How do I tell my mom I hate my new step-dad?

Question

she just married him about two weeks ago and ever since she did e's been ruining my life...he won't lt me do anything and he won't let me go anywhere....My little brother and sister don't like him either he's a jerk!!! but my mom is like madly in love with him for no reason...& now she's pregnant probly with alitle brat!!! but I just don't want to live here anymore but I don't want to hurt my oms feeling but I can't take it anymore me and my little sister are decided if we should run away or not but I think we would miss our mom too much

Answer 1

First off, don't use the word "hate" if you decide to speak to her about him. Hate is a very strong emotion, and it will make your mom think that you are attacking her. If you and your little sister dislike your stepdad so much that you are considering running away, then you must tell your mom. Because if you do end up running away, nothing good will come of it and your mom will blame herself and she'll be miserable. Sit down privately with your mom and your siblings, and have everyone express their feelings, gently, to her. Tell her how things have changed since she's gotten married, and all three of you are not happy with these changes. You want her to be happy, but you want to be happy as well. Try to come to a compromise. You can't expect her to divorce this guy, but maybe she can talk to him and work something out. It's always better to say something than to stay quiet and unhappy.

Answer 2

Definitely don't run away.  That's crazy talk.

I'm sure your mom could justify her love for him...ask her if you're interested.

Have you considered that maybe he's over-disciplining you because he doesn't know how to step in to the stepfather role?  I can't say I've done it but I would imagine it'd be hard.  My mom's boyfriend is terrified of me...maybe you've got the other extreme.

Whatever you do try not to raise h**l in the house...just try to be open and honest about the issues you have with him...it'll benefit everyone in the long run.  I promise.

Answer 3

You don't.  If for no other reason because you love your Mom.  Running away will not solve anything.  It will only put you and your sisters in danger and hurt your Mom.

You should pull your Mom aside and tell her your concerns (Without saying you hate him!).  Tell her that he is never nice to you and always punishing you.  Perhaps your Mom can speak to him and leave the disipline to her for a while.

Now I know you do not want to hear this but have you ever tried talking to him?  Not about problems, just to get to know him.  Tell him you would like to work on your relationship with him and you think that maybe getting to know each other is a good way to start.  He may be so impressed with your mature attitude that he will treat you more as an adult and less as a child(But you need to act like one.  No name calling and no I hate you).

If that still does not work you could always look into the emancipation laws in your state if you are old enough.  Wait until your Mom has her baby (And try to treat the new baby just like any of your sisters).If you do not you may upset her so much she will lose her baby and I am sure that you do not want that.

Good Luck, I hope things improve for the whole family.

Answer 4

If your real dad is still around you can live with him. If he's not talk to your mom when he isn't home. I would say

I know he makes you happy but I feel like because he isn't my biological dad that he shouldn't be making decisions that are going to have a big impact on my life.

That way its not saying she shouldn't be with him but that you would prefer he didn't discipline you or tell you what you can and can't do unless its dangerous.