You do what he wants or tells you or he will pee his pants.He knows  he has your undivided attention and will bow to him.

As others have said, let him stew in his own urine until bedtime. Put a rubber sheet under the regular sheet and put a pair(?) of pullups on him. If he wants to pull them off and pee the bed, so be it. He stays there till time to get up in the morning .

During the day, no pants, just pullups. He sits on the floor, tiled , vinyl, etc., but NOT the rug. Get a supply of waterproof squares(I don't know what they are called) that he can sit on while eating at the table.

Let him know that, if this is the way he is going to act, then this is how he will have to live with it, then completely ignore his peeing

If there is no medical reason for what he does he should be spanked, but this is politically incorrect and in many jurisdictions illegal and would have YOU in jail.

Eventually the problem will cure itself. When the other kids discover what he does they will ridicule him unmercifully until he stops.

Answer 9

take away his toys, spank his bottom, you dont have to beat you child to get your point across. no dessert. just dont give in or he will always do that. my friends child does that and its ridiculious.

Answer 10

You say this is an intentional thing. After taking off those wet pants I would give him a spanking on his bare rear that would make him think twice the next time this type of behavior occurred to him.

Answer 11

See a doctor to ascertain if he is doing this on purpose or if there is a problem

Counselling might help.  It seems that he is doing this as a way of controlling you.  

Have him wear pullups all the time, including when he is sleeping until the problem is solved

Answer 12

you could let him wet his pants and not change him so he knows what it fells like to not be able to change and maybe he will stop . you could also put diapers on him tell him hes still a baby and make him wear them all the time these two things helped my nephew stop maybe it will help your son

Answer 13

I would make him sit on the floor not carpet in his wet pants until he learns that wetting his pets it only ruining his day.

Answer 14

I think you hit the nail on the head.  Tell him that babies wet their pants and since he acts like a baby, he has to dress like one.  Humiliate him, even if you don't go the diaper route.  AND/OR smack his butt and put him to bed.  He needs to learn the HE is not the one in control.  Obviously, he's found a way to get a rise out of you.  Show him that is NOT what he wants.

Answer 15

take him to the doctor to rule out enuresis and quit punishing the kid.  try loving him cuz it may not be his fault.

Answer 16

First off, I hope you have or will talk to your child's doctor about this. He may have a physical or physiological issue causing him to act out like that. I am all for giving a kid a good spanking for doing something wrong when they know it's wrong. So, I'd defiantly give him a good spanking in front of who ever is around if he wets on purpose. Then put him to bed early. I also believe that the punishment should fit the crime. If he is wetting on purpose. Then by all means. Threaten to put him in diapers. If he continues to wet on purpose. Then carry through and diaper him.

Answer 17

I agree with about everyone here that said if he want to act like a baby...treat him like one....put him in a diaper, in a high chair....stroller...whatever just treat him like a baby and show him that he is being bad and needs to act like a big kid....

Answer 18

Peer pressure will resolve this problem.  If you can be patient and not react to this very clever attempt to manipulate you, he will tire of the discomfort he causes himself and will find the reactions of his friends and classmates unbearable.

Don't change his clothes or change his bed linnens.  If he wants them cleaned, let it be up to him to put the items in the laundry.  Don't react.  It will only signal that he has accomplished his goal of upsetting you.  On the other hand, if a day goes by without an incident, reward him in some small way as a method of positive reinforcement.

Answer 19

Do you change his clothes right afterwards?  If not, maybe you could leave him in his wet clothes (preferably in the backyard or a tiled room as to not douse carpet) for a long while until he realizes that it feels really uncomfortable and he doesn't want to feel that way.  Also for the night-time wetting, maybe you could take him to the restroom right before you go to bed.  Hopefully this will help- It must be a frustrating.  Good luck!

Answer 20

First, when you see him next spank his bare bottom so that he'll feel bad for doing something that he shouldn't. Then when he gets home from school make him wear nothing but a diaper unless he wants to play outside then nothing at all, and make him wet and p**p himself, and let him stay that way for 2-3 hours, and then change him, and tell him he'll stay that way untill he does what he's suppose to.

Answer 21

wow, i feel very sorry for you! it's kinda hard to tell someone to spank his a s s! but that's what i'd do. whether it'd work or not i don't know. he needs to have an evalution. don't freak out, it's not a big deal. take him to the doctor and see what he says. i do think he needs to be seen by someone.

Answer 22

First, take him to the doctor, to rule out any organic problems.  While rare, they do occur.

If there's no organic reason, I don't see any reason why you shouldn't put a pull-up on him.  If he's going to revert to babyhood, then that is how you will have to treat him until he figures out that it's not going to result in what he wants.

Good luck.

Answer 23

He's doing it for attention... either give him more positive attention, or stop paying attention to him when he does it....

But sometimes children do lose control of their bladder and bowels when scared... this happens with my daughter all the time.

If you are giving him enough attention and playing with him instead of making him play alone, then when he does it... and he tells you... ignore him and make him stay in his wet pants for a few minutes to see how uncomfortable it is...

if he is doing it because you know deep down you don't pay enough attention to him.. then make time.....and put him above all other priorities.

Answer 24

Okay, first make sure it is deliberate of course and not a UTI or other problem needing a pediatrician intervention.  Just in case.

But it doesn't sound like that.  It sounds like some serious acting out that needs to nipped in the bud.  My tactic would be to take away his clean clothes.  Let him wet himiself and be miserable and ignore it like he never did it.  He'll give up if he doesn't get a reaction from you.  It's all for attention!  You don't give the attention he realizes it won't work!

Do NOT NOT NOT belittle him with diapers or pullups or the punishments some people have posted here.  You can do some serious damage to him emotionally believe it or not.  I am a firm believer in having consequences for doing wrong but it can NOT be belittling or putting down.  I have a person I'm very close to who is to this day very damaged by his parents doing this!  Please trust me, you don't want to belittle him with diapers although it might make it easier.  Have him play outside if yo udon't want your house wet and let him act out out there.  The purpose of leaving him in his wet clothes is not to belittle him but to make sure he's nice and uncomfortable!

Answer 25

give him a baby shirt like one thats for chubby babies no pants and a diAPER

Answer 26

Make him wear pullups and ask him how he likes being a baby. If that doesn't do any good after a week or so try making him sit in his wet clothes on a tiled surface. Try not to give him too much attention when he does this because he may be doing it for attention, just pick him up and set him in the kitchen without saying anything and if he gets up put him back until he stays on his own for about 10 minutes. Try giving him positive attention if he can go all day without wetting himself, such as watching a movie together or having ice cream. Positive reinforcement really works! Try to stay positive and he will react to that. I have a very stubborn 6 year old too and it has worked wonders.  Hang in there and good luck.

Answer 27

First a doctor's visit would be in order to make sure there is no infection or hidden problem (with him being 6) second if no problems, I would take his booty out to the water hose and use the cold water rinse a few times.  Worked for lots of kids I know.  Stip him to his underwear and then on to the water hose.

Answer 28

Oh my I feel for you and completely understand.  My son does the same thing.  What I have finally come to understand with him is the more attention I give to him the more likely he is to continue with the wetting.  I'm not sure since this is a control issue for him that using pull ups would do any good.  If it were mine he would just pull them off and go on the bed anyway.  My advise would be stick to your guns.  Be consistent on giving consequences and don't back down when you know you shouldn't.  Plan ahead and keep an extra stash of clothes in your car.  Insist that he cleans himself up and supervise that he's doing it completely.  He'll fight it at first but don't yell, argue or get into a discussion with him about it.  Just simply tell him that if he's not going to use the bathroom like he's suppose to then he will have to clean himself up.  If he does it out in public allow him to walk around wet.  Don't worry about what others say,  A little embarrassment without reactions from you will do him the world of good.  Don't cave in, stick to your guns it may take some time before he knows he won't get a reaction from you and change his behavior.  Make extra effort to applaud his positive efforts for making good choices.